Tornado & Friends Mainline Adventures Series 4
by DanBarr1704
Summary: I thought I'd give the series one very last run, especially since I've had to make some significant changes in order to keep it going. So join Tornado and her friends Flying Scotsman, City of Truro, Hogwarts Castle and the others, along with some newbies, for one very last series. Rated T for language and please review. Bonus episode/Series finale now up!
1. A Bother and a Half

**Tonight - Olton Hall reveals all, a new character gets boastful and another newbie gets stranded.**

_**Tornado and Friends Mainline Adventures**_

Hello readers of this not very good and not so popular fanfic series, this' GWR Hall no.5972 _'Olton Hall'_, aka _'Hogwarts Castle'_ here and I'm afraid I've got some bad news for all of you. My mainline certificate recently expired so the Fat Director has had no choice but to take me off of the mainline. I must admit though I wasn't happy with the way I went out. I mean, I wasn't allowed to pull the train because of fire risks and the fact that there was a firefighter strike going on, which meant I was just stuck at the back of my special, the Wizards Express, and Class 47 Duff diesel no.47 850 was used at the top of the train. It was rather undignified for me but there was nothing I could do, especially since I actually did accidentally start a fire during my time topping the train at one point and I have apologised about that. Anyway, now that I'm off the mainline, instead of finding me a heritage railway to work on, its been decided that I become a static exhibit here at the Warner Brothers Studio Tour Museum in Watford for at least the next two years. And you know what, since I've been here, I've come to realise something. I've now realised that me and my friends on the mainline have been having the same adventures Thomas The Tank Engine and his friends have been having. That really does sound weird doesn't it? I mean, we've been having the same adventures that he has had…well, most of the time. Now, I'll admit that in the Thomas episodes we've had that you've seen me in, I have been portrayed as a bit of a brat, an engine with the sort of persona you'd get if you combined James and Percy. Believe me though, all those episodes that have seen me get splashed and covered in chocolate, they've all made me a smarter, wiser and better engine. You know, it reminds me of a Thomas episode we had that you haven't heard about yet. I remember when British India Line was brought onto the mainline to cover for her sister Clan Line when she had to go away and get her worn parts mended. Unfortunately, British India Line did become a little boastful about her new work, as you'll find out as I narrate what turned out to be our version of TTTE episode _'Time for Trouble'_. Enjoy!

**This episode stars:**

**SR Merchant Navy no.35028 **_**'Clan Line'**_

**SR Merchant Navy no.35018 **_**'British India Line'**_

**Metropolitan Railway E Class no.1 **_**'Met 1'**_** and his faithful Metropolitan Railway carriage **_**'Jubilee'**_

**GWR 5700 Class no.7752/London Transport no.L94 (who we named Pannier)**

**SR West Country no.34046 **_**'Braunton'**__**(mentioned)**_

**Some Human Characters**

Episode 74: A Bother and a Half

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** The Great British mainline was getting more and more visitors this summer meaning the Fat Director has had to schedule more trains. One such engine who had a big role to play in that schedule was Clan Line with her VSOE Luncheon/Pullman specials. Despite her old age, she was loving this because it gave her lots of hard work to do.

**Clan Line:** Come on you Pullman set of coaches, the Fat Director and the passengers all rely on me to be on time! I may indeed be old, thank you for pointing that out Olton Hall, but I'm also reliable so lets keep on going!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Whenever Clan Line arrived at a station finishing one journey, it was time for another one to begin.

**Clan Line:** Never mind. I mean, I always enjoy good long runs like these because they really give me the chance to stretch my wheels and show that I can still cut it on the mainline for my old age.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Even so, despite Clan Line's best efforts, with every journey she made, the more her parts were wearing. Once the Fat Director realised this, he decided that Clan Line needed a rest. One morning, he came to see her at her home, Stewarts Lane Depot.

**The Fat Director:** Clan Line, I've been told that your parts are beginning to wear out, so you'll be staying here at Stewarts Lane Depot to get those worn parts mended. Now normally in this situation, I'd get Braunton to take your place on those VSOE Pullman specials. However, because she has got her own work to do, I've decided to bring your sister British India Line onto the mainline to take your place. I hope your okay with that.

**Clan Line:** Oh I'm okay with your decision sir. I just fear that my dear sister will become rather boastful about this because she does tend to.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** And Clan Line was right. British India Line was delighted about being on the mainline. She really liked to show off her smart green paint and she was determined to do just as well as her sister. Unfortunately, this did indeed as Clan Line pointed out, make her rather boastful, like on this morning for example when she puffed into the yards where she came across Met 1 resting in a siding.

**British India Line:** _(proudly)_ You know little Met 1, I'm an important engine, everyone knows it! I'm as regular as clockwork, always on time and never late!

**Met 1:** Says you.

**British India Line:** Says me indeed, that was why the Fat Director brought me onto the mainline!

**The Fat Director:** That's Mr George Walkers to you British India Line!

**British India Line:** _(apologetically)_ Oops, sorry sir.

**The Fat Director:** You'd better be! _(he turns his attention to Met 1)_ Now then Met 1, just like British India Line's sister, your parts are also worn, meaning just like Clan Line, you'll have to go to the works to have them mended.

**Met 1:** _(worryingly)_ Can I take my faithful coach Jubilee sir?

**The Fat Director:** I'm afraid not Met 1, I mean what'll the passengers do without her eh?

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Met 1 puffed sadly away. Further down the yard, he saw Pannier at the water tower.

**Pannier:** Don't worry Met 1, I'll be looking after Jubilee until you get back.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Met 1 still wasn't happy though as he sadly puffed onwards and out of the yards. Soon, he was out onto the mainline, clanking as he chuffed along. Met 1's a little tank engine, meaning his tanks don't hold as much water as tender engines like me. At this point, he'd come a long way in his journey and he was now beginning to feel thirsty. Just then, he spotted a signal in the distance.

**Met 1:** Oh goodie! There's a station up ahead! I can have a nice long drink and a rest until British India Line has passed!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Met 1's driver thought so to. He got out of Met 1's cab and swung the hose of the water tower over Met 1's tanks. The water was just filling up the tanks when the signalman came up to them. He'd never seen Met 1 before. Met 1's driver tried to explain what was going on but the new signalman wouldn't listen.

**Signalman:** We must clear the line for British India Line and the VSOE Pullman special so you'll have to get more water at the next station, if it has a water tower that is!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Met 1 clanked sadly away. However, hurrying used up a lot of water and his tanks were soon empty. Poor Met 1 was out of steam and stranded out on the mainline.

**Met 1's Fireman:** We must warn British India Line about this situation!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Just then, he saw Pannier with Jubilee approaching in the opposite direction on the other track. He used his red flag to stop them.

**Met 1's Fireman:** Please take me back to the station Pannier, it's an emergency!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Jubilee hated leaving Met 1.

**Pannier:** Never mind Jubilee. You're taking the fireman to warn British India Line and that's a big help.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Jubilee felt much better. However, when British India Line heard the news, she was furious.

**British India Line:** _(furiously)_ I'm going to be late!

**Signalman:** _(admittingly)_ My fault, I didn't understand about Met 1.

**British India Line's Driver:** Now then British India Line, all this means of course that you'll have to push Met 1.

**British India Line:** _(furiously)_ What me, me, push Met 1 and pull my train to?!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Once the guard blew his whistle, British India Line, grumbling dreadfully, set off to find Met 1. British India Line was seething as she chuffed along the track. Geez, she really does need to calm down doesn't she eh?

**British India Line:** _(furiously)_ Enough with the fourth wall breaking Olton Hall you film starring, red painted bitch!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Oh that's just charming British India Line! Anyway, she soon found Met 1. She came up behind him and gave him a hard bump.

**British India Line:** _(angrily)_ Get on you!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** British India Line then pushed a now cheered up Met 1 down the track. British India Line had to work very hard indeed. By the time they reached the final station, British India Line was exhausted, her cheeks had turned bright red. Some children were on the platform.

**Child:** Coo, the VSOE Pullman special's late and it has got two engines! I don't think British India Line could do it on her own so Met 1 had to help her!

**Met 1:** _(whispers)_ Never mind British India Line, they're only joking.

**British India Line:** _(sarcastically and angrily)_ Ha-ha!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Met 1 just smiled, he didn't think British India Line would be boasting again anytime soon.

**And that's episode 74/episode 1 of T&FMLA series 4 done! Hope you enjoyed my parody of TTTE episode **_**'Time for Trouble'**_**. You may've noticed the changes I've made for this series in order to keep it going and I hope you don't mind them. Please review and I request criticism. And on that bombshell, it's time to end, thanks very much for reading, goodnight!**


	2. Brake Vans and Deputations

**Tonight - a train struggles up an incline, a brake van gets shattered and Tornado jumps.**

_**Tornado and Friends Mainline Adventures**_

Hello readers of this not very good and not so popular fanfic series, this' Olton Hall, aka Hogwarts Castle here and as you lot are here, I recently remembered another Thomas moment my friends had on the mainline. You see, this saga all started when the Fat Director planned to bring another engine onto the mainline. However, he made the mistake of accidentally bringing two engines onto the mainline: 249 Squadron and Bodmin. Both engines were keen to impress but the Fat Director was planning to send one of them back to heritage railway workings. How'd they get on? Well, we're about to find out as I narrate what turned out to be our versions of TTTE episodes _'Break Van'_ and _'The Deputation'_. Enjoy!

**This episode stars:**

**BR Battle of Britain no.34073 **_**'249 Squadron'**_

**SR West Country no.34016 **_**'Bodmin'**_

**LMS Black 5 no.44871 **_**'Sovereign'**_

**LNER Peppercorn A1 no.60163 **_**'Tornado'**_

**LMS Jubilee no.45699 **_**'Galatea'**_

**LNER A4 no.60007 **_**'Sir Nigel Gresley'**_

**LMS Black 5 no.45231 **_**'Sherwood Forester'**_

**LMS Jubilee no.45690 **_**'Leander'**_

**LNER A3 no.4472 **_**'Flying Scotsman'**_

**GWR 5700 Class no.9600 (who we named Swindon)**

**Our answer to the spiteful brake van**

**The Troublesome Trucks**

**The Fat Director**

**A Guard**

Episode 75: Brake Vans and Deputations

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** The Fat Director had made a bit of a mistake. He'd brought 249 Squadron AND Bodmin onto the mainline when he only planned to bring in one of them. Now he had to deal with both of them. The whole saga did indeed cause confusion. The Fat Director decided to give both of them a chance to impress, although he was still planning to send one of them back to heritage railway workings. One morning, there was a brake van in the yard that had taken a dislike to Bodmin. Things always went wrong when she had to take it out. Her trains were late and she was blamed; Bodmin was beginning to worry. 249 Squadron her friend was angry.

**249 Squadron:** You're a right old nuisance you are! It's to leave you behind I'll be wanting!

**Brake Van:** I'm afraid you can't do that because I'm essential.

**249 Squadron:** _(bursts out)_ Oh, are you really! You're nothing but a screeching and a noise when all's said and done! _(he backs up)_ Spite Bodmin will ya, take that! _(he charges forward and rams the van)_

**Brake Van:** _(cries)_ OW! OHH, OHH!

**249 Squadron:** There's more coming should you misbehave!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** _(chuckles)_ The van behaved better after that…until later that morning 249 Squadron had an accident. He was reversing into a siding. The rails were slippery and when his driver applied the brakes, his wheels just skidded along the slippery rails. He couldn't stop in time. He soon found himself crashing tender first through the buffers and into the signal box behind it.

**249 Squadron:** Ow, my arse!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** …yes. Anyway, when the Fat Director first heard of the news from the signalman of the damaged box, he arrived on the scene as soon as he possibly could and he was most annoyed.

**The Fat Director:** _(angrily)_ I'm disappointed 249 Squadron! I didn't expect such err, clumsiness from you! I had decided to send Bodmin back to the heritage railways and keep you!

**249 Squadron:** _(apologetically)_ I'm sorry sir.

**The Fat Director:** I should think so to because you've upset my arrangements! Now Sovereign will have to help with the goods work while you have your tender mended! Sovereign's not going to like that, especially since I've been having her hauling passenger trains over the recent weeks!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** The Fat Director was right. As Sovereign took charge of the goods trains, she was grumbling dreadfully.

**Sovereign:** _(seething)_ Damn you 249 Squadron, you're gonna pay for this!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Sovereign brought some trucks into the yard where Bodmin, Tornado and Galatea were resting.

**Bodmin:** Anyone would think that 249 Squadron had his accident on purpose. In fact, I heard a tale about an engine and some tar wagons.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Tornado and Galatea giggled to themselves.

**Tornado:** _(giggles)_ Oh I remember that day like it was yesterday.

**Galatea:** _(giggles)_ You looked even blacker than you do now Sovereign.

**Sovereign:** _(angrily)_ Shut the hell up, it's not funny!

**Bodmin:** Well, well, well, surely Sovereign it wasn't you. You didn't say.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Sovereign didn't say as she sloughed sulkily away to fetch another goods train. Once she had her second set of trucks, she took them out onto the mainline. Unfortunately for her, the spiteful brake van was at the back of the train and he was plotting something.

**Brake Van:** _(sniggers)_ She's cross so we'll try to make her crosser still.

**Trucks:** _(giggling to each other)_ Hold back!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Sovereign did her best but she was exhausted by the time she reached Bromsgrove station. Fortunately for her though, Bodmin was there.

**Sovereign:** _(panting)_ Help me up the Lickey Incline please Bodmin, these trucks are playing tricks.

**Bodmin:** We'll show them!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** So Bodmin reversed onto Sovereign's track and was coupled up to the back of the train. Working together, the duo charged at the fearsome Lickey Incline. Slowly but surely, the snorting engines forced the trucks up the incline. However, Sovereign was beginning to lose steam.

**Sovereign:** _(gasping)_ I can't do it, I can't do it!

**Bodmin:** _(shouts)_ Leave it to me!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** However, despite the best efforts from Bodmin, the train was just getting slower and slower. It eventually came to a stop and the engines wheels were just spinning. The guard was looking anxious at this point.

**Guard:** Go steady because the van's breaking!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** It was already too late though as he suddenly began to hear cracks from inside the brake van.

**Brake Van:** _(groans)_ Ooh, argh!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** The guard wisely jumped out of the brake van and legged it to safety. Under the strength and forcefulness of Bodmin, the brake van suddenly cracked open as Bodmin pushed her way into him. The brake van was soon in pieces.

**Bodmin:** Err…whoops.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** No one had been hurt but the guard had to go and call for help. Before long, Sherwood Forester arrived with the breakdown train to clear up the mess and the Fat Director was onboard and he wasn't happy.

**The Fat Director:** _(crossly)_ I might've known it'd be Bodmin!

**Sherwood Forester:** Bodmin was grand sir. My dear sister Sovereign had no steam left but Bodmin worked hard enough for three. I heard her further down the line.

**The Fat Director:** Two would've been enough. I want to be fair Bodmin…but, I don't know, I really don't know.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** The Fat Director was making up his mind about something. But that's another story…which continues right now! Once Bodmin and 249 Squadron were back at work, the snow had fallen and it was earlier and heavier than usual. Most engines hate snow as you'd expect, myself included in all honesty, however Bodmin and 249 Squadron were used to it. Coupled back to back with a van between their tenders and a snowplow on their fronts, they set off to work. They puffed backwards and forwards patrolling the line. As they puffed along, the snow would generally slip away easily. Although sometimes they found deeper drifts which they still managed to get through. Presently they came to a drift that was larger than most. They charged at it and were just backing for another try when…

POOP-POOP, HELP, HELP ME!

**249 Squadron:** Lords sakes Bodmin, it's Leander! Don't fret yourself Leander, wait a while and we'll have you out!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Leander was very grateful when 249 Squadron and Bodmin finally rescued her from her snowy grave. However, she saw that all wasn't well when she puffed into the yards. 249 Squadron and Bodmin were feeling glum.

**249 Squadron:** _(worryingly)_ The Fat Director will be returning soon.

**Bodmin:** _(sadly)_ Yeah and we know he's going to send us back to the heritage railways for sure.

**Tornado:** It's a shame.

**Sir Nigel Gresley:** A lot of nonsense about a broken signal box! Too many of those if you ask me!

**Sovereign:** That spiteful brake van to! Good riddance, that's what I say!

**Leander:** They were splendid in the snow. It just isn't fair.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** All the engines agreed that something must be done. None knew what though. Realising this, Tornado puffed away to see if she could find an engine to talk to about the situation. She soon found one in Flying Scotsman. Tornado filled him in on the situation.

**Flying Scotsman:** What you need Tornado is a deputation.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Flying Scotsman explained what that was. Tornado ran back to the other engines as quickly as she could.

**Tornado:** Flying Scotsman says we need a…a depostation!

**Sir Nigel Gresley:** Of course! The question is…

**Leander:** What IS a desperation?

**Tornado:** It's when engines tell the Fat Director something's wrong and ask him to put it right.

**Swindon:** _(thoughtfully)_ Did you say tell the Fat Director Tornado?

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** There was a long silence…_(yawn)_.

**Sir Nigel Gresley:** I propose that Tornado be our err…disputation.

**Tornado:** Me?! I can't!

**Leander:** Rubbish Tornado, it's easy!

**Sir Nigel Gresley:** That's settled then.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Poor Tornado wished it wasn't settled though as she puffed away. That afternoon, she was resting in a station siding when…

**The Fat Director:** Hello Tornado, it's nice to be back.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Tornado jumped by briefly shooting backwards.

**Tornado:** _(shocked)_ Uh, uh yes, yes sir, please sir!

**The Fat Director:** You look nervous Tornado, what's the matter?

**Tornado:** _(nervously)_ Please sir, they made me a desperation sir, to speak to you sir, I don't like it sir.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** The Fat Director pondered.

**The Fat Director:** _(pondering)_ Do you mean a deputation Tornado?

**Tornado:** Yes sir, please sir. It's 249 Squadron and Bodmin sir. They say sir, that if you send them back to heritage railway workings sir, they'll most likely not be used and then eventually turned into scrap sir! That would be dreadful sir! Please sir, don't send them away sir, I…

**The Fat Director:** Thank you Tornado, that'll do.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** The Fat Director spoke to the engines that afternoon.

**The Fat Director:** I had a…deputation. I understand your feelings however I simply don't approve of interference. _(pauses impressively)_ 249 Squadron and Bodmin, I hear that your work in the snow was good so you both shall have a new coat of paint.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** 249 Squadron and Bodmin were surprised.

**249 Squadron and Bodmin:** _(blow their whistles happily)_ Thank you sir! Does this mean for the both of us?

**The Fat Director:** It means…

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** The rest of the Fat Director's speech was drowned in a delighted chorus of cheers and whistles! 249 Squadron and Bodmin were BOTH on the mainline and they're here to stay…HOORAY, PEEP-PEEP! Oh wait, I can't whistle because I'm stuck in this museum…bollocks!

**And that's episode 75/episode 2 of T&FMLA Series 4 done! Hope you enjoyed my parodies of TTTE episodes **_**'Break Van'**_** and **_**'The Deputation'**_**. Please review and I request criticism. And on that bombshell, it's time to end, thanks very much for reading, goodnight!**


	3. Devlin Makes it Back

**Tonight - a diesel character makes his return, Prairie gets bumped from behind and some trucks go for a swim.**

_**Tornado and Friends Mainline Adventures**_

Hello readers of this not very good and not so popular fanfic series, this' Olton Hall, aka Hogwarts Castle here and for this episode, we see the return of our answer to Devious Diesel, Devlin. You see, the Fat Director had decided to bring him back so he could help Hawksworth and Prairie with the shunting work at the harbour. How did Hawksworth and Prairie cope with him, well find out now as I narrate what turned out to be our version of TTTE episode _'Diesel Does it Again'_. Enjoy!

**This episode stars:**

**GWR 9400 Class no.9466 (who we named Hawksworth)**

**GWR 4575 Class no.5521/London Transport no.L150 (who we named Prairie)**

**Devlin the Class 09 Shunting Diesel**

**The Troublesome Trucks**

**The Fat Director**

Episode 76: Devlin Makes it Back

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** The Fat Director had sent Hawksworth and Prairie to do some shunting work at the harbour over the next few days. The two little tank engines were really enjoying their new job as they took trucks to and from the quay. However one day, they were both feeling exhausted, the harbour was busier than ever with passengers, goods and cargo hastily arriving at and departing from the place. The Fat Director promised that another engine will be brought in to help them.

**Prairie:** Huh, it's about time eh Hawksworth?!

**Hawksworth:** I hear you Prairie! I mean because I ache so much, I can hardly get my wheels to move!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** The two friends impatiently waited for the engine to arrive. When he did, it came as a complete shock to them.

**Devlin:** _(squirms in his oily voice)_ Good morning Hawksworth and Prairie, it's nice to see you again.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Hawksworth and Prairie hadn't seen or worked with Devlin for a very long time so they couldn't believe it when they saw him.

**Hawksworth:** _(gasps)_ What're you doing here?!

**Devlin:** Your worthy fat…err, Mr George Walkers sent me. I hope you're pleased to see me because I'm to shunt some dreadfully tiresome trucks.

**Prairie:** _(suspiciously)_ Shunt them where?

**Devlin:** _(purrs)_ Where? Why from here to there. And again from there to here. Easy isn't it?

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** And with that, Devlin, keen to make himself quite clear, bumped some trucks hard.

**Trucks:** _(screams)_ Ooh!

**Devlin:** _(growls)_ Grrrr!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Hawksworth and Prairie were horrified, they didn't trust Devlin one bit. Therefore, they refused to work and remained in the harbour sheds. Meanwhile, the Fat Director was just about to enjoy his tea and ice bun.

**The Fat Director:** _(temptingly)_ Right then you little ice bun, it's time for you to go on a little adventure inside my gut.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Just then, the telephone rang.

**The Fat Director:** D'oh, bother! Why's that bloody telephone making a habit of always ringing when I'm in the middle of a meal?!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** _(giggles)_ Hehehe, he's not called the FAT Director for nothing you know.

**The Fat Director:** _(angrily)_ If you break the fourth wall once more Olton Hall, I'll have you sent for scrap!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** _(scared)_ Eep, sorry sir.

**The Fat Director:** You'd better be! Now where were we?

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** You were just about to answer the telephone.

**The Fat Director:** Oh yeah, thanks. _(he answers the telephone)_ Hello…oh, so there's trouble at the harbour yard eh…right, I'll be along right away.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** He hung up the telephone and exited his office en route for the harbour. Meanwhile, at the harbour, Devlin was working loudly and alone. Cargo was laying all across the quay and ships and passengers were delayed. Everyone was complaining about the running of the harbour. Hawksworth and Prairie were still sulking in their shed by the time the Fat Director arrived.

**The Fat Director:** _(demandingly)_ What's all this?!

**Prairie:** Err, we're on strike sir!

**Hawksworth:** Yes! Beg pardon sir but we refuse to work with Devlin sir! _(quietly and hurtfully)_ You said you'd sent him packing sir.

**The Fat Director:** I had to give Devlin and second chance! I'm trying to help you by bringing Devlin here! Now you two must help me! Besides, he was the only engine available! Now get back to work and shut the mouths of those complaining passengers!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Hawksworth and Prairie puffed sadly back to work where they did indeed shut the mouths of those complaining passengers. They still weren't happy though. The next morning, things got no better. Devlin's driver hadn't applied his brakes on properly and Devlin then started to roll forward. With a loud BUMP, he went straight into Prairie. Poor Prairie had an awful fright as her eyes spun wildly from the impact.

**Devlin:** _(scowls)_ Wake up there Prairie, you've got work to do.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** As Prairie puffed crossly away, Devlin didn't even say he was sorry to her. Even Hawksworth was angry as he'd just watched this scene unveil before him. That afternoon, Devlin bumped some trucks so hard that some cargo dropped out of the trucks and went everywhere along the ground. Hawksworth and Prairie watched this and they weren't happy.

**Prairie:** _(gasps)_ What'll the Fat Director say?

**Hawksworth:** He's not going to like it.

**Devlin:** So who's going to tell him I wonder? Maybe two little goody-goody tell-tales like you two I suppose.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Hawksworth and Prairie didn't want to be two little goody-goody tell-tales so they said nothing. Devlin though, thinking he could get away with his bad behaviour was ruder than ever! Bloody hell, he's even worse than Justin Bieber! The next day, Devlin was shunting trucks full of china clay. He banged the trucks hard into the buffers, however the buffers weren't secure! The silly trucks were sunk.

**Devlin:** Err…whoops.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** By the time the Fat Director had first heard the news, it was night time once he'd arrived. By then, the workmen, using their cranes, had managed to fish the trucks out of the sea. However, the china clay had been lost. The Fat Director was very cross indeed as he spoke severely to Devlin.

**The Fat Director:** _(severely)_ Things worked much better here before you arrived so I shall not be inviting you back! _(he turns his attention to Hawksworth and Prairie)_ Now then Hawksworth and Prairie, I hope you two won't mind having to handle the work by yourselves again.

**Hawksworth and Prairie:** _(happily)_ Oh sir, yes please sir!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Whistling cheerfully, Hawksworth and Prairie puffed straight back to work, while Devlin sulked slowly away. And just like him being sent away, I hope Justin Bieber goes to prison because that's what the bloody heartless, smug, spoilt, annoying, retarded, selfish, ugly, cowardly, lesbian sounding, no balls bastard needs!

**And that's episode 76/episode 3 of T&FMLA Series 4 done! Hope you enjoyed my parody of TTTE episode **_**'Diesel Does it Again'**_** Please review, I request criticism and I apologise if it's a bit short. And on that bombshell, it's time to end, thanks very much for reading, goodnight!**


	4. Back All!

**Tonight - we have another runaway, the narrator insults another engine and a brake van crashes into a church of all places.**

_**Tornado and Friends Mainline Adventures**_

Hello readers of this not very good and not so popular fanfic series, this' Olton Hall, aka Hogwarts Castle here and we'll be spending this episode with our brake van friend Will. Now, Will's very similar to that TTTE character Toad, both being brake vans and all. The only difference's that while Toad's a GWR brake van, Will's a BR brake van. And you know something, Will once shared the exact same ambition as Toad…of wanting to go forwards. One day though, those troublesome trucks of ours decided to make that very wish come true. How did Will get on, well find out now as I narrate what turned out to be our version of TTTE episode _'Busy Going Backwards'_. Enjoy!

**This episode stars:**

**Will the BR Brake Van**

**BR Standard Class 4 2-6-0 no.76079 **_**'Pocket Rocket'**_

**BR Standard Class 7 Britannia no.70013 **_**'Oliver Cromwell'**_

**BR Standard Class 4 4-6-0 no.75029 **_**'The Green Knight'**_

**BR Standard Class 7 Britannia no.70000 **_**'Britannia'**_

**The Troublesome Trucks**

**A Signalman and a Stationmaster**

Episode 77: Back All!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Will the BR brake van was feeling sad. Everywhere he looked he could see engines, coaches and trucks moving steadily forwards. They were all looking confident and cheerful. One day, Will decided to talk to his friend Pocket Rocket about how he was feeling. Oliver Cromwell was also in on the conversation.

**Will:** I'm always going backwards Ms Pocket Rocket. I have forward thinking views. I could be a leader if you know what I mean.

**Oliver Cromwell:** You can't be a leader without a train to follow you and you don't have a train!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** This made Will feel even sadder still but Pocket Rocket wanted to help.

**Pocket Rocket:** You're a really useful brake van Will. You help me brake and you keep my trucks in order when we go down hills and inclines.

**Will:** I know Ms Pocket Rocket but it would be so exciting to go forwards for a change instead of always seeing things sliding away from me.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** The trucks were listening in on their conversation and they were all very cross with Will.

**Trucks:** Who's he to start complaining! He's lucky to be able to look after us! Lets teach him a lesson!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Pocket Rocket and Will heard nothing though as Pocket Rocket began collecting her trucks. With all the trucks collected and coupled up and with Will coupled up at the back of the train, Pocket Rocket whistled out of the yard. Out on the mainline, Pocket Rocket was making good time as she politely whistled to all her friends as they passed her. The trucks meanwhile were plotting how they were gonna teach Will a lesson. They reached an agreement that they were going to carry out their plan on the next hill. When they reach that hill, Pocket Rocket began to climb. When she was nearly at the top, the trucks carried out their tricks.

**Trucks:** Ready, steady, go!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** They then jerked at the coupling linking Pocket Rocket with the first trucks when then broke. Pocket Rocket gasped as she suddenly found herself shooting forward as the trucks began to push a shocked Will down the hill.

**Trucks:** _(yells)_ We're making your wish come true Will! Follow the leader!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Will was still in a state of shock so he didn't know what to think and he couldn't ask the guard to apply his brakes because he'd jumped clear.

**Trucks:** _(screams)_ Faster, faster, as fast as you want!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Back at the hill, Pocket Rocket had somehow managed to turn around and was now in hot pursuit of the runaway. Suddenly though Will was beginning to find this new ride rather enjoyable. However the smile was quickly wiped off of his face because a level crossing was up ahead and the gates were closed. Will shut his eyes as he couldn't stop himself from barging through the gates, badly damaging them. Worse still Will now realised he was on the wrong track because their, right in front of him in the siding taking on water, was Oliver Cromwell. Fortunately though, the signalman changed the points just in time. Oliver Cromwell was very relieved that he hadn't been hit. The trucks were loving this unsurprisingly.

**Trucks:** _(cries)_ On, on, faster!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Just then, as Will raced through a station, he suddenly saw The Green Knight up ahead pulling a long slow goods train.

**Will:** _(wails)_ Yikes! Help, save me!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** A quick thinking shunter did as he changed the points for Will just in time. Then he changed the points back again so a shocked Green Knight could steam by.

**The Green Knight:** _(exclaims)_ What the fuck was that?!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Meanwhile, the signalman was warning the stationmaster at the next station.

**Signalman:** There's a runaway coming!

**Stationmaster:** We'll send them into the sidings!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Now then, back with Will…

**Will:** _(calls)_ Help, help!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** _(annoyed)_ Oh thanks a lot for interrupting me you runaway idiot! Anyway, Will raced towards the station and found himself diverted into its sidings. He then saw some buffers up ahead.

**Will:** _(relieved)_ Oh phew, those buffers will stop me.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Unfortunately though the points to the buffers weren't set, so now Will was back to where he was before being diverted.

**Will:** _(cries)_ Oh no, I'm back on the mainline!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Meanwhile, Pocket Rocket was racing to the rescue. She'd raced past some workmen who were busy mending the gates that Will had broke and she was now approaching the first station.

**Pocket Rocket:** I must catch Will, I must!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Speaking of Will, he was now shooting straight past Britannia who was resting in a siding.

**Britannia:** _(exclaims while blowing whistle alarmingly)_ What in the name of all that's holy is going on?!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** _(annoyed)_ Well isn't it rather obvious Britannia?! Anyway, there was danger up ahead. Some other workmen were working on a bridge but they'd been warned the runaway Will and his trucks. Will rounded the nearest bend and gasped when he saw the workmen up ahead. The workmen however had already switched the points meaning Will had now been diverted into a siding. Will raced into the siding and soon found himself crashing into an old and disused church.

**Will:** _(relieved)_ Ooh, stopped at last.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** The workmen was thankful that Will was okay and they were happy that Will had saved them a job because that church needed knocking down anyway. Just then, they heard a whistle and saw Pocket Rocket arriving on the scene. When Pocket Rocket saw Will in the situation he was in she could only smile.

**Pocket Rocket:** _(smiles)_ Well churches are supposed to bring things like Will aren't they?

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** That evening, Will had been rescued and was brought back to the yards where he spoke to Pocket Rocket.

**Will:** _(apologetically)_ I'm sorry Ms Pocket Rocket if I caused you any embarrassment.

**Pocket Rocket:** Oh that's alright Will. So tell me, what did you think of going forwards?

**Will:** Well it was actually rather enjoyable. But you know something, from now on I'll be happy to look forward to the future, busy going backwards, so to speak.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** And with that, the two friends smiled.

**And that's episode 77/episode 4 of T&FMLA Series 4 done! Hope you enjoyed my parody of TTTE episode **_**'Busy Going Backwards'**_**. Please review, I request criticism and I apologise if it's a bit short. And on that bombshell, it's time to end, thanks very much for reading, goodnight!**


	5. One Good Turn and Heroes

**Tonight - we have another all diesel episode, two BFFs have a falling out and Alycidon is made very late indeed.**

_**Tornado and Friends Mainline Adventures**_

Hello readers of this not very good and not so popular fanfic series, this' Olton Hall, aka Hogwarts Castle here and for today's episode, we're going to be focussing on our answer to Bill and Ben, the shunting diesel BFFs Korra and Claire. These two can cause trouble for all of us when they feel like it but they're actually nicer than initially thought, they're just a bit cheeky, boastful and rather thoughtless at times, that's all. For this episode though, they'd been sent to do some…well, shunting, helping our fellow diesel friend Raymond where the troublesome duo had a little bit of a falling out. However, after making up, they had to rescue some workmen from a disaster. How'd they get on, well find out as I narrate what turned out to be our versions of TTTE episodes _'One Good Turn'_ and _'Heroes'_. Enjoy!

**This episode stars:**

**Korra the Class 11 Shunting Diesel and her Driver**

**Claire the Class 12 Shunting Diesel**

**Raymond the Class 60 Diesel**

**Class 52 Western Diesel no.D1015 **_**'Western Champion'**_

**Class 55 Deltic Diesel no.D9009 **_**'Alycidon'**_

**The Troublesome Trucks**

**The Fat Director**

**A Workman**

**A Foreman**

**A Quarry Master**

Episode 78: One Good Turn and Heroes

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Korra and Claire have turned out to be two of the most mischievous engines working on the Fat Director's mainline. They're often kept busy pushing and pulling trucks about all the various yards all across the mainline. They like to have fun together which means they often do tend to play tricks on the workmen. Sometimes though, their teasing ways can get them into trouble. One morning, the Fat Director came to see them.

**The Fat Director:** Some important goods have arrived in the next yard down the line Korra and Claire so I need you to help the other engines.

**Korra and Claire:** Oh yes sir, of course!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** They set off happily on their important mission. At the next yard, Raymond was just resting when he suddenly heard a pair of familiar horns.

**Raymond:** _(sighs)_ Hmm, hear comes trouble.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Korra and Claire rolled up alongside him.

**Korra:** _(teasingly)_ The Fat Director told us that you were tired so he has asked us to take all your trucks for you!

**Raymond:** _(chuckles)_ You two never stop do you but I'm wise to your pranks and we do indeed need your help here.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** The two BFFs were soon kept busy pushing and pulling the heavy trucks into place. They were having loads of fun. At last though, the days work was done. The BFFs had now become excited because they were going to use the turntable for the first time in…well a very long time really. Korra rolled onto the turntable first.

**Korra:** _(shrieks)_ This' fun!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** She really didn't want to move of the turntable at all. However, the ride was short lived because the foreman then stopped it.

**Foreman:** _(orders)_ Please make way for the other engines!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Korra sadly did so but unfortunately the foreman had accidentally stopped the turntable in the wrong place. Korra was now on the wrong track and there was Claire rolling directly towards her. The two diesel engines came to a grinding halt, bumping their front buffers against one another. They gazed grimly at each other.

**Korra:** I was here first!

**Claire:** _(protests)_ But you're in my way so you'll have to back up again!

**Korra:** I won't!

**Claire:** You will!

**Korra:** I won't!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Just then, the Fat Director arrived on the scene in order to stop the noise.

**The Fat Director:** Listen you two, if you don't behave, I shall not be allowing you both here again!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** However, the next day, Claire was still grumbling as she rolled up alongside Raymond.

**Claire:** _(grumbles)_ That Korra, imagine getting in my way on the turntable, she's a really silly engine!

**Raymond:** _(sighs)_ The way I heard it, it sounded like you were both to blame.

**Claire:** Huh, you must've heard it all wrong!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** The two shunting diesels were grumbling about each other all day. Even kind Western Champion lost patience.

**Western Champion:** All this grumbling spreads bad atmosphere in the yard.

**Raymond:** You're quite right Western Champion and that's why I've come up with a plan!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Raymond whispered his plan to Western Champion who smiled in agreement. Raymond's driver then explained the plan to the Fat Director who also agreed to it.

**The Fat Director:** I'll start making arrangements straight away.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** The plan was put into operation the next morning when the Fat Director called Korra and Claire into the yard.

**The Fat Director:** Now listen up you two, Raymond's taking a special train to the harbour, meaning he has had to leave his regular heavy goods train waiting on the siding. You two can pull that heavy goods train together.

**Korra:** _(protests)_ But…

**Claire:** _(protests)_ But…

**The Fat Director:** Good, I knew I could rely on you two.

**Claire:** _(huffily)_ I'll take the train myself!

**Korra:** Go right ahead.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Later that day, Claire was coupled up to the heavy goods train. However, the train proved to be too heavy for her to move alone as her wheels just spun and spun. To make matters worse, Korra was watching.

**Korra:** _(teasingly)_ Well go on then.

**Claire:** I can't!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Then suddenly, as Claire stopped trying, the two shunting diesels laughed.

**Korra:** I don't think we'll take turns this time Claire, I think we'd better pull together.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Claire was delighted as Korra was coupled up in front. It felt good to be helping each other and it was because of this that they got the heavy goods train delivered safely. Best of all though, it was good to be friends again. The next morning, the BFFs were working at the quarry doing their usual stick of pushing and pulling trucks into their proper places. Now as you readers may've established by now, the BFFs were cheeky and loved playing tricks. They were also growing restless though.

**Claire:** Listen Korra, can you hear something?

**Korra:** What sort of something?

**Claire:** Something different.

**Korra:** I can't hear anything different.

**Claire:** _(huffs)_ Exactly! Everything's the same, sounds the same and looks the same so what we need's a surprise!

**Korra:** Surprise what?

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Before Claire could answer though, the quarry master arrived.

**Quarry Master:** Korra and Claire, I've just received an urgent message from the Fat Director. He wants you both to go to the station near the harbour.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** So Korra and Claire set off for the station near the harbour. While heading en route there, they were wondering what the Fat Director would be wanting them for.

**Korra:** _(anxiously)_ I wonder what we've done wrong this time?

**Claire:** It must be you.

**Korra:** _(exclaims)_ Why me?! I've not done anything!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** They soon arrived where they found the Fat Director waiting for them.

**The Fat Director:** Western Champion's taking some children on a special trip today so I want you two to go to the station and look after trucks there.

**Korra and Claire:** We'll do our best sir!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** The duo headed for the station yard. When they arrived, they found Alycidon already there and he spoke severely to them.

**Alycidon:** _(severely)_ You two must behave here because you're on the mainline now.

**Claire:** _(giggles)_ Actually Alycidon, when we saw you, we thought this was the scrap yard.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Alycidon was cross upon hearing this.

**Alycidon:** _(crossly)_ Oh yeah, very clever I must say! Listen, just make sure that you get my coaches ready for my evening train you couple of little square boxes on wheels!

**Korra and Claire:** _(teasingly)_ Ooh!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** And with that, Alycidon just fumed away. Korra and Claire were now busily shunting the trucks.

**Korra and Claire:** This' easy because we know all about trucks!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** However, I'm afraid to say that they didn't as they biffed some trucks hard.

**Trucks:** No need for that! We'll show you around, we want to help!

**Korra and Claire:** Thank you very much.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** The trucks just giggled as they began their tricks. By the time evening came, the yard was in a dreadful muddle because the BFFs had let the trucks tell them where to put things. The place was now under so much confusion. That night, Alycidon and the passengers were waiting impatiently outside the station while Korra and Claire were doing their best to sort things out. They soon had the coaches ready and Alycidon was coupled up to them. However, by the time all the passengers were onboard and he was able to leave, it was very late indeed. The next morning, Korra and Claire were working at the quarry again. Just then, they heard a strange noise.

**Korra:** _(gasps)_ That's a strange noise. I've never heard a noise like that before.

**Korra's Driver:** _(whispers nervously)_ I have and it sounds like a rockslide to me.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Suddenly they heard an alarm going off.

**Quarry Master:** _(shouts)_ Danger, clear the quarry!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** The workmen were now all scrambling into Korra and Claire's trucks.

**Korra and Claire:** Thank goodness we're here!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** More rocks were falling so they had to get the workmen out of here now! They were just whirring out of the quarry when…

**Workman:** Help, wait for me!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Well, after that cry, need I say more about it other than the fact that Claire waited as the workman climbed quickly onboard. With that last workman inside the truck, Claire hastily followed Korra out of the quarry. The two escaped the place just in time. The rocks were now tumbling everywhere, littering the track and destroying buildings. Eventually though, the rockslide came to its conclusion. Thankfully everyone was safe, however, as Korra and Claire could easily see, rubble was laying all around.

**Korra:** Oh dear. This wasn't our fault but I hope the Fat Director will understand.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** And indeed he did. He arrived on the scene that afternoon with Western Champion.

**The Fat Director:** Korra and Claire, you still have quite a lot of things to learn about trucks haven't you? However, you acted quickly and bravely in an emergency so, three cheers for Korra and Claire our heroes! Hip hip, hooray, hooray, hooray!

**Korra:** Ooh thank you sir! Being called heroes well it's, it's…

**Claire:** _(laughs)_ It's a really nice surprise.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** And that's that folks! And what do you know, we managed to go through a single episode of the fourth series without mentioning a single swear word, thank you Mr Writer you bastard! _(BEEP!)_ Oh come on, just let me have that one!

**And that's episode 78/episode 5 of T&FMLA Series 4 done! Hope you enjoyed my parodies of TTTE episodes **_**'One Good Turn'**_** and **_**'Heroes'**_**. Please review and I request criticism. And on that bombshell, it's time to end, thanks very much for reading, goodnight!**


	6. Old Snail

**Tonight - Roy 'Korky' Green's feeling all cheerful, Tangmere becomes the dirty lady in a whole new way and a workmen's hut gets burnt down.**

_**Tornado and Friends Mainline Adventures**_

Hello readers of this not very good and not so popular fanfic series, this' Olton Hall, aka Hogwarts Castle here and as we all know, fire's mans oldest foe. That phrase also works on females as well, especially if your name's Tangmere. Meanwhile, my Black 5 friends Lancashire Fusilier and Roy 'Korky' Green discovered an old electric powered coach looking thing. What did they do with it, well find out now as I narrate what turned out to be our version of TTTE episode _'Thomas, Percy and Old Slow Coach'_. Enjoy!

**This episode stars:**

**LMS Black 5 no.45407 **_**'Lancashire Fusilier'**_

**LMS Black 5 no.45212 **_**'Roy 'Korky' Green'**_

**SR Battle of Britain no.34067 **_**'Tangmere'**_

**Metropolitan Railway Electric Locomotive no.12 **_**'Sarah Siddons'**_

**The Fire Service**

**The 3 Steam Engines Drivers**

**A Yard Manager**

**A Guard**

**A Foreman**

**The Fat Director**

Episode 79: Old Snail

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** One day, Tangmere, Lancashire Fusilier and Roy 'Korky' Green were looking up at the early morning sky which looked absolutely beautiful…but it's no where near as good looking as me right?

**Lancashire Fusilier:** _(happily)_ Everyone's so much happier when the spring time comes.

**Tangmere:** _(grumbles)_ Everyone except the Fat Director because he's seemingly working us harder than ever. And I'll tell you this boys, I'm really starting to get tired of these coastal runs.

**Roy 'Korky' Green:** He just wants everything to be ready for the holidays. Anyway, salty air makes me all cheerful in my smoke box.

**Tangmere:** _(snorts)_ Pah! It's the countryside that really gets me fired up because it's the only place to be!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** And with that, Tangmere puffed away to collect some fuel trucks from the docks. Later that morning, Lancashire Fusilier and Roy 'Korky' Green brought some empty trucks into the scrap yard. As they pushed their trucks into a siding, they saw an old Metropolitan Railway Electric Locomotive and she was looking very miserable.

**Roy 'Korky' Green:** Hello there, what're you doing here?

**Sarah Siddons:** _(miserably)_ My name's Sarah Siddons and I was told that I'm not very useful anymore. Now I've only got mice scurrying around my insides.

**Lancashire Fusilier:** Well you may look dusty but you look in perfect shape.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Just then, the yard manager walked up to them.

**Yard Manager:** Come along you two Black 5's because I've got some trucks for you both to take away.

**Roy 'Korky' Green's Driver:** Excuse me, can you tell us what you know about this electric engine?

**Yard Manager:** Sarah Siddons, she has been here for quite a while now. We're gonna break her up once we find the time.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Lancashire Fusilier and Roy 'Korky' Green were most dismayed upon hearing this saddening news.

**Lancashire Fusilier:** We'll try and help you.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** However, Lancashire Fusilier didn't know how and neither did Roy 'Korky' Green. Meanwhile, although Tangmere was now chuffing through the countryside, she still wasn't happy.

**Tangmere:** _(angrily)_ I told that fatso of a controller that I'm too old and ladylike to take goods trains but what does he do, he gives me a job that sees me haul a train of fuel tankers! This' just ridiculous, thanks a lot you fat twat, I'm totally going to run you over next time I see you!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** However, unbeknownst to Tangmere, she was heading for trouble because behind her, one of the fuel trucks was leaking. Then suddenly, it burst into flames. When Tangmere realised what had happened, she sped up and was now racing alarmingly along the line scared out of her wheels.

**Tangmere:** _(cries)_ HELP!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** When Tangmere reached the nearest siding, she was quickly uncoupled and she then puffed up to the sidings end but her dark green paint was smothered in soot. As the trucks burnt, her driver raised the alarm by calling the fire service.

**Tangmere's Driver:** It's fuel and it's dangerous!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** As Lancashire Fusilier and Roy 'Korky' Green approached the junction with their trucks full of scrap, none of which associated with any steam engines, they saw the smoke and a guard waving a red flag.

**Guard:** _(calls)_ Sparks from Tangmere has set the fuel trucks a blaze! The fire brigade have got things under control but it's quite a mess!

**Roy 'Korky' Green:** You said the countryside run got you all fired up Tangmere, but I didn't think you meant it in this way!

**Tangmere:** _(snorts)_ Pah! It was the stupid trucks fault, not mine!

**Lancashire Fusilier:** Also Mrs Dirty Lady, have you seen the state of your paintwork?

**Tangmere:** _(shouts)_ Will you shut the bloody hell up!

**Fireman:** _(calls to the Black 5 brothers)_ Okay guys, it's safe to proceed now.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** With a small blow of their whistles, Lancashire Fusilier and Roy 'Korky' Green puffed carefully past but they were now feeling rather sorry for Tangmere. It wasn't long before the Black 5 brothers reached their destination where their truck loads of scrap were needed. Once the trucks were dropped off, they had stopped to take on more water. Their long drinks had just finished when they suddenly heard the sound of a fire alarm. They wondered what the commotion was about.

**Lancashire Fusilier:** What's the matter?

**Lancashire Fusilier's Driver:** It's another fire, this time at a workmen's hut! Come on you two, we'd better see what we can do!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** The Black 5 brothers quickly puffed as close as they could possibly go to the scene of the fire. They watched as the firemen arrived on the scene in their fire engines with their sirens waling. However, there was a big problem the firemen had and one of them explained it to the engines.

**Fireman:** _(cries)_ We're completely out of water! We can't use seawater because it clogs our works! We'll just have to let that building burn!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Well these firemen aren't very good as being firemen aren't they? I mean, why don't you just come up with a fire engine that can run on the road AND the rails, or maybe fit a steam engine with water cannons!…Err, then Lancashire Fusilier had an idea.

**Lancashire Fusilier:** Why don't you use the water in our tanks, we've just refilled them!

**Roy 'Korky' Green:** Yes, quickly now!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** The firemen wasted little time as they planted their hoses into the water tanks of the Black 5 brothers. The hoses were soon sucking out the water and once all the water was collected, the hoses then squirted the water on the burning hut.

**The Black 5 Brothers Drivers:** You both are very clever engines.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Eventually, the fire was put out but the hut where the workmen lived was destroyed.

**Foreman:** It looks like we're going to have to build a new hut for all you workmen. I just hope you Black 5 brothers can help us.

**Lancashire Fusilier:** Oh yes of course we can help.

**Roy 'Korky' Green:** Hey, why don't we get Sarah Siddons to help out as well, she can prove to everyone that she can still be really useful.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Everyone thought that was a great idea so the foreman quickly telephoned the Fat Director about it.

**The Fat Director:** Very well then. Sarah Siddons will be spic and span and working again by the time she arrives. Also, if she does prove to be really useful, I might have a surprise for her.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Everyone only had to wait for a couple of hours before Sarah Siddons arrived and she looked stunning. Her new paintwork gleamed in the sunshine and she never felt so good in all her life.

**Sarah Siddons:** _(happily)_ I can't thank you guys enough for giving me this chance! I promise I'll do my best for all of you!

**Lancashire Fusilier:** That's good to know Sarah Siddons.

**Roy 'Korky' Green:** Now what're we waiting for? Lets get going!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Sarah Siddons fulfilled her promise. She worked hard bringing in and taking away trucks as the new hut for the workmen started to take shape and everyone was most impressed. A few days later, the new hut was finished and the Fat Director was brought in to inspect it. He was very pleased.

**The Fat Director:** Well done everyone, you all got this new hut finished ahead of schedule! _(he turns his attention to Sarah Siddons)_ As for you Sarah Siddons, it seems to me you have indeed been working hard and played a big part in this project. Therefore I think you deserve your new job which's to work on the London Underground.

**Sarah Siddons:** _(gasps)_ The London Underground?! Oh thank you sir, I've always wanted to work down there!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Sarah Siddons was now as happy as can be working on the London Underground as she picked up and dropped off passengers with her new coaches and everyone thought she was really useful indeed.

**And that's episode 79/episode 6 of T&FMLA Series 4 done! Hope you enjoyed my parody of TTTE episode **_**'Thomas, Percy and Old Slow Coach'**_**. Please review, I request criticism and I apologise if it's a bit short. And on that bombshell, it's time to end, thanks very much for reading, goodnight!**


	7. The Christmas Party of Tornado

**Tonight - some coaches get sworn at, some engines have been polished and Tornado's in pain **_**(Tornado: It hurts like bloody buggery I tell you!)**_**.**

_**Tornado and Friends Mainline Adventures**_

Hello readers of this not very good and not so popular fanfic series, this' Olton Hall, aka Hogwarts Castle here and if there's one time of the year that I love the most, it's Christmas. Oh yes, I love Christmas. All the snow, all the decorations, it's all so magical and beautiful. In fact, I remember when young Tornado planned a surprise party for one of her human friends, who ironically enough was named Mrs Friend. This person turned out to be our version of Mrs Kyndley. How'd Tornado surprise party plans get on despite all the snow? Well, find out now as I narrate what turned out to be our version of TTTE episode _'Thomas' Christmas Party'_. Enjoy!

**This episode stars:**

**LNER Peppercorn A1 no.60163 **_**'Tornado'**_

**LNER A4 no.4464 **_**'Bittern'**_

**SR N15 King Arthur no.(30)777 **_**'Sir Lamiel'**_

**SR West Country no.34046 **_**'Braunton'**_

**LNER B1 no.61264 (who we named Thompson)**

**SR S15 no.(30)825 (who we named Maunsell)**

**GWR Castle no.7029 **_**'Clun Castle'**_

**Mrs Friend**

**The Fat Director**

**Michelle the Tractor**

**Talking Coaches**

Episode 80: The Christmas Party of Tornado

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** It was Christmas in Great Britain and all the engines were working hard, whether it was bringing people or parcels up and down the mainline. Everyone was happy…well, almost everyone because on this day, the coaches Tornado was hauling were all complaining.

**Coaches:** _(groaning)_ It's always the same before Christmas! We feel so full, we feel so full!

**Tornado:** Oh come on you bunch of moaning bitches! Where's your festive spirit? I mean, Christmas day's almost here!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** On the route Tornado was taking, further down the line was a lonely little cottage by the side of the track, which often had a familiar figure waving to them. As Tornado approached, she saw the person waving to her.

**Tornado:** _(whistles)_ It's Mrs Friend. PEEP-PEEP, happy Christmas!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Tornado always felt better for seeing her because she knew that Christmas just wouldn't be Christmas without Mrs Friend. When work was over, Tornado went to rest in the siding. She found some of her friends already there and all of their coats had been polished.

**Bittern:** Huh, just look at us. Your driver will have to work fast to get you as smart as us young Tornado.

**Tornado:** Never mind that, I've got something important to say. Do you guys realise its been a whole year since Mrs Friend saved us from a nasty accident. You remember when she was ill in bed and…

**Sir Lamiel:** Yes of course. You told us how she waved her red dressing gown out of her window in order to warn you about a landslide ahead.

**Braunton:** And you and Clun Castle gave her presents. And the Fat Director sent her to Bournemouth to get better.

**Thompson:** But…

**Maunsell:** The rest of us have never thanked her properly.

**Tornado:** Exactly! So now I think we should all give her a special Christmas party.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Everyone was getting very excited and the engines drivers all felt sure that the Fat Director would agree, as indeed he did. The engines were all busy making plans and blowing their whistles happily when silence fell…the Fat Director had arrived and he had some bad news.

**The Fat Director:** The weathers changed badly and as a result, Mrs Friend has been snowed up. Clun Castle says that she'll be able to help rescue her. You must help out to Tornado because there's no party unless you do.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Tornado then saw some workmen bringing and then attaching her snowplow. Tornado hated snow but she said bravely…

**Tornado:** _(bravely)_ I'll try sir. We must rescue her, we must!

**The Fat Director:** There's a good engine, you and Clun Castle will manage splendidly.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** With the snowplow attached, Tornado steamed off to the rescue. The snowplow felt very uncomfortable, as it usually did, but Tornado was determined to succeed in this mission. Further down the line, she met up with Clun Castle who was waiting for her.

**Clun Castle:** Ah, there you are Tornado. I've got the carriage full of workmen armed with shovels and I see you've got your snowplow fitted.

**Tornado:** _(crossly)_ Yes indeed I do and it hurts like bloody buggery I tell you!

**Clun Castle:** Oh well, never mind. So shall we get going?

**Tornado:** Alright lets get on with it because the sooner I can get this snowplow off, the better.

**Clun Castle:** Please Tornado, lead the way.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** So Tornado puffed away with Clun Castle following. En route for Mrs Friend's cottage, Tornado charged at the snowdrifts fiercely. Sometimes she swept them aside but sometimes they stuck fast and the workmen inside Clun Castle's carriage had to use their shovels to loosen them so that Tornado could keep right on going. Eventually, they reached the cutting near the cottage where they found that they could go no further because the snowdrift in front of them was too big and too deep to get through. They looked around the area.

**Clun Castle:** _(exclaims)_ Geez Tornado, look at all that snow!

**Tornado:** I know Clun Castle.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Tornado then decided to whistle to tell Mrs Friend that she and Clun Castle had arrived.

**Tornado:** _(whistles)_ PEEP-PEEP-PEEP! Here we are!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** And answering wave from Mrs Friend came from an upstairs window. Just then, Tornado heard a familiar sound and the souce of it came out from behind the cottage.

**Tornado:** That's Michelle, she has come to help to.

**Michelle:** Yes indeed I have Tornado.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Using her own snowplow, Michelle was helping the workmen clear away the snow around the cottage and create a path from the cottage to the railway line safely. At long last, the rescue mission was complete. Braunton arrived and took away Clun Castle's carriage with the tired workmen inside, taking them home. Michelle said goodbye to Mrs Friend and promised to take care of her cottage as she watched Mrs Friend carefully make her way down the path and step into Tornado's cab. With Mrs Friend onboard, Tornado and Clun Castle set off for the National Railway Museum, which was where the party was being held. The engines made good time because no more snow had fallen. However, when they arrived at the Museum, it was completely blacked out. If Tornado had a heart, it would've sunk at that moment. Suddenly, all the lights came on, what a marvellous sight awaited Mrs Friend.

**The Fat Director:** Well done Tornado and Clun Castle, you've done a great job.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Mrs Friend especially thanked those engines that helped her today.

**Mrs Friend:** Tornado and Clun Castle are both good friends of mine. _(Tornado and Clun Castle spin their eyes delightfully)_ And now Braunton, you're my friend to.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Braunton was very pleased upon hearing this.

**Braunton:** _(calls)_ Three cheers for Mrs Friend!

**All the Engines:** _(whistles)_ PEEP-PEEP-PEEP! We wish you a merry Christmas, we wish you a merry Christmas, we wish you a merry Christmas and a happy new year!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Tornado the Young Engine and her friends thought it was the best Christmas ever and Mrs Friend couldn't think of nowhere that she would rather live than Great Britain where she could talk to her friends on the rails. And you know something, who cares if this episode was uploaded at the beginning of August instead of actually being uploaded at Christmas time, our writer just can't be asked to wait that long so he decided to just upload this episode now!

**And that's episode 80/episode 7 of T&FMLA Series 4 done! Hope you enjoyed my parody of TTTE episode **_**'Thomas' Christmas Party'**_**. Please review, I request criticism and I apologise of it's a bit short. And on that bombshell, it's time to end, thanks very much for reading, goodnight!**


	8. All's Well, That Ends Well

**Tonight - an old bag has forgotten something, a Castle and a Hall do a re-enactment and a Black 5 gets kissed.**

_**Tornado and Friends Mainline Adventures**_

Hello readers of this not very good and not so popular fanfic series, this' Olton Hall, aka Hogwarts Castle here and I love a good wedding. Well who doesn't eh? I mean, the bride and groom tying the knot, all the congratulations and confetti to go with it, it's all just so beautiful. In fact, my Black 5 friend Solaris attended a wedding once when he was asked to find a good luck package. And with the help of two of his friends, he managed to deliver the good luck package just as the tying of the knot finished and everyone was waiting outside for him. What do he use for the good luck package? Well find out now as I narrate what turned out to be our version of TTTE episode _'Happy Ever After'_. Enjoy!

**This episode stars:**

**LMS Black 5 no.44932 (who we named Solaris) and his driver**

**GWR King no.6023 **_**'King Edward II'**_

**LNER A4 no.60009 **_**'Union of South Africa'**_

**GWR Castle no.5043 **_**'Earl of Mount Edgcumbe'**_

**GWR Hall no.4965 **_**'Rood Ashton Hall'**_

**Metropolitan Railway Electric Locomotive no.12 **_**'Sarah Siddons'**_

**Michelle the Tractor**

**Mrs Friend and her daughter**

**The Fat Director**

**LMS Black 5 no.45407 **_**'Lancashire Fusilier'**__**(mentioned)**_

**LMS Black 5 no.45212 **_**'Roy 'Korky' Green'**__**(mentioned)**_

Episode 81: All's Well, That Ends Well

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** The engines on the Great British mainline love holiday time. One morning, Solaris was taking some empty trucks to the docks. He had to stop at a red signal. Michelle the Tractor was working in the nearby field. She came over to Solaris.

**Michelle:** Hello Solaris, nice day for it isn't it?

**Solaris:** _(confused)_ Err, mm, nice day for what?

**Michelle:** Mrs Friend's daughter's getting married today remember?

**Solaris:** Oh yes of course, I mustn't forget that.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Just then, the signal changed to green. Solaris whistled goodbye to Michelle and carried on his way. As he approached Mrs Friend's cottage, he saw that she was standing by her gate waving a red flag. I wonder where she got that red flag from?

**Solaris' Driver:** What's the matter Mrs Friend?

**Mrs Friend:** I've forgotten about the good luck package for the bride.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Solaris didn't know much about weddings so he had no idea what Mrs Friend was talking about.

**Solaris:** _(puzzled)_ Err, what's a good luck package?

**Mrs Friend:** It must contain something old, something new, something borrowed and something blue. Can you help please?

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Solaris didn't really know how but his driver was determined.

**Solaris' Driver:** We'll certainly do our best Mrs Friend!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Solaris then carried on his journey for the docks. He arrived at a station where he had to stop at another red signal.

**Solaris:** _(annoyed)_ Are there anymore red signals I've got to bloody well stop at?!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** He then spotted Union of South Africa in the station siding.

**Union of South Africa:** Hello Solaris, something on your mind?

**Solaris:** Yes indeed there is something on my mind Union of South Africa. I've got to find a good luck package. Do you know what it is?

**Union of South Africa:** Oh yes indeed Solaris, in fact I'm surprised you've forgotten. It contains something old, something new…

**Solaris:** Something borrowed and something blue, but do you know where I'd be able to find them?

**Union of South Africa:** _(smiles)_ There're probably staring at you in your smoke box. Now if you'll excuse me, I've got to go and fetch my special train, I'm taking guests to the wedding.

**Solaris:** _(calls as Union of South Africa puffs away)_ Hey wait a minute, how can you say you're surprised I've forgotten what a good luck package is when I had no idea what it is in the first place?!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** When Solaris finally arrived at the docks, he looked all around him for something that could be used in the good luck package. Suddenly, he spotted a truck which was loaded with a new set of shiny buffers.

**Solaris:** Hey look over there, there's something new for the good luck package!

**Solaris' Driver:** You're quite right there Solaris! Those buffers are just the ticket. I'll speak to the foreman.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** So off the driver went to speak to the foreman. When he returned, he brought good news to his engine.

**Solaris' Driver:** The foreman said we can use them and we can also BORROW the truck as well so that's two things we've found from the good luck package list; something borrowed and something new!

**Solaris:** What about the other things though?

**Solaris' Driver:** I'm sure we'll find them to but right now we'd better be on our way.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** So the driver hopped into Solaris' cab and he then set off. Later that day, Solaris had collected another goods train and had just arrived at the yard where they were needed. He was just reversing them into a siding when he heard a voice.

**Sarah Siddons:** Hello there Solaris.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** There was Sarah Siddons, obviously, who you may remember from a couple of episodes ago where Solaris' brothers Lancashire Fusilier and Roy 'Korky' Green saved her from scrap.

**Solaris:** Oh hello Sarah Siddons. What're you doing here, shouldn't you be working on the London Underground?

**Sarah Siddons:** The Fat Director has told me that because I've been working so hard on the London Underground since I was brought onto there that he has decided to give me the week off.

**Solaris:** Oh right…hey, wait a minute, you're it!

**Sarah Siddons:** I'm what it Solaris?

**Solaris:** The something old for the wedding!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Solaris explained everything to Sarah Siddons and she was happy to play the part of something old for the good luck package.

**Solaris:** Now then, we've just got to find something blue, but what and where?

**Solaris' Driver:** I've just got off the phone to the driver of the engine who has agreed to be the something blue Solaris, we've just got to find him. You'll find out who it is once we do.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** With the trucks dropped off and Sarah Siddons coupled up behind the borrowed trucks with the new buffers, Solaris and his rather unusual looking train ventured out of the yard. As he approached the harbour, he and Sarah Siddons were thinking.

**Sarah Siddons:** I really hope no one tries to ruin what'll surely be a great wedding Solaris.

**Solaris:** Yeah, why would someone want to ruin a WEDDING of all events anyway? I mean, that'll be more idiotic than the time Earl of Mount Edgcumbe and Rood Ashton Hall re-enacted the Dangerous Brothers while Olton Hall was in steam.

_**(Flashback)**_

_Earl of Mount Edgcumbe puffs out of open shed door. The shed door closes behind him._

**Earl of Mount Edgcumbe:** Good evening ladies and gentlemen, we, are, the Dangerous Engines!

_Rood Ashton Hall bursts through the other shed door, blowing it off its hinges._

**Rood Ashton Hall:** Ahh, Dangerous Engines!

**Earl of Mount Edgcumbe:** My name…

**Rood Ashton Hall:** Good evening Britain!

**Earl of Mount Edgcumbe:** Alright, alright, I'll do the talking. My name…

**Rood Ashton Hall:** Alright, he will do the talking!

**Earl of Mount Edgcumbe:** Will you shut up! Now then, my name is Earl Dangerous! And this' Rood Ashton Dangerous!

_Rood Ashton Hall runs over a randomly placed detonator on his track, resulting in a loud bang._

**Earl of Mount Edgcumbe:** I'm usually dangerous, I trust you'll agree! Yes, we're in Dangerland! So without further ado ladies and gentlemen, Rood Ashton Hall will now get his brakes taken out so he can perform the big stunt of the evening!

**Rood Ashton Hall:** _(quietly to Earl of Mount Edgcumbe)_ And while I'm doing that, you keep them laughing.

_Rood Ashton Hall reverses back into the shed._

**Earl of Mount Edgcumbe:** Keep them laughing…keep them laughing? Err, hahahahaha, urm, hahaha, err now then, hahaha, there was a young engine from…err, knockers! Who, who had, an enormous, pair of…_(front)_ buffers. Err, one, was a whopper! Err, err, one, was a, jumbly-wobbly! Err, and the other one, was an enormous, great big, golden, bozo!

**Rood Ashton Hall:** _(from inside the shed)_ That's three!

**Earl of Mount Edgcumbe:** …Err, I know, I know, err, I haven't finished yet! Err, okay, here's a joke for you! What the difference between the manager of Barclays having a fight and Justin Bieber? One's a warring banker and the other one's a boring wa…

**Olton Hall:** Alright that's enough of that you two!

_**(End of Flashback)**_

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** For goodness sake, did you have to remind me of that?! _(sighs angrily)_ Anyway, Solaris soon found an old shed up ahead and he could see what looked like an engine inside.

**Solaris' Driver:** _(laughs)_ What do you think of this Solaris?

**Solaris:** Well bust my boiler! Kind Edward II, what're you doing here?

**King Edward II:** Well isn't it rather obvious Solaris? I mean, I'm painted blue and I'm covered in confetti, which must mean I'm the something blue for the wedding.

**Solaris' Driver:** Now then Solaris, Mrs Friend has chosen you to be her special guest.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Solaris was delighted to hear this. Soon, the wedding was taking place. The bride and groom had just tied and knot and were now outside waiting for the good luck package to arrive before they could start the party. It did just a few seconds later as King Edward II led the way with the borrowed trucks loaded with set of new buffers and Sarah Siddons brining up the rear. Solaris was also arriving on the other track. Both engines were covered in confetti. As the good luck package arrived, the Fat Director, who was also in attendance, addressed everybody.

**The Fat Director:** Ladies and gentlemen, may I present the good luck package! _(points to Sarah Siddons)_ Something old! _(points to the new set of buffers)_ Something new! _(points to the truck)_ Something borrowed! _(points to Kind Edward II)_ Something blue! All found by Solaris and his crew!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Solaris and King Edward II whistled and everyone cheered. The bride then made her way over to the engines.

**Bride:** Thank you King Edward II. And thank you Solaris. It's the best good luck package ever.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** She then made her way onto Solaris' buffer beam and firmly kissed him on his right cheek. King Edward II laughed as Solaris blushed bright red. In fact, his cheeks were almost the same colour as me.

**Bride:** I can definitely see why Mr George Walkers decided to name 44932 'Solaris', it's because you're a handsome stallion of an engine.

**King Edward II:** _(confused)_ Eh, handsome stal…? I thought Solaris was a steam locomotive, not a horse. We steam engines can't gallop can we?

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Everyone laughed as the party started. The wedding was a great success, all thanks to Solaris. That night, Solaris and King Edward II was in the old shed at the harbour.

**Solaris:** You know, I was never really into weddings. However, after this one, I think it's fair to say that I like weddings now.

**King Edward II:** _(teasingly)_ Did you like your kiss?

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Solaris was embarrassed though so he pretended to be asleep. This action just gave King Edward II the answer he was looking for.

**And that's episode 81/episode 8 of T&FMLA Series 4 done! Hope you enjoyed my parody of TTTE episode **_**'Happy Ever After'**_**. Please review and I request criticism. And on that bombshell, it's time to end, thanks very much for reading, goodnight!**


	9. Carry Someone Else a Joy

**Tonight - the narrator tells her own story, a stupidly named crane brings in a delivery and The Great Marquess describes his ideal night in **_**(The Great Marquess: vomit and sputum and other bodily secretions).**_

_**Tornado and Friends Mainline Adventures**_

Hello readers of this not very good and not so popular fanfic series, this' Olton Hall, aka Hogwarts Castle here and…well for today's episode, it's going to be about me, back when I was in steam. You see, as I told you at the start of this series, I had the sort of personality you'd get if you combined James and Percy from TTTE and for the story I'm about to tell you, I was in full James mode, my reputation was at an all-time low at the time, I mean I had to shunt trucks when I should've been taking passengers, GRR! _(sighs)_ Okay Olton, calm down girl, calm down and just tell the story. Alright, here we go as I narrate what turned out to be our version of TTTE episode _'Make Someone Happy'_. Enjoy!

**This episode stars:**

**GWR Hall no.5972 **_**'Olton Hall'**_** (Hogwarts Castle) and her driver**

**GWR Hall no.4936 **_**Kinlet Hall'**_

**GWR Hall no.4953 **_**'Pitchford Hall'**_

**GWR Castle no.5029 **_**'Nunney Castle'**_

**LNER K4 no.61994 **_**'The Great Marquess'**_

**Harry the Helicopter**

**Kong the Crane**

**Brutus the Double-Decker**

**The Fat Director**

**Mrs Friend**

Episode 82: Carry Someone Else a Joy

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** It was holiday time in Great Britain and all the engines were working hard and happily…well, all except me.

**Olton Hall:** _(angrily)_ Why should a splendid celebrity engine like me shunt and take coal trucks instead of coaches Nunney Castle?! Maybe one of my sisters like Kinlet or Pitchford should do it because they're not as important as I am!

**Nunney Castle:** _(crossly)_ Olton Hall, why don't you think about something or someone else for a change? You'll be amazed at how much better you'll feel when you do!

**Olton Hall:** _(snorts)_ Pah! Being important is the only thing for me to think about!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** And I then puffed away in a cloud of steam. Geez, looking back, I really was a bit of a bitch wasn't I? Meanwhile, Lion Fly the Plane was flying a banner promoting the seaside fair. My sisters Kinlet Hall and Pitchford Hall looked up and saw Lion Fly overhead.

**Pitchford Hall:** That plane's certainly making a lot of noise about something.

**Kinlet Hall:** It's name's Lion Fly and it's telling everyone about the seaside fair that's starting tonight.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Just the, Nunney Castle arrived.

**Nunney Castle:** What're you two doing here?

**Kinlet Hall:** The Fat Director wants me and my sister here to pick up a very special load from the harbour.

**Pitchford Hall:** And I think its got something to do with the fair.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** And then they puffed away to collect the special load. Back to me now and I was collecting quarry trucks from the yard and my red paint was covered in quarry dust as I biffed some of the trucks hard.

**Olton Hall:** _(grumbles)_ Dustier and dustier!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Just then, I spotted my friend Mrs Friend.

**Olton Hall:** She looks rather miserable doesn't she?

**Olton Hall's Driver:** Indeed so Olton Hall, I'd better go and see what's wrong with her.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** So my driver got out of my cab and walked over to Mrs Friend to ask her why she was looking miserable.

**Olton Hall's Driver:** What's the matter Mrs Friend?

**Mrs Friend:** _(sobs)_ My sister has just rung to tell me that she can't come to stay with me and I was so looking forward to her visit!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Poor cow…err, don't tell her I just said that! Anyway, when the Fat Director heard the sad news he quickly made his decision on what to do.

**The Fat Director:** We must cheer her up! Send Harry the Helicopter to pick her up immediately!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Once Harry got the call, he was soon up in the air and flying over the mainline to the yard. A few minutes later, there was a surprise for Mrs Friend as Harry landed, blowing more quarry dust onto my red paint while doing so that bloody whirly bird moron!

**Harry:** All present and correct! I'm here on a flying visit! Hop aboard Mrs Friend and fly in the sky with me, compliments of the Fat Director!

**Mrs Friend:** Ooh, how lovely.

**Olton Hall:** _(coughs)_ Harry's made my red paint dustier than ever!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Don't get me wrong though because I was happy for Mrs Friend. She was soon flying high in Harry and she was really enjoying herself.

**Mrs Friend:** I've never seen the country and its mainline from this high up before and it's wonderful!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** At one point, they flew over The Great Marquess who was talking to Brutus the double-decker bus turned vegetable stand on wheels.

**The Great Marquess:** I must say Brutus I'm glad to see that you've finally started showing some respect towards us steam engines.

**Brutus:** Yeah, I'm sorry about the way I acted before. Now though, I'm just happy to be useful again and the fact that I can now sell vegetables to people around the mainline and not just the Bo'ness and Kinneil Railway up in Scotland.

**The Great Marquess:** In fact, weren't you one of those new buses for London?

**Brutus:** Yes indeed I was.

**The Great Marquess:** Yeah I thought so because I remember it being quoted that over your lifetime, about 4 million people would get on and off buses like that so you would've been a bit of a collecting point for vomit and sputum and other bodily secretions.

**Brutus:** Eww, I never thought of it like that before. But in that case thank goodness I'm not one of them anymore.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Can we please get back to my story?! My sisters Kinlet and Pitchford had just arrived at the harbour where Kong the Crane was unloading an old tram steamer.

**Kong:** Hey down there, you two, I'm playing lucky dip in the trampers hold and all these are for you!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Once the load was on the quayside, the workmen removed the tarpaulin to unveil…

**Pitchford Hall:** _(exclaims)_ Wooden horses, for the carousel ride!

**Kinlet Hall:** It's going to be a very exciting fair Pitchford.

**Olton Hall:** _(whistles excitedly in)_ It is indeed my sisters! In fact, the Fat Director has ordered me to stop pulling coal trucks and go to the station instead! Something to do with Mrs Friend, goodbye! _(whistles excitedly away)_

**Pitchford Hall:** _(gasps)_ Well what do you think of that?

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Mrs Friend was already at the station waiting for me with the Fat Director. Once I reversed in with the only required carriage, the Fat Director spoke to Mrs Friend.

**The Fat Director:** Now this Mr Friend is your very special treat. Olton Hall here will take you on a magical mystery tour and I shall meet you at your destination.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Mrs Friend quickly and excitedly stepped into the carriage and then the guard blew his whistle and waved his green flag. I whistled out of the station. I took Mrs Friend down one of her favourite routes that ran along the coast. All across the journey, I was thinking how the hell was the Fat Director going to get to our destination before us? The road must be quicker I thought. When I arrived at our destination, Dawlish Warren station, a big surprise was waiting for Mrs Friend. She gasped in amazement when she saw the surprise.

**Mrs Friend:** _(cries)_ Ooh, you've brought me to the fairground, how lovely.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** What was best of all for her was that the Fat Director invited her to make the announcement.

**Mrs Friend:** I declare this fairground open!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** The side stalls then lit up and Mrs Friend had the first ride on the carousel. As I watched the eventfulness of the place, I spoke to Nunney Castle who was also in attendance.

**Olton Hall:** _(whispers)_ You were quite right Nunney Castle, making someone happy does indeed cheer you up.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Nunney Castle smiled, she was happy that I'd learnt something from today. And together, we both watched the fun of the fair.

**And that's episode 82/episode 9 of T&FMLA Series 4 done! Hope you enjoyed my parody of TTTE episode **_**'Make Someone Happy'**_**. Please review, I request criticism and I apologise if it's a bit short. And on that bombshell, it's time to end, thanks very much for reading, goodnight!**


	10. Don't Beat Me!

**Tonight - an old engine goes under routine maintenance, a young engine's being cheeky, not for the first time, and a father unknowingly gets it wrong for the sake of a joke.**

_**Tornado and Friends Mainline Adventures**_

Hello readers of this not very good and not so popular fanfic series, this' Olton Hall, aka Hogwarts Castle here and I'm just going to come out with it, my celebrity friend City of Truro is very old. He really is, I mean he was built on the 1903, meaning he's over 100 years old. And despite this, he's still in good working order, even after all the years when he became the first ever steam engine to reach 100mph. For today, this episode's about him where age was starting to catch up with him it had to be said, and Tornado, being her cheeky self, decided to tease him about it. City of Truro was having none of it though. What happened next? Well find out now as I narrate what turned out to be our version of TTTE episode _'You Can't Win'_. Enjoy!

**This episode stars:**

**GWR 3700 Class no.3440 **_**'City of Truro'**_** and his driver**

**LNER Peppercorn A1 no.60163 **_**'Tornado'**_

**SR West Country no.34046 **_**'Braunton'**_

**A Guard**

**A Father and Son**

Episode 83: Don't Beat Me!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** My old celebrity friend City of Truro is an absolute legend in the world of steam locomotives. This story's about him. It happened not so long ago when loads of holidaymakers were travelling along the British mainline for the summer to see the coast and the countryside. However, the one thing they all came to see most of all was City of Truro. He'd always pull his passenger trains, even on days when he wasn't feeling well.

**City of Truro:** I mustn't disappoint my friends.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Every morning he'd take his passengers up and down the line and he'd stop anywhere they wanted, like here when he stopped by a lake.

**City of Truro:** PEEP-PEEP! Please be ready when I come back for you, otherwise you might miss your boat to the other side of the country and that would never do.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** However, one day, City of Truro wasn't feeling well. He was short of steam and glad of a rest. His driver and fireman had just finished clearing his tubes when Tornado bustled in.

**Tornado:** _(teasingly)_ Hello old bastard.

**City of Truro:** _(crossly)_ Oh that's just charming Tornado!

**Tornado:** _(giggles)_ So what's up with you then? Are you short of puff?

**City of Truro:** Nothing of the sort Tornado, this' just some routine maintenance!

**Tornado:** _(cheekily)_ I'll tell you what, you're getting old. So young engines like me have to take care of you in case you break down.

**City of Truro:** _(whooshes as he steams away)_ Humph! That'll be the day!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Knowing City of Truro though, he couldn't stay angry for long. It was a lovely evening so of course he was going to cheer up. As he took his passengers along the line, he was smiling happily.

**City of Truro:** Couldn't be better, couldn't be better!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Just then, City of Truro spotted a hill up ahead, but he didn't mind the mere sight of it though.

**City of Truro:** _(puffs)_ I've got plenty of steam. We'll be up in a couple of puffs.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** However, City of Truro's puffs soon changed into wheezes and his valves were leaking steam.

**City of Truro:** _(groans)_ It's not so easy, it's not so easy. But I'll manage.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Eventually though, they reached the station where City of Truro's driver examined him carefully. All the passengers were waiting anxiously for news. The guard of the train was finally ready to tell them.

**Guard:** _(assuring)_ City of Truro's going to take you to harbour but he might be late. Therefore two engines are coming to help. Don't worry though because you'll still catch your boat.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** The two engines that came to help a few minutes later were Tornado and Braunton. Braunton was coupled up in front and Tornado was coupled up at the back.

**Braunton:** Poor old City of Truro, what a shame you've broken down.

**Tornado:** _(teasingly)_ PEEP-PEEP-PEEP! This' the day!

**Braunton:** _(whistles)_ Alright, are you ready back there Tornado?!

**Tornado:** Yes indeed I am!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** And off they went. All along the journey, City of Truro was cursing Tornado's teasing. They soon reached the next station which was where the cavalcade split up. Some coaches had been brought onto the other track which was where some of the passengers switched into and Braunton then took them to the boat. Meanwhile, Tornado had now coupled up to the front of the other train with the other passengers with City of Truro behind her.

**Tornado:** _(boasts)_ Fancy me rescuing City of Truro, this' the day, this' the day! _(guard blows his whistle and they set off)_ Poor old engine, poor old engine!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** However, unbeknownst to Tornado, City of Truro still had plenty of steam left in him. His valves were sounding worse than they were. Despite this though, he and his driver had their own little joke to play. They waited until Tornado had guided the train to the next hill.

**City of Truro's Driver:** NOW!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Then, much to Tornado's surprise, City of Truro puffed and roared as though as was pushing the whole train before him. The noise was echoing everywhere as City of Truro took Tornado from behind…no that can't be right. Anyway, they soon reached the final station where everyone was cheering. One child though was confused.

**Son:** What happened Daddy? I mean, they don't usually need two engines on a train.

**Father:** Well son, Tornado broke down and City of Truro had to help her. And it sounds like he had a hard job of it to.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** City of Truro and his drivers joke had worked.

**Tornado:** _(exclaims)_ Fiddlesticks!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** She then vanished in a cloud of steam. Once the steam had cleared, City of Truro eased up alongside her.

**City of Truro:** _(teasingly)_ So I'm a poor old engine am I? I'm afraid it's no good Tornado because you just can't win.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** _(laughs)_ Hahaha, that'll teach you Tornado you cheeky youngster!

**Tornado:** Oh for crying out loud Olton Hall, will you shut the bloody hell up!…Actually don't shut the bloody hell up just yet because I've been meaning to ask you, how on earth are you breaking the fourth wall like this?!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** _(smugly)_ You seem to be forgetting Tornado my young friend that I came from the Harry Potter films, which means I can basically do anything because I'm magical.

**Tornado:** _(quietly)_ Whatever you red berk.

**And that's episode 83/episode 10 of T&FMLA Series 4 done! Hope you enjoyed my parody of TTTE episode **_**'You Can't Win'**_**. Please review, I request criticism and I apologise of it's a bit short. And on that bombshell, it's time to end, thanks very much for reading, goodnight!**


	11. Lizzie's Brass Band

**Tonight - royalty gets knocked over, a bus gets stuck and a tuba can somehow be heard from a faraway distance.**

_**Tornado and Friends Mainline Adventures**_

Hello readers of this not very good and not so popular fanfic series, this' Olton Hall, aka Hogwarts Castle here and you can always expect to be in the presence of royalty when Princess Elizabeth's about. Though she's full of pride, she really does mean well like when she was chosen to pick up a brass band one summers day. Unfortunately for her though, a careless bastard used a giant boiler to knock her off the tracks and she was indignantly replaced by Roberto. While the Princess was being repaired, it was raining heavily. What happened next, well find out now as I narrate what turned out to be our version of TTTE episode _'Edward's Brass Band'_. Enjoy!

**This episode stars:**

**LMS Princess Royal no.46201 **_**'Princess Elizabeth'**_** and her driver**

**LNER B1 no.61306 **_**'Mayflower'**_

**LMS Princess Coronation no.46233 **_**'Duchess of Sutherland'**_

**Roberto the Bus**

**Kong the Crane**

**The Fat Director**

**Brass Band**

Episode 84: Lizzie's Brass Band

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Summer's a very busy time on the Great British mainline because holidaymakers have so much to see and do…which you should know about following the previous episode. There're train rides to the seaside, balloon rides over the countryside and a brass band playing. One morning, Mayflower puffed into Peterborough station where Princess Elizabeth was getting ready to leave.

**Mayflower:** Good morning Princess.

**Princess Elizabeth:** _(puffs away)_ Sorry Mayflower, your Princess must go, goodbye!

**Mayflower:** Well okay then, talk to you later yeah?!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Princess Elizabeth whistled as if to say 'ok'. Early that afternoon, Princess Elizabeth was being turned on a turntable when Duchess of Sutherland puffed alongside and she was pleased to see her BFF.

**Duchess of Sutherland:** You know Princess, your smile's as brought as your smoke box.

**Princess Elizabeth:** Your Princess's smiling like this Duchess because she's on her way to pick up the brass band. The concert's tomorrow night.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** One Princess Elizabeth was turned, she puffed away en route for the docks.

**Duchess of Sutherland:** _(calls teasingly)_ Don't crack your smoke box BFF!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Princess Elizabeth heard the teasing call from the Duchess and rolled her eyes but still smiled. Princess Elizabeth loved the sound of lovely music, especially that of the brass band. In fact, when she arrived at the docks, she didn't notice a giant crane which was unloading a huge ships boiler. The crane then started to turn with its hook attached firmly to the boiler. Suddenly, there was a giant swing from the crane which flung the boiler straight into Princess Elizabeth and knocked her off the track, landing on her side into a randomly placed pile of coal. Kong had been watching and he was laughing at what he'd just seen.

**Kong:** _(laughs)_ You steam engines are always getting in the way!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Poor Princess Elizabeth was left feeling very dazed and it was all thanks to that careless bastard operating the crane! Once the Fat Director received the call of what happened, he arrived at the docks as quickly as he possibly could…by car for obvious reasons. He inspected the scene as the workmen started work on getting the Princess back onto the rails.

**The Fat Director:** Once you're back on the rails Princess, we'll take you to the fitters yard. However, because of this…mishap, Roberto will have to pick up the brass band instead if you.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Princess Elizabeth said nothing but she was feeling very miserable. That night, Princess Elizabeth was at the fitters yard being repaired. However, a raging storm had rolled in and the fitters were working through the darkness and this terrible weather to try and mend the Princess. The rain was pelting down and now the Princess was feeling miserable and very damp. Morning soon came and the storm had cleared. Just as Princess Elizabeth had woken up, the Fat Director walked up to her.

**Princess Elizabeth:** Please sir, will your fitters be finished soon.

**The Fat Director:** Not soon enough and the band can't wait. I'm sorry Princess Elizabeth but Roberto will have to take them to the concert.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Poor Princess Elizabeth felt worse than ever and her dignity was now at an all time low at the thought of being replaced by a bus, especially the one she once defeated in a race. Meanwhile, Roberto had just picked up the brass band at the docks and had now set off. He drove cheerily along the country roads. Just then, he spotted trouble up ahead and stopped. Last nights storm had flooded the road and a massive puddle was right in front of him. He knew that he couldn't go any further down this route so he reversed backwards in the hope of finding another route to take. Just then, his driver spotted one. It was a very muddy shortcut. Roberto wasn't too keen on the shortcut but decided to do his best to get through the mud. As Roberto rumbled along, his wheels really weren't enjoying the mud as they scooted, skated, slid and slipped.

**Roberto:** _(angrily)_ Alright Olton Hall, there's no need to rub it in!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Hehehe, sorry. Anyway, the mud eventually got the better of Roberto as he grounded to a stop.

**Roberto:** _(groans)_ I'm stuck!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Roberto didn't bother trying to rev his way out because he knew he wasn't going to go any further as he was well and truly stuck in the mud. The brass band had now realised that they were stuck so they got out of Roberto. They made their way through the mud to the bank and they were feeling very worried.

**Band Leader:** _(cries)_ We mustn't be late for our concert so tune up your tubas and we'll call for help!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** By now, Princess Elizabeth had finally been mended and was hooked up to some coaches. It was a good thing to see that she was smiling again. Just then, she and her driver heard something.

**Lizzie's Driver:** Is it just me or can I hear music your highness?

**Princess Elizabeth:** _(wheeshes)_ That's not music driver, that sounds more like an alarm to your Princess.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** With a blow of her whistle, they raced off to the rescue. As they steamed along, they could hear the sounds of the tuba getting louder and louder. At long last, they rounded a bend where they found the brass band who were all delighted to see the Princess and so was Roberto.

**Princess Elizabeth:** _(cries)_ Don't worry band members, your Princess will get you to the concert on time.

**Brass Band:** Oh thank you so much Princess!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** As quickly as they possibly could, the bandsmen hopped into Princess Elizabeth's coaches and then she whistled away. Princess Elizabeth raced along the track as fast as her wheels would let her, she had the concert location on time. Just as the sun was setting, the exhausted Princess Elizabeth arrived just in time at the concert location.

**Brass Band Leader:** _(delightfully)_ Thanks a lot Princess, we should just have enough time to prepare.

**Princess Elizabeth:** _(tired)_ No problem boys.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** That night, the concert was a great success as all the engines and people listened to the brass bands music and were really loving it and they were all utterly enjoying themselves…especially Princess Elizabeth as she closed her eyes and relaxed, soothing in the music.

**And that's episode 84/episode 11 of T&FMLA Series 4 done! Hope you enjoyed my parody of TTTE episode **_**'Edward's Brass Band'**_**. Please review, I request criticism and I apologise if it's a bit short. And on that bombshell, it's time to end, thanks very much for reading, goodnight!**


	12. Jet Engine of Tornado

**Tonight - Bittern's boasting, Repton gets covered in soot and Roberto asks a question that turns out to be rather pointless.**

_**Tornado and Friends Mainline Adventures**_

Hello readers of this not very good and not so popular fanfic series, this' Olton Hall, aka Hogwarts Castle here and it's a well known fact that my friend Bittern's the fastest steam engine working on the mainline. Of course, she's no where near as fast as her world famous sister Mallard, but Mallard has never worked in preservation, whereas Bittern has and she currently holds the record for fastest top speed during the preservation era. She does tend to boast about this but you should've seen her reaction when Tornado raced past her, oh it was so funny. _(giggles)_ I might not have been around when this event happened but boy did I have a good laugh about it when I first heard about it. I tell you what, discover the full story now as I narrate what turned out to be our version of TTTE episode _'Thomas the Jet Engine'_. Enjoy!

**This episode stars:**

**LNER Peppercorn A1 no.60163 **_**'Tornado'**_

**LNER A4 no.4464 **_**'Bittern'**_** and her driver**

**SR Schools Class no.30926 **_**'Repton'**_

**GWR 4575 Class no.5521/London Transport no.L150 (who we named Prairie)**

**LMS Black 5 no.45428 **_**'Eric Treacy'**_

**The Fat Director**

**Kong the Crane**

**Roberto the Bus**

**A Signalman**

**LNER A4 no.60009 **_**'Union of South Africa'**__**(mentioned)**_

**LNER A4 no.60007 **_**'Sir Nigel Gresley'**__**(mentioned)**_

Episode 85: Jet Engine of Tornado

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Bittern's a very proud steam locomotive. In fact, she's the fastest steam engine currently working on the mainline. She loves speeding across the tracks with the wind blowing across her funnel. One afternoon, she puffed into Doncaster station.

**Bittern's Driver:** You've broken your personal best record again Bittern!

**Bittern:** _(boastfully)_ I'm the fastest!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Not all the engines were impressed by this though.

**Repton:** _(smugly)_ Speed isn't everything you know Bittern.

**Tornado:** But being reliable and useful is.

**Bittern:** _(snorts)_ You slow engines will never understand because you'll never go as fast as me.

**Repton:** Can't your siblings Union of South Africa and Sir Nigel Gresley also go 90mph?

**Bittern:** I'm the only one of us three that's actually done 90mph, the other two will never be allowed to do it now that I've done it!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Just then, the Fat Director came onto the platform with news and a special for Tornado.

**The Fat Director:** Tornado, I want you to collect the jet engine and take it to the airfield.

**Tornado:** Yes sir.

**Prairie:** _(confused)_ Err, what's a jet engine sir?

**The Fat Director:** A jet engine Prairie goes forward by pushing hot air out of its back.

**Tornado:** Just like when you blow up a balloon and let it go little Prairie, it's very fast. _(whistles and puffs away)_

**Repton:** I must admit, I'm surprised that Tornado knows about the invention known as the jet engine. Anyway, I'd also better be off because I've got some school children to pick up and take home.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** And then Repton steamed off. Meanwhile, Tornado was heading en route for the docks. Tornado always enjoys making special deliveries for the Fat Director because it makes her feel special. However, secretly, she wished that she could be as fast as Bittern, just once.

**Tornado:** _(sighs)_ If only I can go 90mph like Bittern did.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** With a cheerful whistle, Tornado arrived at the docks. She was excited when she saw Kong the Crane lowering the jet engine onto the rails. The jet engine was shiny and modern and Tornado had never seen anything like it. The jet engine was soon lowered onto the tracks and Tornado was quickly coupled onto it. She just couldn't wait to start her journey, however Kong was taking his time.

**Tornado:** _(huffs)_ Hurry up Kong you lagging twat, this' a 'special' special!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Kong really didn't like being told what to do or be insulted like that, especially from an engine. He became so cranky that he was careless with his hook. His hook knocked the switch and the switch started the jet engine. The engine then began to whine which was getting louder and louder and louder!

**Tornado:** What's that?

**Kong:** Uh oh!

**Tornado:** Uh oh what Kong?!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** But before Kong could say anything else the jet engine then surged against Tornado and was now rocketing her up the track.

**Tornado:** _(cries)_ OOOOH!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** The driver tried to put on the brakes but Tornado couldn't stop as she raced through a station!

**Tornado:** _(screams)_ OHHHH, BOY!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** The stationmaster called ahead to the signalman!

**Signalman:** Clear the lines because it's a runaway train!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** The signalman quickly changed signals and switched points! Tornado had never been so excited! Up ahead was another station where Repton was dropping off some of the school children. Tornado flew past her spraying soot all over her. A shocked Repton was shaking and her eyes were spinning violently. Then Tornado rocketed past Eric Treacy who was hauling a goods train. Eric Treacy gasped at what had just happened. And then Tornado, as she rounded a bend, raced by Prairie who was taking on water! Prairie was absolutely amazed! At a level crossing, Roberto came up to the closed gates. She then saw Tornado flying down the track.

**Roberto:** _(peeps)_ Eh Tornado, you fancy a race?! _(Tornado races past)_ Never mind.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Everyone Tornado had raced past had ever seen an engine go so fast! Meanwhile, Bittern was speeding along with her express train, however she had no idea that Tornado was racing along the opposite track going in the same direction as her.

**Bittern:** _(proudly)_ I AM the fastest.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Just then, she heard something from behind her.

**Bittern:** What's that?

**Tornado:** _(races past)_ Hi Bittern, bye Bittern!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Bittern was speechless, she simply couldn't believe what she had just seen as Tornado then vanished into the tunnel ahead. When Tornado emerged from the other end of the tunnel, she was still going like a stabbed rat and Bittern was now racing after her. At long last though, the jet engine ran out of fuel and Tornado was now travelling back under her own power. Tornado sighed, she really enjoyed that exciting experience. She steamed gently back into Doncaster station, all her friends were already there.

**Tornado:** Sorry for overtaking you back there Bittern.

**Bittern:** _(huffs)_ Overtake me? I didn't notice.

**Eric Treacy:** You didn't notice the fastest engine on the mainline.

**Tornado:** _(puffs)_ Yes I am the fastest!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Prairie felt a little sorry for Bittern.

**Prairie:** Bittern doesn't have to go as fast a jet engine because she's a steam engine!

**Repton:** _(whistles)_ She's still full of hot air though.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Bittern, saying nothing, just wheeshed away.

**And that's episode 85/episode 12 of T&FMLA Series 4 done! Hope you enjoyed my parody of TTTE episode **_**'Thomas the Jet Engine'**_**. Please review, I request criticism and I apologise of it's a bit short. And on that bombshell, it's time to end, thanks very much for reading, goodnight!**


	13. The Goblins and Guest of Honour

**Tonight - a nonexistent creature's apparently causing problems about the place, a turntable gets jammed and a very important visitor gets splashed on with bathwater.**

_**Tornado and Friends Mainline Adventures**_

Hello readers of this not very good and not so popular fanfic series, this' Olton Hall, aka Hogwarts Castle here and I happen to know for a fact that gremlins and goblins simply don't exist. Though one day my friends thought there were goblins about the place causing problems when a very important visitor came to see the Fat Director and the engines. What happened next? Well, find out now as I narrate what turned out to be our version of TTTE episode _'Gordon and the Gremlins'_. Enjoy!

**This episode stars:**

**LMS Black 5 no.44767 **_**'George Stephenson'**_** and his fireman**

**GWR King no.6024 **_**'King Edward I'**_

**SR West Country no.34046 **_**'Braunton'**_

**SR LN no.(30)850 **_**'Lord Nelson'**_

**LMS 8F no.48151 **_**'Gauge O Guild'**_** and his driver**

**LNER Peppercorn A1 no.60163 **_**'Tornado'**_

**LNER K1 no.62005 **_**'Lord of the Isles'**_** and his fireman**

**The Fat Director, his Mother and her Dog**

**A Firelighter**

Episode 86: The Goblins and Guest of Honour

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Early one morning, George Stephenson's fire just wouldn't light. The firelighter had tried and failed to start the fire. Upon his failure, he spoke to George Stephenson's footplate crew.

**Firelighter:** _(sighs)_ I just don't know what's wrong you guys. There must be some goblins about the place.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** The engines alongside George Stephenson heard this and it got them talking.

**Braunton:** What're goblins?

**King Edward I:** I've heard they're little midget men who play tricks.

**Braunton:** Can we find one?

**Lord Nelson:** Pah! Goblins don't exist because they're just an excuse when things go wrong and no one knows why!

**King Edward I:** _(insistent)_ Listen you ungrateful bastard of a Lord, if the firelighter says there're goblins then there ARE!

**Lord Nelson:** _(snorts)_ Huh!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** The Fat Director had heard everything as he arrived.

**The Fat Director:** SILENCE! Now then, I'm expecting a VIP, a very important person today. She has heard that all my mainline engines are really useful so please prove it.

**All the Engines:** Yes sir!

**Braunton:** As long as the goblins let us.

**The Fat Director:** What're you talking about Braunton, what goblins?

**Braunton:** The ones in George Stephenson's fire sir and that explains why he's not ready yet.

**The Fat Director:** _(thunders)_ We'll see about that! _(he walks over to George Stephenson)_ George Stephenson, I expect you to be on your best behaviour today because you're to pull the very special coach for my special visitor! But no high speeds please because she won't like that!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** George Stephenson was feeling proud and pleased. Later that morning, George Stephenson was waiting for the special coach he was going to be using to collect the Fat Director's special visitor. Unfortunately though, the turntable the special coach was on had got jammed. Just then, Braunton puffed by with some coal trucks.

**Braunton:** PEEP-PEEP! What's the matter George Stephenson, you're late?!

**George Stephenson:** Driver says there's goblins in the turntable!

**Braunton:** _(squeaks)_ They must be everywhere!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** At long last, the turntable was mended and George Stephenson was coupled up to the special coach which he then took quickly away. He was soon working hard to make up for lost time as he raced across the line. It had been agreed that George Stephenson was to pick up the Fat Director's VIP at London Paddington station. A few minutes after he'd arrived, the Fat Director, who was waiting for his VIP on the platform, was beginning to look worried.

**The Fat Director:** _(wonders)_ Where's Gauge O Guild? He's supposed to be bringing my visitor from the docks.

**George Stephenson:** _(huffs)_ Huh! Gauge O Guild's not really useful if he's late!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** It wasn't long though before Gauge O Guild whistled into the station.

**Gauge O Guild:** I'm sorry I'm late sir. It was because a lazy cow strayed on the line and we had to wait for the farmer to take that lousy piece of meat away! Driver says though that your visitor's here safe and sound.

**The Fat Director:** _(spots his visitor getting out of Gauge O Guild's train and smiles)_ Indeed she is! _(shakes hands with his VIP)_ How nice to see you.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Tornado was also at the station and she was very keen to know who this special visitor was.

**Tornado:** _(whispers)_ Who's that Gauge O Guild?

**Gauge O Guild:** I'm really not sure Tornado. All I do know is that the Fat Director's certainly keen to please her. In fact, he has arranged a special party for her.

**Tornado:** Hey look, she has got a dog.

**Gauge O Guild:** Oh yeah, a Dalmatian dog at that.

**Dog:** WOOF-WOOF!

**Gauge O Guild's Driver:** Alright Gauge O Guild, lets go and get you a drink.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Gauge O Guild then whistled and puffed out of the station as the Fat Director and his special visitor hopped onboard George Stephenson's special coach.

**George Stephenson:** _(huffs)_ Pah! Gauge O Guild's just a big, lazy and slow old engine! The Fat Director's expecting me to arrive on time! We're late because of Gauge O Guild the git!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** When George Stephenson reached some open track, his driver decided to make up for lost time. However, as George Stephenson picked up speed, there was trouble as his fireman had a thought.

**George Stephenson's Fireman:** I think we'd better slow down. I mean, we're currently on an old piece of track and it could make things uncomfortable for the VIP.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** And indeed it did. The old hag was taking a bath and water was slopping about all over the place.

**VIP:** _(cries)_ OOH-OOH-OOH!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Seriously, who puts a bath onboard a train?! Anyway, George Stephenson was very relieved when he reached his final destination where Lord of the Isles was waiting to pick up the Fat Director and his special visitor. George Stephenson blew an extra long whistle. This frightened the visitors Dalmatian dog so much that he fled from the station and ran into a field where a bull was grazing. When the bull saw the dog, it roared loudly at him. This frightened the little dog even more that he ran back into the station, onto the platform and over the footbridge. Lord of the Isles was watching the dogs every move. The dog didn't stopped until he jumped straight into Lord of the Isles' cab.

**Dog:** WOOF-WOOF!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** The guard then blew his whistle and Lord of the Isles puffed away with the Fat Director and his special visitor in his carriages. The dog meanwhile was having a wonderful ride with the driver and fireman in the cab, all the way to the docks. The sun was setting by the time they arrived.

**Lord of the Isles' Fireman:** What's the dogs name madam?

**VIP:** Well, after today's events, I think I'll rename him Goblin.

**The Fat Director:** _(laughs)_ In that case, I've met one at last. Ho, ho, ho!

**Lord of the Isles:** Excuse me sir, but who IS your very important visitor?

**The Fat Director:** Why didn't I tell you? This lady's my mother and she agrees with me that you all are indeed really useful engines. And my mother of course, is always right.

**Goblin:** WOOF-WOOF!

**And that's episode 86/episode 13 of T&FMLA Series 4 done! Hope you enjoyed my parody of TTTE episode **_**'Gordon and the Gremlin'**_**. Please review, I request criticism and I apologise if it's a bit short. And on that bombshell, it's time to end, thanks very much for reading, goodnight!**


	14. Clan Line and The Unknown Warrior

**Tonight - Clan Line spins her eyes, goes on an adventure and is convinced about a couple of haunted areas.**

_**Tornado and Friends Mainline Adventures**_

Hello readers of this not very good and not so popular fanfic series, this' Olton Hall, aka Hogwarts Castle here and you readers who've followed throughout the whole series may've figured out by now that my friend Clan Line sort of shares her personality with TTTE character Edward. For today's episode though, she was more like Toby since she was to go exploring with Fatso and his grandchildren. When they made a couple of discoveries, they decided to restore them, although Clan Line was convinced that these places were haunted. What happened when she had to stay in guard there one night? Well find out now as I narrate what turned out to be our version of TTTE episode _'Toby's Discovery'_. Enjoy!

**This episode stars:**

**SR Merchant Navy no.35028 **_**'Clan Line'**_** and her footplate crew**

**SR Merchant Navy no.35018 **_**'British India Line'**_

**LMS Patriot no.45551 **_**'The Unknown Warrior'**_

**LNER Peppercorn A1 no.60163 **_**'Tornado'**_

**The Fat Director and his Grandchildren**

**A Couple of Signalmen**

**SR West Country no.34046 **_**'Braunton'**__**(mentioned)**_

**LMS Black 5 no.44767 **_**'George Stephenson'**__**(mentioned)**_

Episode 87: Clan Line and The Unknown Warrior

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** One bright and sunny morning, the Fat Director and his grandchildren arrived at Stewarts Lane Depot to speak to Clan Line.

**The Fat Director:** Clan Line, I've put Braunton on VSOE Pullman duties today because I want you to take me and my grandchildren to the seaside at Dawlish. We shall use the special coach that George Stephenson used for my mother.

**Clan Line:** _(happily)_ Yes sir.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** With the special coach picked up and with the Fat Director and his grandchildren onboard, Clan Line set off for Dawlish. She puffed merrily into the station later that morning where the Fat Director and hid grandchildren stepped out of the special coach and made their way to the beach. They were delighted to see that the tide was out and there was no sign of it coming in. The children were soon playing in the sand and they had just built a splendid sandcastle. The Fat Director inspected it.

**The Fat Director:** My word, that's a very fine castle kids. I say, have you seen a real one like it?

**Grandchildren:** Yes Grandpa, it's here in the country!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** They then showed him a map with the whereabouts of the castle marked on it.

**The Fat Director:** _(ponders)_ Mmm.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** That afternoon, the Fat Director and his grandchildren had left the beach at Dawlish and had met up with Clan Line again, this time at the harbour. Clan Line still had the special coach coupled up behind her.

**The Fat Director:** Come on Clan Line, we're going exploring. It'll be a great adventure.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Clan Line spun her eyes with excitement. With the Fat Director and his grandchildren onboard the special coach, Clan Line whistled happily out of the harbour. Soon, they were in the wildest part of the country. Just then, they saw a lonely signal box up ahead and decided to stop at it. The Fat Director got out so he could speak to the signalman.

**Signalman 1:** Where might you be going then sir?

**The Fat Director:** We're trying to find an old castle.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** The Fat Director then showed the signalman the map.

**Signalman 1:** Oh I now know the place sir. There's a small junction not too far down the line, just switch the points.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** And with that, the Fat Director thanked the signalman, got back onboard and Clan Line continued onwards. Before long, they reached the points the signalman told them about. When Clan Line's fireman switched the points, their adventure could now really begin. Clan Line forged her way past branches and bushes until they came up to another little junction where they saw two old signs. One sign read 'To the Castle' and the other read 'To the Mine'.

**The Fat Director:** Mmm, must be an old castle that no one really remembers. We'll go and see that first.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** And that's what they did as they headed down that track. They stopped by an old water tower and then, perched on top of a hill…

**Grandchildren:** There's the castle!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** _(angrily)_ Oh thanks for interrupting me you little bastards!

**The Fat Director:** _(furiously)_ Hey, how dare you speak to my grandchildren like that Olton Hall!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** _(quietly)_ Oops, sorry fatso.

**The Fat Director:** AND I HEARD THAT!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** _(scared)_ Eep.

**The Fat Director:** _(sighs heavily)_ Anyways, yes that's the castle and now we shall visit the mine.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Once upon a time, this old mine was very useful before the start of the preservation era back in 1968 because loads of engines would…well, do things there. Nowadays though, even though the tracks were still laid around the place, everything visible was rusty and overgrown. The Fat Director was most impressed, however Clan Line was rather scared. She was glad though when it was time to go home. Clan Line puffed back to her home of Stewarts Lane Depot where the Fat Director spoke to her.

**The Fat Director:** I think the castle and the mine will make fine places for visitors Clan Line, though it's going to take a lot of hard work first.

**Clan Line:** _(nervously)_ Yes sir.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** The Fat Director's plans of restoring the areas were soon put into action. British India Line had just brought in some more supplies despite the fact that her sister Clan Line was still feeling rather worried.

**Clan Line:** _(to herself)_ I'm quite sure that this place's haunted.

**Clan Line's Driver:** It's our turn to stay here on guard tonight Clan Line.

**Clan Line:** _(stutters)_ O-O-Ooh! Y-Yes, w-w-why not.

**British India Line:** _(teasingly)_ Beware of the ghost sister.

**Clan Line:** _(worryingly)_ What ghost?

**British India Line:** Why the Unknown Warrior ghost of course. He comes out every night. He lights his fire and then goes hunting. _(whistles)_ TOOT-TOOT, goodbye!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** And with that, British India Line steamed away en route for home. Night time soon came. Clan Line looked anxiously around, everywhere seemed rather spooky to her and the mists weren't helping one bit. She really wished she could just go back home to Stewarts Lane.

**Clan Line:** _(quietly to herself)_ Alright, remember Clan Line old girl, there's no such thing as ghosts.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Just as she said this though, she suddenly heard a strange and rather loud wheezing sound!

**Clan Line:** _(wails)_ IT'S THE GHOST!

**Clan Line's Driver:** What ghost?

**Clan Line:** It's the Unknown Warrior and he's come to hunt me down!

**Clan Line's Driver:** Don't be so daft old girl! The fireman and I will go and investigate.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** And off they went, much to Clan Line's worry. Oddly though, they returned quite soon.

**Clan Line's Fireman:** _(laughs)_ The Unknown Warrior wants to meet you.

**Clan Line:** Can't he wait 'til morning?

**Clan Line's Driver:** Ghosts don't work dayshifts, now lets go.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Clan Line gulped before bravely making her way. When she saw who her ghost was, she was very surprised.

**Clan Line:** _(exclaims)_ Well piss my pistons!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** There in front of her was an engine she'd never seen before.

**Signalman 2:** This' your ghost Clan Line. This LMS Patriot no.45551 really is named The Unknown Warrior and he has been built to mark the end of the first world war in 2017.

**The Unknown Warrior:** Ah, so you're Clan Line eh? I've heard a lot about you, you know, being old and wise.

**Clan Line:**_ (relieved)_ Well this whole saga has certainly given me a real fright. And now all I can really say's welcome to the mainline fleet Unknown Warrior.

**The Unknown Warrior:** Thank you Clan Line.

**Clan Line:** Of course, now that you're here, it means Tornado's no longer the youngest engine of the mainline.

**The Unknown Warrior:** Oh yes, I've heard a lot about Tornado to.

**Clan Line:** And I'd advice that you look out for her because she can be a cheeky young scallywag.

**Tornado:** _(faint, angry shout in the distance)_ I CAN HEAR YOU CLAN LINE!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Clan Line and The Unknown Warrior both laughed. They're now firm friends. Whenever Clan Line's not on her VSOE Pullman specials, you'll often find her helping The Unknown Warrior taking visitors to the splendid castle and the mine. And if there really were any ghosts here, they were certainly helping to make these places really happy. However, although Tornado heard Clan Line's remark about her last night, she never heard about The Unknown Warrior…but that's another story.

**And that's episode 87/episode 14 of T&FMLA Series 4 done! Hope you enjoyed my parody of TTTE episode **_**'Toby's Discovery'**_**. Please review, I request criticism and I apologise if it's a bit short. And on that bombshell, it's time to end, thanks very much for reading, goodnight!**


	15. Special Special Train

**Tonight - Tornado's feeling jealous, there's a commotion going on and it's a happy ending for the GWR counterparts of the Dangerous Brothers.**

_**Tornado and Friends Mainline Adventures**_

Hello readers of this not very good and not so popular fanfic series, this' Olton Hall, aka Hogwarts Castle here and carrying in from the last episode, we met The Unknown Warrior for the very first time. After accidentally giving Clan Line such a fright, he helped her reopen an old castle and an old mine. Now though, it was time to see how Tornado reacted to his arrival when he was brought further onto the mainline. How did she react exactly? Well find out now as I narrate what turned out be our version of TTTE episode _'Thomas and Stepney'_. Enjoy!

**This episode stars:**

**LNER Peppercorn A1 no.60163 **_**'Tornado'**_** and her driver**

**SR West Country no.34046 **_**'Braunton'**_

**LMS Patriot no.45551 **_**'The Unknown Warrior'**_** and his driver**

**SR Merchant Navy no.35028 **_**'Clan Line'**_

**LMS Royal Scot no.46115 **_**'Scots Guardsman'**_

**LMS Royal Scot no.46100 **_**'Royal Scot'**_

**LMS Black 5 no.45305 **_**'Alderman A. E. Draper'**_

**GWR Castle no.5043 **_**'Earl of Mount Edgcumbe'**_

**GWR Hall no.4965 **_**'Rood Ashton Hall'**_

**A Signalman and a Man**

Episode 88: 'Special' Special Train

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** It was a bright and sunny morning in Great Britain and Tornado the young engine was feeling very proud of herself. Her blue paint was gleaming in the sunshine, she was puffing right on time and all around her route for this train the countryside seemed prettier than ever before. She steamed into the next station.

**Tornado:** _(happily)_ PEEP-PEEP, good morning Braunton! I'm the most popular engine currently working on the mainline, wouldn't you agree?!

**Braunton:** Err, y-yes T-Tornado, but…

**Tornado:** But what Braunton, out with it?

**Braunton:** Well, there's actually another new engine on the mainline who's getting more popularity than you.

**Tornado:** _(surprised)_ What, who?!

**Braunton:** His name's The Unknown Warrior. He's an LMS Patriot and the Fat Director says that he may soon be given the chance to come further onto the mainline.

**Tornado:** When?!

**Braunton:** Ooh, someday.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** And then Braunton hurried away with her goods train leaving a shocked Tornado behind. Meanwhile, The Unknown Warrior was puffing purposely along his line that ran between the old castle and the old mine that he helped reopen. Clan Line would often help him when she wasn't on her VSOE Pullman specials. The problem was though that this line wasn't very long and The Unknown Warrior was soon starting to grow bored of seeing the same sights over and over again. He was speaking to Clan Line about his problems.

**The Unknown Warrior:** _(sadly)_ Everyone has been so kind Clan Line and I've learnt an awful lot. However this line's rather short and I'm beginning to get rather bored of seeing these wonderful sights over and over again. I'd love to have a good long run on a different part of the mainline so I can do some exploring.

**Clan Line:** I think you should tell your driver to. I'm sure he'll understand.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Clan Line then puffed away. When The Unknown Warrior's driver returned, his engine told him about how he was feeling. And The Unknown Warrior was surprised to find that Clan Line was right, the driver did indeed feel the same way and understood.

**The Unknown Warrior's Driver:** Do you know Unknown Warrior, I feel exactly the same way.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** That evening, The Unknown Warrior's driver had some exciting news for his engine.

**The Unknown Warrior's Driver:** _(excitedly)_ Guess what Unknown Warrior, the Fat Director has invited us to meet more of his engines on other sections of the mainline! It'll be a long run to meet them!

**The Unknown Warrior:** _(sighs happily)_ Oh thank you.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** They set off the next morning. By now, all the other engines had gathered and they were all talking about The Unknown Warrior.

**Braunton:** He helped reopen that old castle and that old mine, did you know that?

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Tornado was feeling a little jealous.

**Tornado:** Hey, Olton Hall, I can hear you ya know ya magical red bitch!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** _(surprised)_ What, you were surprised! Now get back on script you stupid blue idiot!

**Tornado:** _(sighs)_ Fine. _(jealously to Braunton)_ Huh! He may already be famous but I'm the most popular engine working on the mainline and EVERYONE knows that to!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** And with that, she huffed away to fetch her coaches for her evening special.

**Braunton:** _(squeaks)_ Hey look!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Braunton had noticed that there was an awful lot of passengers waiting on the platform.

**Braunton:** _(confused)_ Why've they all come? I mean, there's no train due anytime soon.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** But Braunton was wrong because just then the signal dropped and a whistle could be heard in the distance.

**Scots Guardsman:** _(yells)_ Here he comes!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** The Unknown Warrior puffed proudly through the junction. All the engines whistled and they were all pleased to see him.

**Royal Scot:** I hope you get to meet Tornado to! You're both very popular engines in your own way!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** The Unknown Warrior then joined Alderman A. E. Draper on a doubleheader. Both engines had a really enjoyable afternoon, especially The Unknown Warrior as he really loved the new sights and he learned a lot of new things from Alderman A. E. Draper. That evening as The Unknown Warrior and Alderman A. E. Draper were resting, Tornado finally arrived.

**Tornado:** Sorry I can't talk, it's time for my final return leg of my evening special train. Mustn't be late!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Tornado then whistled away. She was hardly out of sight when there was suddenly a commotion going on around The Unknown Warrior and Alderman A. E. Draper.

**Alderman A. E. Draper:** Hey, what's going on?

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** There was lots of shouting going on at the nearest station and then moments later the alarm was raised.

**Man:** STOP ALL TRAINS!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** The signalman answered his ringing telephone.

**Signalman:** A 'special' special is it? I see.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Tornado was already at the station and she was feeling impatient.

**Tornado:** _(crossly)_ Why are we waiting?! My passengers are being delayed!

**Tornado's Driver:** Sorry Tornado but we're being shunted to allow another special train to pass.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Tornado crossly steamed into a siding out of the way. She then heard an unfamiliar puffing sound. There was The Unknown Warrior with his headlamp swaying and his whistle blowing as he gathered speed and disappeared.

**Tornado:** _(huffily)_ Well bust my boiler!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** The next morning, Tornado was still fuming.

**Tornado:** Shunted! And when I was on my own special to, it's a disgrace!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Just then, The Unknown Warrior puffed up alongside her.

**The Unknown Warrior:** I'm sorry about last night Tornado. I was a 'special' special.

**Tornado:** _(huffily)_ Why?

**The Unknown Warrior:** Well, an important passenger arrived just as you left. He ordered a 'special' special train and Alderman A. E. Draper let me take it. We had a splendid run but…

**Tornado:** _(kindly)_ But it can make an engine nervous not to know the line.

**The Unknown Warrior:** Exactly! At a young age, you're such an expert Tornado. I think I can learn a lot from you.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** This made Tornado smile. She couldn't stay cross anymore and instead proceeded to tell The Unknown Warrior about even more splendid sights that he should go and see. Oh and if you think that's the end, well think again because there's actually something else you should know. Remember a few episodes age where we saw Earl of Mount Edgcumbe and Rood Ashton Hall re-enact the Dangerous Brothers? Well they actually decided to do a Dangerous Brothers stunt and it was all a tribute to one half of the actual Dangerous Brothers who recently passed away, the late Rik Mayall and may that genius bastard rest in peace So…here's how they got on.

_**(flashback)**_

**Earl of Mount Edgcumbe:** Alright ladies and gentlemen, since our original stunt with Rood Ashton Hall having his brakes disabled didn't quite go to plan, Rood Ashton Hall has now had his brakes reapplied so he can perform our main event which's the following! He will be fired out of this steam engine sized cannon, travelling through these two large scale windows, under this giant semi-circle of fire and finally through this tall brick wall, hahaha!

**Rood Ashton Hall:** _(shocked)_ I beg your pardon?!

_Earl of Mount Edgcumbe biffs into Rood Ashton Hall to shut him up. Rood Ashton Hall then biffs Earl of Mount Edgcumbe back, much to Earl of Mount Edgcumbe's anger._

**Earl of Mount Edgcumbe:** _(angrily)_ Careful!

**Rood Ashton Hall:** Careful!

**Earl of Mount Edgcumbe:** _(angrily)_ Careful!

**Rood Ashton Hall:** Careful!

**Earl of Mount Edgcumbe:** _(angrily)_ In the cannon!

**Rood Ashton Hall:** In the cannon!

**Earl of Mount Edgcumbe:** He's off his rocker you know.

**Rood Ashton Hall:** I'm completely off my rocker!

_Rood Ashton Hall reverses and changes tracks so he can puff backwards into the cannon._

**Earl of Mount Edgcumbe:** Now then ladies and gentlemen, all that remains for me to do's to light the fuse!

_Earl of Mount Edgcumbe reverses into position alongside the cannon. The sunlight reflecting off his brass dome shines onto the fuse and eventually lights it._

**Earl of Mount Edgcumbe:** And now I need to get to a safe distance!

_Earl of Mount Edgcumbe reverses away from the cannon as it fires._

**Earl of Mount Edgcumbe:** Whoa, and there Rood Ashton Hall goes ladies and gentlemen, through…the…

_Earl of Mount Edgcumbe realises that Rood Ashton Hall's still inside the cannon._

**Rood Ashton Hall:** _(coughs through the smoke from the cannon)_ Oh god.

**Earl of Mount Edgcumbe:** _(angrily)_ You bastard! Get outta there!

_Rood Ashton Hall slowly steams out of the cannon._

**Earl of Mount Edgcumbe:** There he goes ladies and gentlemen, through the window!

**Rood Ashton Hall:** Through the window!

_Rood Ashton Hall smashes through the first window._

**Earl of Mount Edgcumbe:** Through the other window!

**Rood Ashton Hall:** Through the window!

_Rood Ashton Hall smashes through the second window._

**Earl of Mount Edgcumbe:** Under the semi-circle of fire!

**Rood Ashton Hall:** Through the semi-circle of fire!

_Rood Ashton Hall puffs under the semi-circle of fire._

**Earl of Mount Edgcumbe:** And through the brick wall!

**Rood Ashton Hall:** Through the brick wall!

_Rood Ashton Hall bounces off the brick wall as he wasn't going fast enough to go through it._

**Earl of Mount Edgcumbe:** No, no, through the brick wall!

**Rood Ashton Hall:** Through the brick wall!

_Rood Ashton Hall charges harder at the brick wall but again bounces off as he still wasn't going fast enough._

**Earl of Mount Edgcumbe and Rood Ashton Hall:** THROUGH THE BRICK WALL!

_This time, Rood Ashton Hall surges through the brick wall, knocking it down. This results in him being badly damaged from the front._

**Earl of Mount Edgcumbe:** Its been a fantastic evening, thank you and goodnight!

**_(End of flashback)_**

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** _(confused)_ How did they come up with that sort of cannon anyway?

**And that's episode 88/episode 15 of T&FMLA Series 4 done! Hope you enjoyed my parody of TTTE episode **_**'Thomas and Stepney'**_**. Please review and I request criticism. And on that bombshell, it's time to end, thanks very much for reading, goodnight!**


	16. Events on the Night of the Full Moon

**Tonight - Mayflower can't push a train, Duke of Gloucester tells a scary story and Sovereign's eager to get out of here.**

_**Tornado and Friends Mainline Adventures**_

Hello readers of this not very good and not so popular fanfic series, this' Olton Hall, aka Hogwarts Castle here and I think it's fair to say we get a lot of ghost stories in Thomas. And to be fair, we've had our fair share of ghost stories that came out in almost the exact same way. This one for today's episode's a prime example as Duke of Gloucester tried to get back at Sovereign for teasing Gauge O Guild about an accident he had. How'd all this pan out? Well find out now as I narrate what turned out to be our version of TTTE episode _'Duncan Gets Spooked'_. Enjoy!

**This episode stars:**

**LMS 8F no.48151 **_**'Gauge O Guild'**_** and his footplate crew**

**LNER B1 no.61306 **_**'Mayflower'**_

**LMS Black 5 no.44871 **_**'Sovereign'**_** and her footplate crew**

**BR Standard Class 8 no.71000 **_**'Duke of Gloucester'**_

**The Fat Director**

**The Troublesome Trucks**

Episode 89: Events on the Night of the Full Moon

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** One day, the engines were busy clearing the tracks of leaves and broken branches from the storm that had happened the previous night. Gauge O Guild was taking one long train of trucks containing logs. However, he had to stop because he was low on water and if he continued steaming on, his tanks would run on empty before he reached the next water tower. Mayflower was sent to push him and his trucks to the nearest water tower. She puffed up from behind.

**Mayflower:** Run out of water have we Gauge O Guild?

**Gauge O Guild:** Never mind about that Mayflower, just push me to the water tower will you.

**Mayflower:** Alright, alright.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Mayflower buffered up to the back of the train. She pushed and pushed but her wheels spun and spun. It was when she stopped pushing that Gauge O Guild realised something.

**Gauge O Guild:** _(sheepishly)_ Oops, sorry Mayflower, I left my brakes on.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Mayflower rolled her eyes in annoyance. When Gauge O Guild finally released his brakes, Mayflower was now able to push him and his train down the track. Pushing hard, she eventually managed to get Gauge O Guild to the nearest water tower which was on a hill.

**Gauge O Guild:** Thank you Mayflower!

**Mayflower:** _(puffing away)_ Just remember to fill up with water when you go to work Gauge O Guild you big old prick!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Gauge O Guild just sighed at Mayflower's words. He was soon feeling much happier as he enjoyed his long drink, however the trucks were feeling rather bored.

**Trucks:** _(giggling)_ Lets break away!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** The trucks' loads were heavy and their couplings were old. They eventually got the one that linked the first truck to Gauge O Guild to snap. Gauge O Guild felt something from behind him and wondered what was going on. He then gasped as he heard the trucks running away from him laughing loudly.

**Trucks:** _(shouts)_ Faster, faster!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** After rounding a bend, there was a sign that read 'Slow, steep bends and ravine ahead'. However, the silly little bastards never saw it. And then, when they reached the next bridge, it was too late. The leading truck derailed and plunged over the side of the bridge taking the other trucks with it. They all fell down and splashed into the ravine below. Driving carefully as he was going tender first, Gauge O Guild quickly arrived at the scene of the disaster. His driver sighed as he looked down at the destruction.

**Gauge O Guild's Driver:** This was our fault because we didn't secure them properly. We'll have to get help to pull them out. The Fat Director's going of be very annoyed.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** And indeed he was as Gauge O Guild found out that evening in the yards.

**The Fat Director:** _(angrily)_ Gauge O Guild, you won't be pulling any trains whatsoever and you'll be staying here in the yards until I can trust you again!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** And then he stomped away leaving Gauge O Guild feeling very miserable. Duke of Gloucester felt sorry for him. Sovereign though was delighted with Gauge O Guild's dilemma.

**Sovereign:** Fancy not securing your trucks on a hill eh Gauge O Guild? They're going to come back to spook you and your eight driving wheels. Ooo-ooo-ooo!

**Duke of Gloucester:** _(snaps)_ And who's to say that you're not afraid of ghosts!

**Sovereign:** Pah, ghosts, things that go bump in the night, rubbish!

**Duke of Gloucester:** Then I'll tell you a story that'll make your funnel quiver.

_**(Start of story)**_

**Duke of Gloucester:** _(voiceover)_ A long time ago, a steam engine was returning home. It was a misty moon at night. As the engine was crossing the bridge he suddenly lost control and plunged over the side into the swamps below. He was never found again but many a workman will tell you that when the moon was full they had seen the steam engine trying to get home but he never reaches the other side.

_**(End of story)**_

**Duke of Gloucester:** So what do you think of that Sovereign?

**Sovereign:** Pah, nonsense!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Sovereign then whistled out of the yard.

**Duke of Gloucester:** Never mind her Gauge O Guild, she'd be frightened if she really saw a ghost.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** This then gave Gauge O Guild's driver an idea.

**Gauge O Guild's Driver:** _(to Gauge O Guild's fireman)_ Eh mate, lets play a trick on Sovereign.

**Gauge O Guild's Fireman:** Ooh yeah, good idea, get back at her for teasing our engine.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** The next morning, they spoke to Sovereign's driver and fireman who agreed.

**Sovereign's Driver and Fireman:** We'll do it tonight.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** For today's work, Sovereign had to take some coal trucks to the fuel depot and then bring the fuel trucks back. Her driver had decided that part of the plan was to cross the very same bridge that Gauge O Guild had that mishap yesterday. As they crossed it, Sovereign wasn't happy.

**Sovereign:** _(snorts)_ This old bridge, pah! It's as tame as a pet rabbit!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** But all the same, she was constantly thinking about Duke of Gloucester's story. She soon arrived at the fuel depot. When dusk began to fall, she was keen to get going.

**Sovereign:** If we don't go now guys, my favourite sleeping spot in the sheds will surely be taken by a thoughtless engine!

**Sovereign's Driver:** Patience's a virtue Sovereign. We can't go back until we've collected all the trucks.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** The driver could see that the plan was working because Sovereign was now looking rather nervous. They finally set off with the fuel trucks when it was night time. The moon was full and the mists were rising around that very bridge. Sovereign whistled and the sound of it echoed everywhere. She then cautiously puffed onto the bridge. Suddenly, she stopped as she saw flickering lights up in front of her. Her driver knew that they were only little insects that shine brightly at night which go by the name of the firefly but to Sovereign they looked like an engine. As they then flew away, the driver secretly threw a rock from the cab into the ravine below. That was enough to startle Sovereign into pure fright.

**Sovereign:** _(terrified)_ It's the ghost! Take me back, take me back, please!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Sovereign's driver happily obliged as he rotated the reverser to the minus setting and then opened the regulator. Sovereign hastily puffed backwards off the bridge. The driver and fireman's plan had worked tremendously and that'll serve Sovereign right the bitch! By the time Sovereign reached the safety of an empty shed, she closed her eyes tightly.

**Sovereign's Driver:** _(laughs)_ Spooked are you Sovereign?

**Sovereign:** _(wails)_ No, I'm asleep!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Sovereign refused to open her eyes. She did though when she thought her driver wasn't looking, just to make sure that he was still there.

**And that's episode 89/episode 16 of T&FMLA Series 4 done! Hope you enjoyed my parody of TTTE episode **_**'Duncan Gets Spooked'**_**. Please review, I request criticism and I apologise if it's a bit short. And on that bombshell, it's time to end, thanks very much for reading, goodnight!**


	17. The Holiday Trip

**Tonight - some children do some singing, a coach gets insulted and a canal boat tries to go ashore.**

_**Tornado and Friends Mainline Adventures**_

Hello readers of this not very good and not so popular fanfic series, this' Olton Hall, aka Hogwarts Castle here and for the first time ever in the run of this series, we're having an episode that isn't based on an engine. You see, our fatso of a director decided to take his wife and grandchildren on a summer holiday. However, they ran into problems when they went on a journey down a river in a canal boat. Oh and they also encountered Lion Fly the bi-plane. What happened exactly? Well find out now as I narrate what turned out to be our version of TTTE episode _'Sir Topham Hatt's Holiday'_. Enjoy!

**This episode stars:**

**The Fat Director and his Family**

**SR Schools Class no.30926 **_**'Repton'**_

**Metropolitan Railway E Class no.1 **_**'Met 1'**_**, his driver and his faithful Metropolitan Railway carriage **_**'Jubilee'**_

**Class 55 Deltic Diesel no.55 002 **_**'Kings Own Yorkshire Light Infantry'**_** (KOYLI, pronounced Coy-Lee)**

**Class 55 Deltic Diesel no.55 022 **_**'Royal Scots Grey'**_

**Kayla the Class 56 Grid Diesel and her Driver**

**Harry the Helicopter and his Pilot**

**Lion Fly's Pilot**

**Some Children**

Episode 90: The Holiday Trip

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** _(sighs happily)_ Ah the summer holidays. It's a great time of the year and it keeps us engines very busy indeed...well, except me obviously as I'm now stuck in this blithering museum! But it keeps all my friends busy though. I mean, take Repton for example. She's often been kept busy by taking children on trips around this time of the year. On this day for instance, she was taking some school children to the seaside. The children were all very excited and they'd often sing a very recognisable song about their trip.

_(The Children sing TTTE song 'Percy's Seaside Trip', see if you can spot the differences)_

_The sun is shining, it's a lovely day._

_It won't be long before we're on our way._

_The guard is waiting, flag in hand._

_He blows his whistle, we're off to sea and sand._

_The sky is blue, there's not a cloud in sight,_

_So much excitement, didn't sleep all night._

_Now Repton's rushing through the countryside,_

_With people waving as we (Repton: PEEP-PEEP!) whistle by._

_Seaside, we're off to the seaside._

_Ice cream in cones,_

_Candy floss on your nose._

_Seaside, we're off to the seaside._

_We're gonna have a lovely day._

_Just one more bend to round and we'll be there._

_Sounds of the seaside start to fill the air._

_Then someone shouts out excitedly,_

"_Look over there everybody, I can see the sea!"_

_Seaside, we're off to the seaside._

_Buckets and spades, all the fairground arcades._

_Seaside, we're off to the seaside._

_We're gonna have a lovely day._

_And when it's cold in winter time,_

_Still you can be there anytime._

_Just close your eyes, count 1-2-3,_

_Dream your dream and once again be by the sea._

_The mainline boss arrives to greet the train._

_He is so pleased that Repton's right on time._

_So much excitement, so much glee._

_We're all together with Repton by the sea._

_Seaside, we're all at the seaside._

_Building sandcastles with bucket and spades._

_Seaside, we're all at the seaside._

_Oh, what a lovely, lovely day._

_Seaside, we're all at the seaside._

_Picnics and paddling, swimming all day._

_Seaside, we're all at the seaside._

_Oh, what a lovely, lovely day._

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** And when it was time to go home…

_Thank you Repton for such a lovely day._

_Hooray!_

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** I'll be honest with you, I don't really know why it's Repton that always got those sort of jobs.

**Repton:** _(crossly)_ Err, hello, it's because I'm Schools Class engine Olton Hall you brainless berk!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Alright, alright, jeez! Thank goodness this episode's not about you.

**Repton:** _(angrily)_ Oh for fu…

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Anyway, one summers morning, the Fat Director had arranged with Met 1 to take his wife and grandchildren to the seaside. The sun was shining brightly and everything was looking splendid. However, Mrs Walkers was feeling hot and tired and she had decided to take her troubles out on Met 1's faithful coach Jubilee.

**Mrs Walkers:** That carriage's old and uncomfortable! Why don't you just use it as a beach hut instead!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Jubilee felt hurt by those words and Met 1 was most upset.

**Met 1:** _(hurtfully)_ You won't let them turn Jubilee into a beach hut will you?

**Met 1's Driver:** Of course not Met 1. I must admit though that she could be smartened up.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** The next day, the Fat Director used KOYLI to take his family to Harry the Helicopter's airfield. With a honk of his horn, KOYLI soon arrived.

**KOYLI:** Here we are sir.

**The Fat Director:** Thank you KOYLI.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** The Fat Director and his family got off the train and made their way towards Harry. They were just about to board him, when it happened. A bi-plane was flying low and it flew straight over their heads, only narrowly missing them. The bi-place then headed into the skies again but the family were lying on the ground gasping for breath.

**The Fat Director:** _(gasping)_ What was that?!

**Harry:** _(grumbles)_ That was Lion Fly. Ever since it got a new pilot, it has been rude by flying much too low, for which I'm blaming the pilot because I'm pretty sure he's doing that on purpose.

**The Fat Director:** I see what you mean about it flying much too low Harry. Now please take us up before there's another disturbance!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** A few days later, Harry arrived at the families holiday home with bad news.

**Harry's Pilot:** It's Lion Fly sir, its gone missing. Do you wish to join the search with us?

**The Fat Director:** I think I'd better, especially since I want a word with its pilot.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** The Fat Director was soon up high in the sky with Harry. They searched all across the country for Lion Fly, left and right, high and low. They searched and searched until…

**The Fat Director:** _(calls)_ There's Lion Fly!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** And he was right. He could see that Lion Fly had crashed into a haystack. Harry then landed alongside. The Fat Director could see that Lion Fly's pilot was unhurt but he was still angry at him for flying dangerously in the first place.

**The Fat Director:** _(angrily)_ You were showing off and flying dangerously! I shall speak to your controller and request that you're grounded!

**Lion Fly's Pilot:** Yes sir.

**The Fat Director:** Now if you excuse me, I shall return to my holiday!

**Lion Fly's Pilot:** Jolly good idea sir.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** The Fat Director then got back onboard Harry who then took off into the skies once again. That afternoon, the Fat Director had arranged to meet up with Royal Scots Grey to take him and his family somewhere 'special'.

**Mrs Walkers:** Where're you taking us dear?

**The Fat Director:** You'll see love, you'll see.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Royal Sots Grey didn't even know where he was going to take his important passengers. He soon found out though when he was asked to stop by a small river inlet.

**Royal Scots Grey:** So you're taking your family on a ride down a river eh sir? I hope you enjoy yourself.

**The Fat Director:** Thank you Royal Scots Grey.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** As Royal Scots Grey whirred away, the Fat Director led his family to the canal boat that they were going to be using. The family were delighted when they saw it.

**Grandchildren:** _(exclaims)_ What a beautiful boat!

**The Fat Director:** It's my special treat.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Once onboard the boat, the Fat Director took the helm with his wife beside him.

**The Fat Director:** It's so nice to be away from the railway for once.

**Mrs Walkers:** And far cleaner.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** As they set off though, they didn't know that life on the river was very different from that on the rails. The boat sailed gracefully down the river, past countryside and under bridges. However, the family were enjoying themselves so much that they forgot to watch where they were going. Before they knew it, their boat was crashing into a mud bank alongside the rails.

**The Fat Director:** Botheration, we're stuck!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** And indeed they were. When they called for help, other boats tried to pull them off the mud bank but it was all to no avail. Just then, Kayla saw the commotion and stopped wondering what was going on.

**Kayla:** Oh dear, it looks like sir has got himself and his family into a problem.

**Kayla's Driver:** _(calls)_ Is there anything we can do to help sir?

**The Fat Director:** Yes indeed there is!

…

**The Fat Director:** This' the life, isn't it dear?

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Actually he and his family were on the boat which was now on a breakdown truck which was coupled up to a breakdown crane which was being pushed by Kayla. Therefore I've got no idea why Fatso decided to say that. If he said it for humour then I didn't really find it funny, our writer found it funny but personally I didn't. Anyway, Kayla brought them to a small station. Met 1 was already there with Jubilee who was looking as smart as her new bronze paint inside and out.

**Mrs Walkers:** _(exclaims)_ My, what a splendid carriage, it's so much more suitable than that old beach hut on wheels!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** No one said a word as the family got onboard Jubilee and Met 1 then whistled out of the station. That evening though, Jubilee spoke to Met 1.

**Jubilee:** It's very nice to get compliments but no matter what I look like, I'll always be useful won't I Met 1?

**Met 1:** _(smiles)_ Of course you'll always be useful Jubilee.

**And that's episode 90/episode 17 of T&FMLA Series 4 done! Hope you enjoyed my parody of TTTE episode **_**'Sir Topham Hatt's Holiday'**_**. Please review and I request criticism. And on that bombshell, it's time to end, thanks very much for reading, goodnight!**


	18. A Surprise for Prairie

**Tonight - Prairie's feeling bored, the troublesome trucks have a little singsong and Clun Castle has a suggestion.**

_**Tornado and Friends Mainline Adventures**_

Hello readers of this not very good and not so popular fanfic series, this' Olton Hall, aka Hogwarts Castle here and you might followers of this series may've known by now that the tank engines we have on the mainline are often used for shunting duties. My little friend Prairie's one such example. On one such occasion though, she was getting bored and lonely of shunting troublesome trucks in the coal yards. She really was feeling down in the dumps with pure boredom. However one day, she got a really big surprise from those damn trucks. What happened exactly? Well find out now as I narrate what turned out to be our version of TTTE episode _'A Surprise for Percy'_. Enjoy!

**This episode stars:**

**GWR 4575 Class no.5521/London Transport no.L150 (who we named Prairie) and her driver**

**GWR Castle no.7029 **_**'Clun Castle'**_

**Amara the Traction Engine**

**Roberto the Bus**

**The Fat Director**

**A Yard Foreman**

**The Troublesome Trucks**

Episode 91: A Surprise for Prairie

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Prairie had been shunting in the coal yards. She was bored and lonely with only those little bastards known as trucks keeping her company.

**Prairie's Driver:** Cheer up Prairie, the Fat Director has told me that we must be here again tomorrow. We've just got to make the best of a bad situation.

**Prairie:** _(sighs)_ I'll try sir.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** The next morning, Prairie puffed back to the coal yards. When she arrived however, the trucks started to tease her.

**Trucks:** _(teasingly in song)_ Prairie, Prairie, red and small! She's no use to us at all! Around them yards she'll puff and blow but on them hills she's oh so slow!

**Prairie:** _(furiously)_ BE QUIET!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Prairie then biffed the truck in front of her really hard indeed. She then took it along with some others to the coal hopper to be loaded up with…well, coal, obviously. When that was done, Prairie took them out of the coal yards and onto the mainline. Prairie was still feeling glum but she said nothing as she puffed up the steep Lickey Incline to the next coal yard where the trucks were needed. Upon arrival at the next coal yard, she parked her trucks and then set off back down to the other coal yard. At a level crossing, not even the cheerful sight of Amara the Traction Engine could being a smile to Prairie's face.

**Amara:** Hello Prairie. My you do look glum, what's the matter?

**Prairie:** _(sighs)_ Nothing exciting ever happens, that's the matter Amara! It's just coal, coal, coal and trucks, trucks, trucks and I'm bored, bored, bored!

**Amara:** _(observant)_ Excitement's surprising because you'll never know when it'll happen. Otherwise it wouldn't be exciting.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** With a cheerful toot of her whistle, Amara trundled slowly away.

**Prairie:** _(mutters)_ It'd be surprising if something surprising happened.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Later she was returning to the first coal yard after making another delivery to the second coal yard. She stopped by the water tower for a drink. The water was just pouring into her tanks when Clun Castle puffed alongside her.

**Clun Castle:** Hello little Prairie, how're things going with you then?

**Prairie:** Boring.

**Clun Castle:** Well why not have a few fast spins of a turntable. I think you'll like that.

**Prairie:** I think I'll just feel giddy.

**Prairie's Driver:** Alright you two, that's enough gossiping! Your tanks are now filled Prairie so we'd better get going.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Prairie then began to puff away.

**Clun Castle:** _(calls)_ Cheer up Prairie, you'll soon know more about trucks than any other engine and THAT'LL be exciting!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Prairie heard Clun Castle's words but she really didn't seem to think so. When Prairie returned to the first coal yard, the little bastards were still grumbling and there was more of them than ever.

**Trucks:** You're much too slow to pull all of us so we want another engine or we'll be struggling up that hill all night! All night, alright, you can puff and blow, but on that hill you're still too slow!

**Prairie:** _(stutters angrily)_ S-S-S-Slow yourself!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Prairie then biffed the nearest trucks very hard in pure fury.

**Trucks:** _(giggles)_ Temper, temper!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Prairie decided just to carry on as she went to organise the trucks needed for her next trip to the second coal yard. She was now feeling very fed up indeed. When the trucks were ready, she was coupled up to them and then, going bunker first, she began yet another journey to the second coal yard. All was going well at first but then they approached the Lickey Incline.

**Prairie's Driver:** _(shouts)_ Go to it Prairie!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Prairie then started to climb the incline. However the trucks were still joking.

**Trucks:** _(teasingly)_ Too slow, more power, here all night, tomorrow to!

**Prairie:** _(angrily)_ BE QUIET!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Then there was trouble. At about just over half way up, Prairie suddenly felt herself starting to slow down and her wheels starting to slip. The front coupling then suddenly broke which shot Prairie backwards. The trucks were delighted by this.

**Trucks:** Surprise, surprise! Catch us if you can!

**Prairie:** _(cries)_ Oh bollocks!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Prairie could only watch helplessly as the trucks rolled away from her and their speed was ever increasing. They shot past the level crossing which gave a waiting Roberto quite a shock. Prairie raced back down the incline. Roberto watched as Prairie stopped at the signal box that was next to the level crossing. Prairie's driver told the signalman who then called the yard foreman. The yard foreman then went to tell the Fat Director about what was happening.

**Yard Foreman:** They're heading for the big hill! It'll slow them down but they might roll back down again and right into the nearest village!

**The Fat Director:** _(firmly)_ Then we're just gonna have to stop those little bastards aren't we?

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** The Fat Director headed out of his office and into his car. With a mighty rev of the engine, he raced off in pursuit of the runaway trucks. When he zipped past Roberto, the bus decided to follow and Prairie was also in the chase on the rails. The chase was now well and truly on! At this point on the road, the Fat Director and Roberto could now see the trucks on front of them. As they approached the hill, they overtook the trucks. The Fat Director and Roberto then quickly screeched to a halt and waited for them near the top. The Fat Director was pleased to see that the workmen he'd sent to help them had already arrived on the scene and that they were carrying the wooden blocks he suggested. As the trucks got further up the hill, the slower they were going. The hill eventually slowed the trucks right down to a standstill, right alongside the waiting Fat Director, Roberto and the workmen. With the trucks stopped, the workmen quickly placed the wooden blocks behind their wheels so they couldn't roll backwards. The trucks were now secured. Just then, Prairie whistled in onto the scene.

**Roberto:** _(jokingly)_ Well after what Amara told me earlier today, what did you think of that then Prairie, a good chase's always exciting isn't it eh?

**Prairie:** Phew, it certainly was a surprise. And I guess Amara was right Roberto, a really useful engine should never be surprised by surprise.

**And that's episode 91/episode 18 of T&FMLA Series 4 done! Hope you enjoyed my parody of TTTE episode **_**'A Surprise for Percy'**_**. Please review, I request criticism and I apologise if it's a bit short. And on that bombshell, it's time to end, thanks very much for reading, goodnight!**


	19. Old Truck

**Tonight - some coupling rods gets broken, we meet a new road character and a driver reinvents football.**

_**Tornado and Friends Mainline Adventures**_

Hello readers of this not very good and not so popular fanfic series, this' Olton Hall, aka Hogwarts Castle here and I'll tell you now, my sister Pitchford Hall loves taking specials, whether it's passengers or goods. She had to take a special goods train to the docks once. Unfortunately though because the load was very heavy, it eventually led to a problem. What sort of problem was it exactly I hear you ask? Well find out now as I narrate what turned out to be our version of TTTE episode _'Elizabeth the Vintage Lorry'_. Enjoy!

**This episode stars:**

**GWR Hall no.4953 **_**'Pitchford Hall'**_** and her footplate crew**

**Tennille the Class 08 Shunting Diesel**

**Eliza the Vintage Steam Lorry**

**The Fat Director**

Episode 92: Old Truck

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** My sister Pitchford Hall loves taking specials. Today, she was taking a special goods train to the docks. The special load inside the trucks was to go onto a cargo ship which was to depart at sundown. Pitchford Hall had to deliver the special train to the docks before the ship departed. The load however was very heavy. Pitchford Hall was a strong engine though so she wasn't really having any problems…or so she thought. Pitchford Hall was puffing hard as she took the train down the track when suddenly her wheels slipped which caused a loud CRACK! Pitchford Hall had broken her coupling rods and she wasn't going any further for the moment.

**Pitchford Hall:** _(groans)_ Oh dear, now I'm going to be late!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Just then, her driver spotted an old shed next to the track.

**Pitchford Hall's Driver:** If there's a telephone inside that shed then I could call for help.

**Pitchford Hall:** Hurry, and be careful, it looks a bit spooky!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Pitchford Hall really didn't like the look of this shed one bit as she watched her driver and fireman walk through the creaky doors. A few moments later, Pitchford Hall heard a voice from inside the shed.

Do you mind, I'm trying to sleep!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Pitchford Hall hoped that voice didn't belong to a ghost. She was relieved when her driver appeared from the doors.

**Pitchford Hall:** _(nervously)_ Is it a ghost?

**Pitchford Hall's Driver:** _(teasingly)_ It's a surprise.

**Pitchford Hall:** _(crossly)_ Don't tease me like that you bastard!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Pitchford Hall's driver just laughed off his engines insult. Using a wheelbarrow, the fireman then collected some of Pitchford Hall's coal from her tender and then wheeled it back to the shed.

**Pitchford Hall:** Hey, what're you doing with my coal?!

**Pitchford Hall's Fireman:** Wait and see, wait and see.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Once back inside the shed, the driver and fireman were thinking about what they'd just found.

**Pitchford Hall's Driver:** She could get us to the fitters yard.

**Pitchford Hall's Fireman:** _(anxiously)_ If her boiler holds.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Outside, Pitchford Hall was wondering what her footplate crew were up to inside the shed. Just then, she heard a noise of what sounding like an old lorry engine.

**Pitchford Hall:** _(wonders)_ What kind of surprise's that?

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** She soon found out as her driver appeared from the shed again.

**Pitchford Hall's Driver:** Pitchford Hall, meet Eliza!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** He then opened the shed doors and with the fireman at the wheel, out chuffed a dirty and grimy steam lorry.

**Eliza:** _(sniffs)_ So you're the old puffer that has broken down.

**Pitchford Hall:** _(retorts crossly)_ And you're just an old sentinel lorry!

**Eliza:** _(snaps)_ That would be VINTAGE sentinel lorry! And I haven't much time to get your coupling rods!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** With a honk of her horn, Eliza then rode away. Pitchford Hall's fireman was acting as her driver for the journey and he was concerned because as Eliza drove along, she was making some awful grinding sounds.

**Pitchford Hall's Fireman:** _(anxiously)_ She's not built for hills.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Just as he said this, they came up to a hill.

**Pitchford Hall's Fireman:** _(calls)_ You're loosing steam!

**Eliza:** _(chuffs)_ Just, catching my breath!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Eventually though, she made it to the top of the hill. She then carried on down the road towards the fitters yard. Back with Pitchford Hall meanwhile, her driver and looking around the shed in amazement.

**Pitchford Hall's Driver:** _(amazed)_ Just look at all this stuff! In fact there're tone of old but still inflated footballs in here!

**Pitchford Hall:** _(confused)_ Footballs?

**Pitchford Hall's Driver:** _(appears from the shed door)_ Oh yeah, loads of them!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Just then, they spotted some children playing some football in the nearby field.

**Pitchford Hall's Driver:** Mmm, you know something, with everything I've been able to find in the shed, as a part time inventor, I might be able to come up with something that can make the game of football even more exciting.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** He then went back inside the shed and started work immediately. Pitchford Hall was left wondering what her driver was coming up with. While waiting, she watched the children playing their football game. A couple of hours later, the driver finished his invention but came out of the shed on his own. A confused Pitchford Hall watched as her driver made his way to the children. The children were willing to let him join in the game. The driver said he'll join on if it was only him against the goalkeeper. The children agreed as the goalkeeper made his way between the goalposts.

**Pitchford Hall's Driver:** You're gonna have to be on your toes today lad!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** The goalkeeper then rolled the ball over to the driver.

**Pitchford Hall's Driver:** Wa-hey, haha. Watch out for me Nobby Styles lad!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** He has a shot but the goalkeeper saves the ball which rolls back to the driver.

**Pitchford Hall's Driver:** Tom Finney!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Saved.

**Pitchford Hall's Driver:** It's a rocket from Geoff Hurst!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Saved.

**Pitchford Hall's Driver:** Bill Shankly!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Saved.

**Pitchford Hall's Driver:** _(exhausted)_ Stanley Matthews!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Saved.

**Pitchford Hall's Driver:** _(surprised)_ Ruddy heck!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** The children and even Pitchford Hall were now all laughing at him.

**Pitchford Hall:** _(laughs)_ You really are rubbish at football you know! You're worse than Manchester United!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** The driver though was having none of it as he caught his breath.

**Pitchford Hall's Driver:** Well, now that you're properly warmed up, I think it's time we moved up a division.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** He then walked into the shed to fetch his invention. As he pushed it out, Pitchford Hall and the children all gasped at the sight of it. The driver then took his place on the inventions seat and then started it up. A ring of football boots began to go round in a circle and then a tube of footballs tilted forward opening the flap at the front. The footballs then fell out and the rotating boots then kicked them forcefully at the goal. The poor goalkeeper had to duck to avoid being hit by the flying balls. The driver was loving this though.

**Pitchford Hall's Driver:** Haha, smashing! What do you think of my Soccamatic Machine lad?! Works a treat doesn't it eh?! _(checks the machines handbook) _It's guaranteed, all the goals and none of the fuss!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Just then he spotted that no footballs were being fired at the goal.

**Pitchford Hall's Driver:** Oh heck, I'm out of balls. _(he pulls a lever)_ No need to worry, there's plenty more where they came from.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** By pulling that lever, the second tube of footballs is moved into position but is not tilted.

**Pitchford Hall's Driver:** Get ready la…oh?!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** The driver could now see that the children had come up with something of their own for the goalkeeper. He was now wearing an inflatable shirt. The goalkeeper pulled the cord and then the shirt inflated and he grew and grew bigger and bigger until he was completely covering the goal, much to the drivers shock.

**Pitchford Hall's Driver:** Oh, now that's simply not cricket lad! _(picks up a spare tennis racquet and tennis ball)_ Anyone for tennis per chance?

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Before the children could answer though, they heard the honking of a horn. It was Eliza with Pitchford Hall's new coupling rods. The children decided to go home and the driver thought it best that no more was said about his Soccamatic invention so he pushed it back into the shed and just left it there. As Eliza grinded her way in, she was feeling very pleased with herself.

**Eliza:** _(scolds)_ And next time, don't be so careless!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Pitchford Hall thought Eliza was the rudest lorry she'd ever met. She was very happy to receive her new coupling rods though. When the driver and fireman attached them, they hopped into the cab and Pitchford Hall carried on her journey en route for the docks. The Fat Director was already docks and he was wondering where Pitchford Hall was. Tennille was also there wondering the exact same thing. Just then, they heard a familiar whistle.

**Tennille:** Here she comes sir!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Tennille was right as in puffed an exhausted Pitchford Hall just in time.

**The Fat Director:** What took you so long Pitchford Hall?!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Pitchford Hall told him about her broken coupling rods. She had been wanting to tell him about how rude Eliza had been. But there was no need because she then suddenly rode up with a new driver.

**Eliza:** _(looks down at the Fat Director)_ Oh, it's you, have you learnt to drive properly yet?

**Pitchford Hall:** _(to her driver)_ She's for it now.

**The Fat Director:** _(happily)_ Eliza, my first lorry, I thought you'd been lost!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** It turned out that they had been old friends. It was too much for my sister who was absolutely livid! Eliza then told the Fat Director how she'd been left in that shed for many years. The Fat Director was so pleased that Eliza had been found that he asked John Pole to restore her to her original beauty. A few days later, Pitchford Hall brought the Fat Director to see the new look Eliza. She had a rich dark shade of red and gleaming coachworks.

**The Fat Director:** _(proudly)_ You're the grandest lorry in the whole country let alone working alongside the mainline.

**Eliza:** _(even more proudly)_ I know.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** And you know something, my sister had to admit that she did indeed look grand.

**And that's episode 92/episode 19 of T&FMLA Series 4 done! Hope you enjoyed my parody of TTTE episode **_**'Elizabeth the Vintage Lorry'**_**. Please review and I request criticism. And on that bombshell, it's time to end, thanks very much for reading, goodnight!**


	20. Olton Hall and the Story of the Tree

**Tonight - the narrator tells another one of her tales, some trucks get pushed off the rails and a tree stands on the tracks.**

_**Tornado and Friends Mainline Adventures**_

Hello readers of this not very good and not so popular fanfic series, this' Olton Hall, aka Hogwarts Castle here and…well for today, you've got another episode based on me. And I was in full James mode here because I was getting a new coat of paint when little Pannier felt he needed one. Naturally, being a celebrity engine, I don't really like hauling goods train even though I'm from a mixed traffic class of locomotive, so I was obviously very angry when Fatso gave me an 'important' goods train to take. I was such a fool at the end of it all though when I ran into an encounter with a tree of all things. What happened exactly? Well find out now as I narrate what turned out to be our version of TTTE episode _'James and the Trouble with Trees'_. Enjoy!

**This episode stars:**

**GWR 5700 Class no.7752/London Transport no.L94 (who we named Pannier) and his driver**

**GWR Hall no.5972 **_**'Olton Hall'**_** (Hogwarts Castle) and her driver**

**LMS Black 5 no.45305 **_**'Alderman A. E. Draper'**_

**GWR 5700 Class no.9600 (who we named Swindon)**

**BR Standard Class 7 Britannia no.70000 **_**'Britannia'**_

**Michelle the Tractor**

**The Fat Director**

**The Troublesome Trucks**

Episode 93: Olton Hall and the Story of the Tree

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Pannier had been working in the coal yards all day. The little red engine was covered on coal dust. He was hoping to have a wash down tonight but he was in for some bad news.

**Pannier's Driver:** We can't clean you up tonight Pannier because there's a problem with the hosepipe.

**Pannier:** Bollocks! A bath would make me feel much better! The others are bound to say that I look silly!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** However, when Pannier returned to the junction, we were all too busy arguing to notice him. I was talking loudest of all.

**Olton Hall:** _(boastfully)_ I deserve a new coat of paint! The Fat Director says I'm the pride of the line and…

**Alderman A. E. Draper:** _(huffs)_ Rubbish, we're all the pride of the line!

**Swindon:** _(confides)_ Its been like this all day bro. Olton Hall's getting a new coat of paint and she just won't stop boasting about it.

**Pannier:** Why Olton Hall?! I'm the one who needs a new coat of paint, I mean look at me!

**Olton Hall:** _(retorts)_ I'd rather not. You're not a pleasant sight and wouldn't understand the needs of a really important engine.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Pannier was fuming by my words. Geez I really was a bitch wasn't I eh? The next morning while I was undergoing my repaint, Alderman A. E. Draper had an accident. He had accidentally pushed some trucks hard into a set of buffers and derailed them. I was watching and I couldn't help but laugh.

**Olton Hall:** _(laughs)_ If you can't push trucks properly Alderman A. E. Draper, why not talk to a tree instead, we all know about how much you like the wildlife!

**Alderman A. E. Draper:** As a matter of fact bossy boiler, the Fat Director's inspecting the whole mainline for trees that are too close to the track because he's worried that they might cause trouble!

**Olton Hall:** Pah! If I came upon a tree, I'd just push it aside!

**Alderman A. E. Draper:** _(laughs)_ Really?

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** It wasn't long before I was showing off my smart new red paintwork. I approached Swindon, Pannier and Michelle who were gathering some logs.

**Olton Hall:** _(boastfully)_ Make way for an important engine!

**Swindon:** _(approaches)_ You wouldn't feel important if one of these trees here crashed on you because you'd feel hurt.

**Olton Hall:** Rubbish, it wouldn't dare!

**Michelle:** _(advises)_ You should be careful Olton Hall because trees can be just as powerful as engines.

**Olton Hall:** _(snorts)_ Pah! Now if you excuse me, the Fat Director needs me to pull the days big express!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** And with that, I huffed away. However, when I reached the station, it was here where I realised that I was wrong.

**The Fat Director:** You must go to the yards and collect an important goods train Olton Hall. It's heavy so be careful.

**Olton Hall:** _(indignantly)_ What?! But sir, I don't want to haul any goods train again because it destroys my reputation as a celebrity engine. Besides, I've just been repainted so can't any of my siblings do it because they're dirty and like working with trucks?!

**The Fat Director:** _(booms)_ Really useful engines don't argue so get going!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** So I did indeed get going without saying another word. And I cannot tell you how much I hate that fat twat right now! Anyway, by the time I arrived at the yards, the weather had changed for the worst.

**Trucks:** _(laughs)_ Your colour's nice Olton Hall, pity about your face though!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** So basically those trucks just called me ugly, how dare they! I just ignored them though and set off with my so called 'important' goods train. While on my journey as the rain poured down, I soon came to a hill and my driver knew that we were in for a difficult time. An old tree close to the track was being blown by the strong winds and the rain had weakened the slope it was on. All of a sudden, the tree moved. It was now on the track on the downward part of the hill. As I came over the top of the hill, I then spotted the tree standing on the track. I gasped in horror at the mere sight of it. My driver saw it to and quickly applied the brakes. I skidded along the wet rails but managed to stop just in front of the tree.

**Olton Hall:** _(cries)_ Ooh, help, go away!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Of course though, the tree couldn't. I tried to reverse away from the tree but the wet rails and the heavy trucks prevented me as my wheels spun. Just then, I heard a whistle. My driver looked back to see what it was.

**Olton Hall's Driver:** _(calls)_ It's Pannier!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** And indeed it was Pannier racing onto the scene. I felt very embarrassed and I felt sure that Pannier would laugh at me. But to my surprise he didn't because he knew that this was no time for teasing, especially since the tree had now started to rock back and forth, signalling that it was going to fall over at any point. Pannier was soon coupled up to the brake van at the back of the train.

**Pannier:** _(whistles)_ PEEP-PEEP, I'm ready!

**Olton Hall:** So am I, as ready as I'll ever be!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Working together, we started to reverse the train back up the hill. I watched and then gasped as the tree then started to fall towards me. Fortunately though, it just missed me, we were just in time as we continued to reverse away from the scene. That evening, I spoke to Pannier.

**Olton Hall:** Your brother Swindon and Michelle were right to warn me so thank you for rescuing me Pannier.

**Pannier:** Oh that's alright Olton Hall. We engines must pull together whatever the weather.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Just then, Britannia bustled in.

**Britannia:** The Fat Director asked me to tell you that he thinks that both of you have been very brave engines today. Pannier, you're going to get a new coat of paint. And Olton Hall, the Fat Director says that tomorrow, you'll pull the days big express.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** We were all very happy, but no more than me.

**And that's episode 93/episode 20 of T&FMLA Series 4 done! Hope you enjoyed my parody of TTTE episode **_**'James and the Trouble with Trees'**_**. Please review, I request criticism and I apologise if it's a bit short. And on that bombshell, it's time to end, thanks very much for reading, goodnight!**


	21. Stubborn as a Church Mouse

**Tonight - a load gets slammed onto a quayside, the narrators sister screams in panic and a crane gets toppled over…twice.**

_**Tornado and Friends Mainline Adventures**_

Hello readers of this not very good and not so popular fanfic series, this' Olton Hall, aka Hogwarts Castle here and as I told you from a previous episode, two of our three little diesel friends Korra and Claire have the Bill and Ben about them. Well they also have the Thomas and Percy about them to as today's episode proves. Basically trains were running late around the docks and Kong the Crane was complaining and by doing so was only making things worse for the engines. But then one stormy night at the docks, something dreadful happened. What happened exactly? Well find out now as I narrate what turned out to be our version of TTTE episode _'Cranky Bugs'_. Enjoy!

**This episode stars:**

**Kong the Crane**

**Korra the Class 11 Shunting Diesel**

**Claire the Class 12 Shunting Diesel**

**SR LN no.(30)850 **_**'Lord Nelson'**_

**GWR Hall no.4936 **_**'Kinlet Hall'**_

**LNER B1 no.61264 (who we named Thompson)**

**SR S15 no.(30)825 (who we named Maunsell)**

**The Fat Director**

Episode 94: Stubborn as a Church Mouse

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Korra and Claire enjoy working at the docks just as much as they work at the quarry. They like the sea air and the sound of the gulls. One day however, the BFFs were feeling hot and bothered. Trains had been running late to and fro from the docks lately and Kong the Crane was complaining about it by saying that the engines were to blame for this dilemma. Oh yeah Kong, blame us engines for things that we sometimes can't help!

**Kong:** _(calls)_ You two are useless little bugs! If you put these trucks on the inside lines then I wouldn't have so far to travel!

**Korra:** Rubbish! We always arrange our trucks like this and you previously never complained about where we put the trucks until this occurring lateness began!

**Kong:** _(calls)_ Well I'm complaining now!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** And keen to make himself quite clear, Kong dropped his load onto the quayside with a loud slam much to the shock of Korra and Claire. Later, the two shunting diesels met Lord Nelson and Kinlet Hall and told them about Kong's recent behaviour.

**Lord Nelson:** You see you two, cranes are very airy, fairy things and they need a lot of attention, like me in fact.

**Kinlet Hall:** _(huffs)_ You should see the situation from Kong's point of view. I mean, he's high up in the air coping with rain, wind and baking sun. Then he looks down and sees you two little buggers being annoying so it's no wonder he calls you bugs.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** When Kong heard that the big engines were siding with him, he decided to forgive them for their part in the lateness and chose to lay all the blame on Korra and Claire. Therefore, he grew bossier still towards the little diesels. Claire had just pushed some trucks onto the quayside for Kong to load up.

**Kong:** Come on, come on, push those trucks closer to me!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Unfortunately, Claire was to upset to concentrate and ended up pushing the trucks too far. When Claire stopped, Kong dropped his load and it crashed onto Claire's boiler, spoiling her paintwork. Kong laughed at the sight of poor Claire. Then, later on, Kong played a trick on Korra.

**Kong:** Move your trucks onto the outside line because it's easier for me to load up!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** So Korra did. When she was in place on the farthest line, Kong moved into position. However, he dropped his load onto the tracks and beside the trucks, not in them.

**Kong:** _(pretends to complain)_ You must've known that my arm can't reach you there!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Err Korra, I'd be careful if I were you.

**Korra:** Oh shut up you so called 'celebrity'.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** _(furiously)_ HEY, DON'T YOU TELL THE NARRATOR TO SHUT UP! AND BY THE NARRATOR, I MEAN ME SO DON'T YOU TELL ME TO SHUT UP BECAUSE I'LL STEAM MYSELF UP AGAIN AND…_(sees a sign saying 'If Olton Hall doesn't get on with it, she'll be scrapped')_ Err, anyway, this mix up caused confusion and delay…and I sincerely hope that I don't have to say that annoying catchphrase again! The Fat Director was most upset when he heard about the mix up and he called Korra and Claire over immediately.

**The Fat Director:** _(angrily)_ Korra and Claire, Kong has got very important work to do and I've heard that you've not been helping him today! Therefore, you'll now go to your sheds and figure out how you'll improve yourselves tomorrow!

**Claire:** What?!

**Korra:** But sir, we've been trying to help him but…

**The Fat Director:** _(furiously)_ No buts you two, now go!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Now, Korra and Claire were upset to. They decided to just head to their sheds and say no more about it. However, that night, a big storm was raging across the country. Kong along with Kinlet Hall, Lord Nelson, Thompson and Maunsell were trapped at the docks.

**Kinlet Hall:** We're sure to be safe in this shed boys.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** My sister was wrong though. The engines had no idea that they were about to be put in great danger by an old tramp steamer. It was out of control and running around straight into the sheds! The engines gasped in horror when they saw the tramp steamer heading straight towards them!

**Lord Nelson:** What the actual hell's that?!

**Maunsell:** Holy shit!

**Thompson:** Look out!

**Kinlet Hall:** _(screams in panic)_

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** The tramp steamer forged its way into the shed, knocking it down onto the engines, trapping them inside. The shed was also pushed over to the side and it was sent Kong teetering until he could no longer keep his balance.

**Kong:** A-A-AGH!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Kong had crash landed onto his side. As the storm started to settle down, the scene was an absolute mess with four engines trapped inside a broken shed and a crane fallen over onto its side.

**Engines:** HELP!

**Kong:** _(pathetically)_ I can't!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** When the storm finally ended, the Fat Director rushed to the scene of the destruction…and when I say he 'rushed' onto the scene, I do of course mean he used his car to get there, I mean he wouldn't race on foot you know, because he's overweight.

**The Fat Director:** _(angrily)_ I heard that Olton Hall, now shut up! _(calls to Kong)_ Korra and Claire can help you Kong and then you can help the engines!

**Kong:** _(cries)_ Oh please hurry and tell them I'm sorry I was rude to them!

**The Fat Director:** _(murmurs)_ So it was you? I suppose I owe those diesels an apology.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Korra and Claire soon came to the rescue. And it wasn't too long before Kong was upright again and clearing the wreckage. With his hook attached to the shed roof, he lifted it off of the engines. At last, the trapped engines were free.

**Lord Nelson:** Ooh, thank you. What would I've done without you?

**Kong:** Well I had to be rescued before I could help you. But I never thought it would be by a couple of bu…bu…

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Kong was able to say bugs but he quickly corrected himself.

**Kong:** Ah small engines, thank you. I'll never be rude again, however you two 'mites' are in my way so, move over.

**Claire:** _(snorts)_ Pah! Why does that tall moron have to be as stubborn as a church mouse, now he's just gone back to bugging us!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Claire began to back up when Korra realised something.

**Korra:** _(alarmingly)_ Claire, don't move, you're still attached to Kong!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** But it was too late as with one big tug, Claire toppled Kong back onto the ground with a loud crash. Kong has been up righted again now and nowadays he still looks down on the two little diesel engines. Ever since that stormy night though, and now that trains have started to run on time again, he never calls them bugs or mites because he knows that they may bite back.

**And that's episode 94/episode 21 of T&FMLA Series 4 done! Hope you enjoyed my parody of TTTE episode **_**'Cranky Bugs'**_**. Please review, I request criticism and I apologise of it's a bit short. And on that bombshell, it's time to end, thanks very much for reading, goodnight!**


	22. King Bure

**Tonight - Galatea teases a friend of hers, Sovereign gets a fright and King Edward II tries out a new fashion for masks.**

_**Tornado and Friends Mainline Adventures**_

Hello readers of this not very good and not so popular fanfic series, this' Olton Hall, aka Hogwarts Castle here and I for one don't believe in a certain Jack Frost, or King Bure as he's also known by apparently, well according to Galatea anyway. However, my friend King Edward II was convinced about him on one winters evening when he and Sovereign had to deliver coal to all the stations. Jack Frost isn't scary people, in fact he doesn't even exist! Thank goodness King Edward II found this out in the end as you shall now discover as I now narrate what turned out to be our version of TTTE episode _'Jack Frost'_. Enjoy!

**This episode stars:**

**GWR King no.6023 **_**'King Edward II'**_** and his driver**

**LMS Black 5 no.44871 **_**'Sovereign'**_

**LMS Jubilee no.45699 **_**'Galatea'**_

**SR N15 King Arthur no.(30)777 **_**'Sir Lamiel'**_

**Eliza the Vintage Steam Lorry**

**The Fat Director**

**A Stationmaster**

Episode 95: King Bure

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** It was an icy day in Great Britain. The engines were working very hard in the chilly conditions. They didn't seem to mind the freezing temperatures though because knew that they had toasting hot fireboxes to keep them warm. I wish I had one of those right now, why must I wait at least two fucking years to be steamed up again?!…Anyway, one evening, the Fat Director was telling some of the engines some important news.

**The Fat Director:** There's a big freeze coming tonight so King Edward II and Sovereign are to deliver extra coal to the stations.

**King Edward II and Sovereign:** _(eagerly)_ Yes sir!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** The Fat Director then walked away. Galatea spotted a chance to tease King Edward II.

**Galatea:** _(teasingly)_ You'd better hurry you two or scary Jack Frost might get you.

**King Edward II:** _(nervously)_ Who's Jack Frost?

**Sovereign:** _(sniffs)_ Don't be silly, Jack Frost isn't scary!

**Galatea:** _(teasingly)_ Oh yes he is. He's also known as King Bure you know and he's all white with a big spiky face.

**Sovereign:** _(angrily)_ What a load of bullshit Galatea! Whatever you call him, he's not scary so would you kindly shut the freaking hell up!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Sovereign knew that Jack Frost wasn't scary but poor King Edward II wasn't so sure.

**Sir Lamiel:** Don't let Galatea's teasing get to you Eddie, Jack Frost doesn't even exist.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** King Edward II thanked Sir Lamiel for his kind and assuring words but he was still feeling rather worried. That night, King Edward II shivered as he made his coal deliveries.

**King Edward II:** Jack Frost isn't scary, Jack Frost isn't scary, Jack Frost isn't scary!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** He would constantly remind himself this through his journey. Meanwhile, Sovereign was puffing along her route.

**Sovereign:** _(in thought)_ Silly King Edward II, all steamed up over about Jack Frost.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Back with King Edward II and he had just made the last of his deliveries. The stationmaster was very pleased to see him.

**Stationmaster:** Oh King Edward II, we're going to need twice as much coal to last through this freeze.

**King Edward II:** _(assuring)_ Don't worry Mr Stationmaster, this' my last stop so you can have my coal of you like.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** King Edward II was parked into the station siding and then his driver and fireman emptied his tender of its coal. The coal was then given to the stationmaster who found it very useful indeed for keeping warm. King Edward II though was now going to only be left with a lit lantern for company as his driver placed it on the ground in front of him.

**King Edward II:** _(worryingly)_ Do you think scary Jack Frost will find me?

**King Edward II's Driver:** _(chuckles)_ Jack Frost's not scary. And don't worry, Eliza will bring you some more coal in the morning.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** And then the driver and fireman went home to bed. Late at night, the icy wind howled and it started to snow. The snow was beginning to gather around King Edward II. In fact, he was so cold that icicles began to appear and hang from his cab edge, boiler and funnel. One icicle was even found hanging from his nose.

**King Edward II:** _(stutters)_ Oh b-b-bother!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** That didn't sound like King Edward II though and sure enough, it was so cold that he could hardly make any sounds at all. Back with Sovereign now and she had at last finished making her deliveries and was now on her way home. In the fog, she looked around her and she could see all kinds of dark, strange and scary shapes.

**Sovereign:** _(whispers nervously)_ Scary Jack Frost or King Bure or whatever his name is, pah!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Sovereign whistled as she approached the station where a frozen King Edward II was at. She puffed through the station and when she looked over to the siding, she gasped.

**King Edward II:** _(mutters nicely)_ H-Hello S-S-Sovereign.

**Sovereign:** _(cries)_ Scary King Bure!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** And then Sovereign raced away as fast as her wheels could carry her and she didn't stop until she was at someplace where she could hide. The next morning finally came and Eliza arrived carrying plenty of coal. She was surprised when she saw the state of poor King Edward II.

**Eliza:** _(chuffs)_ Oh my dear, it really does look like Jack Frost got you then.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Using the brought coal, the firelighter started King Edward II's fire. Soon his ice mask melted away.

**King Edward II:** _(toots happily)_ So scary Jack Frost is only frost!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** King Edward II was happy that he was feeling as warm as toast again. Later, he found Sovereign bragging to some of the other engines about what had happened last night.

**Sovereign:** _(huffs)_ I saw scary Jack Frost last night guys, or King Bure as you claim he's also known as Galatea. He even knows my name.

**King Edward II:** _(teasingly)_ Well this King also knows that you ran away. So I guess you might say I was two Kings in one night.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** And all the engines laughed and whistled including Sovereign, but King Edward II's was the loudest whistle of all.

**And that's episode 95/episode 22 of T&FMLA Series 4 done! Hope you enjoyed my parody of TTTE episode **_**'Jack Frost'**_**. Please review, I request criticism and I apologise if it's a bit short. And on that bombshell, it's time to end, thanks very much for reading, goodnight!**


	23. Reliable Guardsman

**Tonight - a train gets stuck on an incline, we re-enact more Dangerous Brothers and Rood Ashton Hall has a plan.**

_**Tornado and Friends Mainline Adventures**_

Hello readers of this' not very good and not so popular fanfic series, this' Olton Hall, aka Hogwarts Castle here and you know something, it wasn't just the classic Thomas episodes we re-enacted, unbeknownst to us of course, but we also had our fair share of re-enactments of today's T&F episodes. Today's episode's a prime example. You see, Royal Scot always seemed to treat his younger brother Scots Guardsman as though he actually was his guard…rather sad when you think about it. Thank goodness Scots Guardsman managed to convince his brother to stop it and treat him like he treats every other engine. Find out how he did so now as I narrate what turned out to be our version of T&F episode _'Old Reliable Edward'_. Enjoy!

**This episode stars:**

**LMS Royal Scot no.46115 **_**'Scots Guardsman'**_

**LMS Royal Scot no.46100 **_**'Royal Scot'**_

**GWR Hall no.4965 **_**'Rood Ashton Hall'**_

**LMS Princess Coronation no.46233 **_**'Duchess of Sutherland'**_

**GWR King no.6024 **_**'King Edward I'**_

**GWR Castle no.5043 **_**'Earl of Mount Edgcumbe'**_

**BR Standard Class 8 no.71000 **_**'Duke of Gloucester'**_

**A Stationmaster**

Episode 96: Reliable Guardsman

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** My friend Scots Guardsman's one of the friendliest engines on the mainline. Everyone respects Scots Guardsman and Scots Guardsman respects everyone…well, his older brother Royal Scot always seemed to treat him as though he was his actual guard.

**Royal Scot:** Alright Guard, I expect you to be there when I need you!

**Scots Guardsman:** _(sighs in annoyance)_ Why can't you just do things yourself, I mean you're older than me for god sake?!

**Royal Scot:** That's not the way it works in this family you know! Now, I expect you to be there when I need you ok?!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Scots Guardsman was getting really sick of this. 'Why can't Royal Scot just treat me like he treats every other engine, the total bastard of a brother?!' was what he was asking himself. That afternoon, Royal Scot was hauling a heavy passenger train up the fearsome Lickey Incline when he thought he saw a red flag beside the track.

**Royal Scot:** Oh no, that's a red danger signal, I'd better stop.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Royal Scot applied his brakes and stopped close to the red danger signal. However, it was at this point that he realised something.

**Royal Scot:** Wait a minute, that's not a danger signal, those are red ooh…

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** It was a pair of red trousers that had been blown off a washing line. Royal Scot blew the trousers off of his mouth and was feeling foolish. Then there was trouble. Royal Scot tried to carry on his journey but he just found himself rocking backward and forward as he couldn't get the train started again on the Incline with his long and heavy express coaches.

**Royal Scot:** Oh fuck.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Further down the line, Scots Guardsman had just arrived at Bromsgrove station when the stationmaster flagged him down.

**Stationmaster:** Scots Guardsman, your brother Royal Scot's stuck on the Lickey Incline so you'd better go and give him a push.

**Scots Guardsman:** _(sighs)_ Will do sir. _(whistles away)_ I don't know why it always has to be ME helping him, he's just getting what he wants and often when he gets it, he complains about me being too late or too slow to help him!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Back on the Lickey Incline, Royal Scot was still waiting very impatiently to be given a push. Just then, Duchess of Sutherland puffed past.

**Duchess of Sutherland:** _(teasingly)_ Having a rest are you Royal Scot? Oh just wait 'til I tell my boyfriend about this.

**Royal Scot:** I wish my personal guard would get here and give me a push before any other engines see me.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** A few minutes later…

**Rood Ashton Hall:** _(laughs)_ Oh dear Royal Scot, I see you got stuck on the Incline again.

**Royal Scot:** It wasn't my fault Rood Ashton Hall, there were some red trousers by the track and they looked like a danger signal.

**Rood Ashton Hall:** Red trousers, danger signal?!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** My brother burst out laughing at Royal Scot's excuse which left Royal Scot looking very cross. Just then, they heard a whistle from behind Royal Scot. It was Scots Guardsman, he'd finally arrived on the scene.

**Royal Scot:** _(crossly)_ You took your time my personal guard! I always told you that you're supposed to be there for me when I need you! I never expected you to be this slow and unreliable so I don't know why I bother sometimes!

**Rood Ashton Hall:** _(teasingly)_ You're not moving very fast yourself Royal Scot.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** As my brother puffed away, Scots Guardsman buffered up to the back of Royal Scot's train. Then, with all his might and with Royal Scot still fuming, he pushed his older brother up the Incline. When they reached the top, Royal Scot whistled loudly.

**Royal Scot:** _(whistles)_ Express coming through!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** He then rocketed away, leaving Scots Guardsman at the top of the Incline.

**Scots Guardsman:** Aren't you even going to say thank you?! Oh.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Later on, Scots Guardsman met up with Rood Ashton Hall in the yards.

**Scots Guardsman:** Oh Rood Ashton Hall, I really don't know why my older brother's so ungrateful. He never says thank you to me when I have to help him out of certain situations.

**Rood Ashton Hall:** _(grinning)_ Maybe it's time we taught your older brother a lesson.

**Scots Guardsman:** By the way, aren't you supposed to be re-enacting Rik and Ade alongside Earl of Mount Edgcumbe?

**Rood Ashton Hall:** I still haven't forgiven him for forcing me to go through that brick wall in the Dangerous Brothers Big Stunt sketch, so I gave it up. I think King Edward I has taken my place and all I can say's best of luck to him. I wonder what sort of sketch they're re-enacting at the moment.

_**(meanwhile)**_

**King Edward I:** _(looks around)_ He's not here.

_A few seconds later, Earl of Mount Edgcumbe steams up alongside._

**Earl of Mount Edgcumbe:** Good evening ladies and gentlemen, we're the Dangerous Engines!

**King Edward I:** Aha, Dangerous Engines!

**Earl of Mount Edgcumbe:** My name's Earl Dangerous and this' my other brother King Edward Dangerous! I'm usually dangerous, I trust you'll agree! And for my first trick, I…where's your explosives?!

**King Edward I:** Behind us in the shed.

**Earl of Mount Edgcumbe:** Well go and get them attached!

**King Edward I:** Aha, I shall now go and put on my explosives!

_King Edward I reverses into the shed to get the explosives attached._

**Earl of Mount Edgcumbe:** And tonight ladies and gentlemen, you, my own public, I would like to attempt a very dangerous stunt because I'm going to become the very first prime minister of the steam engines!

_King Edward I emerges from the shed with the explosives attached to his boiler._

**King Edward I:** Aha, my explosives!

**Earl of Mount Edgcumbe:** Well take them off!

**King Edward I:** What do you mean, what about the locomotive bomb impression?

**Earl of Mount Edgcumbe:** Its been cancelled.

**King Edward I:** But why didn't you tell me before?!

**Earl of Mount Edgcumbe:** Because I'm a total bastard!

_**(back to the plot)**_

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Alright that's enough of that! Why, I mean…just why? Oh lets just get on with the plot…what there is of it…ooh in fact this' it coming up now…about bloody time…see if you can spot it. That night, Rood Ashton Hall, Duchess of Sutherland and Scots Guardsman were telling some of the other engines about Royal Scot's dilemma on the Lickey Incline.

**Duchess of Sutherland:** And do you want to know what it was that he mistook for a danger signal?

**Rood Ashton Hall:** A pair of red trousers!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** All the engines laughed, except Royal Scot of course who was cross.

**Duke of Gloucester:** _(to Duchess of Sutherland)_ Oh thanks for telling me about this babe, this' just brilliant!

**Scots Guardsman:** _(teasingly)_ My brother claims to be fast and even reliable but he still needed my help to get up the Incline.

**Royal Scot:** And what I'm really complaining about is the fact that you took too long to get to me! What the bloody hell's keeping you, it's not far to get to the Lickey Incline from Bromsgrove station?! Besides, I can still be more reliable than you and also faster because I'm more important than you!

**Rood Ashton Hall:** Is that so? Well, I'd like to see you go faster than me.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** All the other engines gasped.

**Royal Scot:** _(laughs)_ Hahaha, go faster than you?! Oh don't be silly Rood Ashton Hall, that's too easy!

**Rood Ashton Hall:** Very well, you try and follow me tomorrow morning.

**Royal Scot:** No problem at all. In fact, I'll give you a ten second head start.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** All the other engines thought my brother was being very silly if he thought he could go faster than Royal Scot. My brother though just winked at Scots Guardsman who smiled in return, this was all part of the plan. The next morning, Royal Scot and Rood Ashton Hall met up as agreed.

**Rood Ashton Hall:** Ready Royal Scot?

**Royal Scot:** You'd better get a move on Rood Ashton Hall, I did promise you a ten second head start remember?

**Rood Ashton Hall:** _(chuckles)_ I remember.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** The guard then blew his whistle and Rood Ashton Hall puffed away with his passenger train which was of course smaller than the one Royal Scot was going to be hauling.

**Rood Ashton Hall:** I know exactly what to do so everything's under control, hahaha.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** As my brother puffed along, he knew that Royal Scot was coming up behind him and will catch up to him soon. Just then, he heard a whistle. It was Royal Scot and he was approaching fast. It was time to put the next phase of the plan into action. The signalman in the signal box up ahead had forgotten to switch the points so Rood Ashton Hall changed tracks and was now on Royal Scot's track; all part of the plan.

**Royal Scot:** Move back onto the other track Rood Ashton Hall, express coming through!

**Rood Ashton Hall:** Oh no, that's not what we agreed Royal Scot. You said you'd FOLLOW me across the mainline.

**Royal Scot:** Follow you?! But, but…oh, do you think you could go any faster?

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** My brother could go faster…but he didn't as they steamed through Bromsgrove station. And when they reached the Lickey Incline, Rood Ashton Hall started to go even slower.

**Royal Scot:** _(alarmingly)_ Speed up Rood Ashton Hall, speed up! I don't want to get stuck again!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** My brother however didn't speed up as he went slower and slower until eventually…

**Royal Scot:** _(moans)_ Noooo, I'm stuck again!

**Rood Ashton Hall:** _(laughs)_ It looks like I'm going faster than you after all!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** My brother continued to laugh as he puffed over the Incline. Royal Scot was left behind and alone. He wasn't alone for long though because just then Scots Guardsman puffed alongside him.

**Scots Guardsman:** Hello brother, have you given up following Rood Ashton Hall already?

**Royal Scot:** Rood Ashton Hall tricked me my personal guard, he went too slow!

**Scots Guardsman:** Oh dear. But I must say, you don't seem very 'reliable', always getting stuck on the Lickey Incline.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Scots Guardsman then began to puff away.

**Royal Scot:** Hey, where're you going, you're my personal guard and you're supposed to be there when I need you, so give me a push will you?!

**Scots Guardsman:** Oh, but I thought you wouldn't need any help from me. After all, I'm so slow and unreliable.

**Royal Scot:** _(cries)_ But I do need your help! I promise not to call you slow and unreliable anymore! And I also won't treat you like my actual guard again…please?!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** There was no response from Scots Guardsman as he carried on his way. Royal Scot felt very miserable. _(PEEP-PEEP!)_ Royal Scot gasped as he heard a familiar whistle. Then, reversing carefully back over the Incline was Scots Guardsman.

**Scots Guardsman:** _(as he reverses past)_ Alright then brother, I think you've learnt your lesson now.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Scots Guardsman buffered up to the back of the train and began to push it and his brother up the Incline.

**Scots Guardsman:** And what do you say?

**Royal Scot:** Oh the indignity.

**Scots Guardsman:** Sorry?

**Royal Scot:** I mean, thank you brother, thank you.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** They reached the top if the Incline where Royal Scot whistled and rocketed away from a smiling Scots Guardsman who was looking on from the top of the Incline.

**Scots Guardsman:** _(smiling)_ You're welcome brother, anytime.

**And that's episode 96/episode 23 of T&FMLA Series 4 done! Hope you enjoyed my parody of T&F episode **_**'Old Reliable Edward'**_**. Please review and I request criticism. And on that bombshell, it's time to end, thanks very much for reading, goodnight!**


	24. Birthday Celebration

**Tonight - Tornado changes colour, Fatso has a new suit and the engine from a Land Rover goes bang.**

_**Tornado and Friends Mainline Adventures**_

Hello readers of this not very good and not so popular fanfic series, this' Olton Hall, aka Hogwarts Castle here and for today's episode, we're focussing on Fatso again. It was his wife's birthday and Fatso had a new suit for the occasion. However, on his journey to the birthday party, he constantly ran into bad luck which culminated into…well find out now as I narrate what turned out to be our version of TTTE episode _'Lady Hatt's Birthday Party'_. Enjoy!

**This episode stars:**

**LNER Peppercorn A1 no.60163 **_**'Tornado'**_** and her driver**

**LNER A4 no.60009 **_**'Union of South Africa'**_

**Roberto the Bus**

**Defender the Land Rover**

**Joe the Steamroller and his driver**

**The Fat Director and his wife**

**A Stationmaster**

Episode 97: Birthday Celebration

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** One bright and sunny summers morning, Union of South Africa was taking on more water when Tornado puffed up alongside her.

**Tornado:** Hello Union of South Africa, notice anything different about me?

**Union of South Africa:** Yes Tornado, it's 11:30 in the morning and you're moving about. Did the shed you were sleeping in last night catch fire or something?

**Tornado:** No, no, look at my new paintwork.

**Union of South Africa:** Oh so you've given up the express blue then?

**Tornado:** It was time for me to return to my old apple green livery and I must admit, as much as I'm happy to be back with my old apple green coat, I'm gonna miss the express blue coat.

**Union of South Africa:** Well welcome back to the green coloured engines on the mainline group Tornado.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Just then, Roberto the bus revved up on the road next to the girls.

**Roberto:** Hello ladies, have you two noticed something?

**Tornado:** What sort of something Roberto?

**Roberto:** The Fat Director, he seems different.

**Union of South Africa:** Well I did see him staring up at the clouds earlier this morning. I wonder why?

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Well Union of South Africa, and audience, the reason was actually rather simple. You see, it was Mrs Walkers birthday and Mr George had a new outfit.

**Mrs Walkers:** It's perfect for my birthday party. You'll look splendid George dear.

**The Fat Director:** And I'll wear my finest outfit just for you. Your birthday's a great occasion.

**Mrs Walkers:** It is indeed so don't be late okay?

**The Fat Director:** Don't worry my dear, I shall be spic and span and right on time.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Later that day, the Fat Director had changed into his new suit and was showing it off to the stationmaster.

**Stationmaster:** You look fine sir. Now, you'd best be going.

**The Fat Director:** Yes indeed I'd better and since the engines are busy I'll take the car.

**Stationmaster:** is it reliable?

**The Fat Director:** Certainly.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** However, the Fat Director was about to be proven wrong. He got into his car, started it up and drove off en route for the station where the party was being held, he knew his wife would be waiting for him. He honked the car horn to the engines he passed and they'd politely whistle back to him. He soon arrived at some open road and it was here where the troubles began. As he sped along, he suddenly saw a large pothole in the road. He braked hard but it was too late. The car dipped into the pothole and then the sound of escaping air could be heard. The Fat Director looked out the window and could see the problem once he looked back and down.

**The Fat Director:** Bollocks, now I've got a puncture! _(gets out of car to get a closer look at the puncture)_ If I change my wheel, I'm sure to dirty my suit and that would never do!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Just then, he heard a horn from behind him. He looked back and saw Defender the Land Rover approaching. He stopped alongside the Fat Director who explained the situation to him.

**The Fat Director:** I have to attend my wife's birthday party and I simply cannot be late so please give me a lift.

**Defender:** I'll try sir.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Satisfied, the Fat Director hopped into Defender who then drove off. However, Defender didn't like going fast and this was proven a few miles down the road.

**Defender:** I'm hot and my engine will overheat!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** And it did indeed and steam began to emerge from the radiator. Defender pulled over to the side of the road.

**Defender:** _(sadly)_ Told you so.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** The Fat Director got out of Defender and he wasn't happy.

**The Fat Director:** _(groans)_ Bollocks, bollocks!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Just then, a whistle was heard from behind them. It was Joe the Steamroller, and I must admit I'm glad to see that he's not causing any problems for my friends on the North Yorkshire Moors Railway. Joe was cross when he saw Defender.

**Joe:** _(crossly)_ Call yourself a car, you're a disgrace to the road! Find yourself a scrap yard!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Defender spluttered in fury. The Fat Director went to speak with Joe's driver who was more polite.

**Joe's Driver:** Can I be of assistance sir?

**The Fat Director:** _(sighs)_ Only if you can get me to my wife's birthday party.

**Joe's Driver:** We can take you to Tornado, she's just down the line.

**The Fat Director:** Much obliged.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** With the Fat Director onboard, Joe rumbled away.

**Defender:** _(wails)_ What about me?!

**The Fat Director:** _(calls)_ I'll send for help so stay there!

**Defender:** _(cries)_ That's all I can do!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Joe was enjoying rolling the road. However, the Fat Director wasn't having such a good time as oil splashed everywhere which included his new suit. Worse was to follow when they could all hear a strange but not good sounding noise.

**Joe:** _(cries)_ Help, something's snapped!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** He veered out of control which eventually culminated in the Fat Director falling out of him and landing in a muddy ditch close to where Tornado was taking on water.

**The Fat Director:** _(groans)_ Bollocks, bollocks!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** The Fat Director managed to make his way out of the muddy ditch and walk over to Tornado, who'd never seen her boss in such a mess before.

**Tornado:** Geez, what've you been up to sir?

**The Fat Director:** Don't ask Tornado, just don't ask!

**Tornado's Driver:** Can we help you sir?

**The Fat Director:** Yes please, get me to the station as fast as you can.

**Tornado's Driver:** I'm afraid our fireman has been taken ill.

**The Fat Director:** _(sighs but smiles)_ Then I'll be your fireman.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Tornado spun her eyes with excitement, she was really looking forward to having her boss acting as her fireman. With the Fat Director inside the cab, Tornado steamed off. As she puffed along, the Fat Director had to work hard stoking her fire. Coal dust and smut was going absolutely everywhere but the Fat Director didn't care about his ruined new suit anymore, he just got on with his fireman job. At last, they reached the station where the party was being held. The Fat Director peered out of the cab and looked at the station clock.

**The Fat Director:** _(gasps)_ Just in time.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** He hurriedly got out of the cab and picked up a huge bunch of flowers. He then headed towards the party.

**Tornado:** _(calls)_ Best of luck sir!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** At the party, the Fat Director's wife was waiting for him. As the clock struck 3, the doors opened and there stood Mr George Walkers, tired but triumphant. He gave his wife the flowers.

**Mrs Walkers:** Well thank you my dear. I knew this was a special birthday party but I didn't know it was fancy dress.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Everybody laughed and then the party truly began, so I think it's probably best that we leave them to it.

**And that's episode 97/episode 24 of T&FMLA Series 4 done! Hope you enjoyed my parody of TTTE episode **_**'Lady Hatt's Birthday Party'**_**. Please review, I request criticism and I apologise if it's a bit short. And on that bombshell, it's time to end, thanks very much for reading, goodnight!**


	25. Loose-Fitting Tornado

**Tonight - Leander's feeling impatient, we find that the story's set in a flashback and Tornado's knocking on deaths door.**

_**Tornado and Friends Mainline Adventures**_

Hello readers of this not very good and not so popular fanfic series, this' Olton Hall, aka Hogwarts Castle here and…what, did you expect the series to be over after 24 episodes? Well, as this' the final series, it'll go as far as it can go. Besides, I remember the story when Tornado was sent to work on a passenger special up in Scotland alongside Sherwood Forester. Things took a turn for the worse though when they arrived at the famous horseshoe curve. What happened exactly? Well find out now as I narrate what turned out to be our version of TTTE episode _'Bulldog'_. Enjoy!

**This episode stars:**

**LNER Peppercorn A1 no.60163 **_**'Tornado'**_

**LMS Black 5 no.45231 **_**'Sherwood Forester'**_** and her fireman**

**LMS Jubilee no.45690 **_**'Leander'**_

**LNER A4 no.60007 **_**'Sir Nigel Gresley'**_

**LNER K1 no.62005 **_**'Lord of the Isles'**_

**BR Standard Class 7 Britannia no.70013 **_**'Oliver Cromwell'**_

**GWR 3700 Class no.3440 **_**'City of Truro'**_

**BR Standard Class 4 4-6-0 no.75029 **_**'The Green Knight'**_

**A Manager**

**Some Passengers**

Episode 98: Loose-Fitting Tornado

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** One morning Leander was impatient. She was wearing a new coat of paint and longed for everyone to see it. The engines around her though were still dozing but not Leander.

**Leander:** _(impatiently)_ Driver should be here by now, what's he doing?

**Sir Nigel Gresley:** _(grunts)_ Sleeping.

**Leander:** But that means I'll be late! The coaches will be waiting and the passengers will get cross!

**Lord of the Isles:** _(huffs)_ Rubbish!

**Oliver Cromwell:** It's still early, you just want to show off.

**Leander:** No I don't!

**City of Truro:** Never mind Leander, it'll soon be time for work. But you'd better be careful because otherwise you might run into danger. Tornado ran into just such a thing a while back, in fact it happened back when she was painted in BR express blue.

**The Green Knight:** Oh I think I know the story you're going on about City of Truro.

**City of Truro:** Yep, it's that story. Olton Hall, since you're the narrator, would you mind telling the story for us?

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** I thought you'd never ask City of Truro.

_**(flashback)**_

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** As you readers know from the previous episode, Tornado has now been repainted back into apple green. But this story took place back when she was still painted express blue. You see, she'd been working hard lately and the manager was very pleased with her. One summers day, he came to see her.

**Manager:** Tornado, I've been very pleased with your work lately. Therefore, after making arrangements with the Fat Director, its been decided that for tomorrow, you're going to work on a passenger special up in Scotland that runs along the famous 'Horseshoe Curve'.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Tornado was very excited, she'd never been round the horseshoe curve before.

**Tornado:** _(excitedly)_ Yes please sir.

**Manager:** Then tomorrow, once you've been given a new coat of express blue paint, you'll be working with Sherwood Forester on the special.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Tornado's excitement instantly went away.

**Tornado:** _(huffily)_ Huh, Sherwood Forester's an old fusspot.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** The next day came and Tornado was raring to go, but Sherwood Forester had to tell her something urgent.

**Sherwood Forester:** _(warningly)_ Listen young Tornado, the line around the horseshoe curve's difficult so I'll lead.

**Tornado:** What, no way, I'll lead! Besides, how can I admire what'll surely be a beautiful view if you're in front of me blocking the scenery?!

**Sherwood Forester:** Suit yourself. But never mind the view, look at the track.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Once the coaches were ready and the engines were coupled up to them, they set off. Later, as they approached the horseshoe curve, Tornado was already admiring the greenery that was around them, but Sherwood Forester felt she had to remind the young engine about something.

**Sherwood Forester:** _(warningly)_ Look at the track, never mind the view!

**Tornado:** Fusspot, fusspot! Fuddy-duddy, fuddy-duddy, fuddy-duddy!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** As the journey went on, Tornado found that their speed was getting slower and slower.

**Tornado:** _(urges)_ Don't dawdle, don't dawdle!

**Sherwood Forester:** _(puffs)_ No hurry, no hurry.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Soon, they rounded a bend and there it was…the famous horseshoe curve. Tornado gasped in amazement, the scenery before her very eyes, combined with the summer sun, was absolutely stunning.

**Tornado:** _(gasps)_ Wow…it's beautiful…absolutely breathtaking.

**Sherwood Forester:** I'm glad you're loving the scenery Tornado but remember what I said about the track.

**Tornado:** Geez thanks for ruining the moment blackie!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** One moment, everything was seemingly safe when suddenly…Tornado found herself derailed.

**Tornado:** _(in horror)_ Holy shit!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Tornado was now teetering over the edge of the track. She was knocking on deaths door now because any wrong movement could send her rolling down the mountain the horseshoe curve was on and towards destruction. Sherwood Forester was bravely holding onto Tornado with all her strength.

**Sherwood Forester:** _(calls)_ Stop shaking Tornado because I can't hold you if you shake!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Sherwood Forester's driver and fireman worked quickly to make the two engines safe again. Then however, came more trouble as the fireman checked Sherwood Forester's tanks.

**Sherwood Forester's Fireman:** _(cries)_ Water, Sherwood Forester needs water quickly!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** As it was a hot summers day, almost all of the passengers had bottles which were filled to the brim with water and they decided to sacrifice some of it for Sherwood Forester. The buffet car on the passenger train though had to relinquish the most water and the cool liquid was passed from passenger to passenger in bottles and buckets over to Sherwood Forester's fireman who then poured it into his engines tanks. The more water she received, Sherwood Forester's thirst was quenching and she was gaining more and more strength. Al last, with the help of everyone, Sherwood Forester was able to pull Tornado back onto the rails. When they were ready, they started off once more. The manager was waiting for them at the final station. He apologised for the accident but the passengers were thinking otherwise.

**Passengers:** That Sherwood Forester is a hero! She stood firm like a bulldog and just wouldn't let go!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Tornado was grateful to.

**Tornado:** Thank you for rescuing me Sherwood Forester, I don't know why you bothered after I had been so rude.

**Sherwood Forester:** Oh well. You just had a new coat of paint so it would've been a pity if you rolled down the mountain and spoiled it.

**And that's episode 98/episode 25 of T&FMLA done! Hope you enjoyed my parody of TTTE episode **_**'Bulldog'**_**. Please review, I request criticism and I apologise if it's a bit short. And on that bombshell, it's time to end, thanks very much for reading, goodnight!**


	26. As I Said Pocket Rocket

**Tonight - Pocket Rocket feels a bump, Lord Nelson's not prepared to listen and Tangmere gets buried alive.**

_**Tornado and Friends Mainline Adventures**_

Hello readers of this not very good and not so popular fanfic series, this' Olton Hall, aka Hogwarts Castle here and there was a time when, for some unknown reason, most of the engines seem to not listen to anything my friend Pocket Rocket had to tell them, even if it was important. Even the Fat Director wasn't listening to her. I'm just happy though that they finally decided to listen to her when she rescued Tangmere from an accident. Find out how it all unfolded now as I narrate when turned out to be our version of TTTE episode _'Percy Gets It Right'_. Enjoy…oh and by the way, I feature in this as this occurred when I was still in steam…and I was still being the bitchy engine that I was!

**This episode stars:**

**BR Standard Class 4 2-6-0 no.76079 **_**'Pocket Rocket'**_** and her driver**

**SR Battle of Britain no.34067 **_**'Tangmere'**_

**SR LN no.(30)850 **_**'Lord Nelson'**_

**GWR Hall no.5972 **_**'Olton Hall'**_** (Hogwarts Castle)**

**GWR Castle no.5029 **_**'Nunney Castle'**_

**SR West Country no.34046 **_**'Braunton'**_

**LMS Black 5 no.45428 **_**'Eric Treacy'**_

**The Fat Director**

**A Prize Bull**

**SR West Country no.34027 **_**'Taw Valley'**__**(mentioned)**_

Episode 99: As I Said Pocket Rocket

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** At harvest time, the air's filled with the smell of fruit and vegetables. The goods engines happily deliver them to market whether it's in England or north of the border in Scotland. However, one day in Scotland, mist and rain was sweeping around north of the border. That wasn't stopping Pocket Rocket though as she was delivering trucks filled with fresh tomatoes. She was just going round the famous horseshoe curve when she suddenly felt a big bump.

BUMP!

**Pocket Rocket:** _(cries)_ Bust my buffers, what was that?!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Her driver stopped the train and then went to inspect the tracks while the guard put up a warning sign.

**Pocket Rocket's Driver:** The earth's crumbling!

**Pocket Rocket:** We must tell the Fat Director!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** The driver agreed as he hopped back into the cab and then started the train off again. Pocket Rocket delivered the tomatoes and then returned to the yards where Lord Nelson had just finished having his tanks filled with water.

**Pocket Rocket:** I've got some important news Lord Nelson, the tracks on the horseshoe curve are wobbly!

**Lord Nelson:** _(huffs)_ Huh! Do you honestly expect me to believe stupid and retarded you Pocket Rocket?! That's not news, now I cannot stand for your silly chatter!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Lord Nelson then steamed away huffily.

**Pocket Rocket:** _(mutters)_ Lord Nelson never listens to me. Well he's a total git anyway.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Meanwhile from further down the yard behind Pocket Rocket, I was arguing with Nunney Castle.

**Olton Hall:** _(angrily)_ Why am I still having to pull goods trains Nunney Castle?! I mean, I've got a reputation to keep up, I'm Hogwarts Castle for god bloody sake! If anything, I should be treated just like you!

**Nunney Castle:** Treated more like me, what're you talking about?…Wait a minute, is this all about the railway enthusiasts joke, that you're a Hall who thinks she's a Castle?

**Olton Hall:** You're damn right it is! Why can't I been seen as Hogwarts Castle instead of Olton Hall?! Maybe that way, I can no longer get dirty goods trains and get passenger trains only!

**Nunney Castle:** Taw Valley was thinking the exact same thing when she was masquerading as Hogwarts Express.

**Olton Hall:** Taw Valley was too modern to be associated with Harry Potter! Besides, she looked ugly in MY red paint

**Braunton:** _(puffs in crossly)_ What was that you were saying about my sister Olton Hall?!

**Olton Hall:** Err…nothing.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Alright lets move on now shall we?! Next, Pocket Rocket decided to speak to the Fat Director. She found him talking to Tangmere.

**Pocket Rocket:** Sir, sir!

**The Fat Director:** Not now Pocket Rocket! Tangmere, you're to collect the prize bull. He's waiting on the other end of the horseshoe curve.

**Pocket Rocket:** _(cries)_ But the tracks on the curve are wobbly!

**The Fat Director:** They're safe enough!

**Tangmere:** _(whistles away)_ Bye Pocket Rocket.

**Pocket Rocket:** Why's nobody listening to me anymore?

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Later, Tangmere was chuffing carefully through the wind and rain. She soon came to the horseshoe curve. As she reached the end of the curve, nothing 'wobbly' had happened.

**Tangmere:** I don't know what Pocket Rocket was going on about.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Soon, the prize bull was onboard her cattle truck and she was on her way back. She clanked her way towards the horseshoe curve again. This time however, there was trouble. Not only did she feel even more wobbles than Pocket Rocket did because of the rain, but there had also been a landslide. Tangmere heard a deep rumbling sound and then saw the landslide ahead. Her driver applied the brakes…but, you guessed it, it was too late. Tangmere crashed into the landslide in another attempt to take her nickname of the 'Dirty Lady' to another new level.

**Tangmere:** _(cries)_ Holy crap, we're stuck!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** And they were. Late that night, Pocket Rocket had heard news that the prize bull still hadn't been delivered. She was worried as this could only mean one thing.

**Pocket Rocket:** Tangmere's in trouble.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Lord Nelson and Eric Treacy took no notice however.

**Lord Nelson:** _(huffs)_ Worry wheels!

**Eric Treacy:** Fussy funnel!

**Pocket Rocket:** _(to her driver)_ Please, can we go and find Tangmere?

**Pocket Rocket's Driver:** Right away!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** With her footplate crew in the cab, Pocket Rocket set off on her important mission. As Pocket Rocket approached the horseshoe curve, she was feeling rather nervous but her lamp shone brightly in the dark. The tracks creaked and wobbled but Pocket Rocket pressed on. She rounded a bend to officially be on the horseshoe curve and she then saw the landslide. As she approached it, she spotted Tangmere buried inside it. Tangmere was wondering when help was going to arrive so she was delighted when she saw Pocket Rocket coming towards her.

**Tangmere:** _(cries)_ Pocket Rocket!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** As you could probably guess, Tangmere was very happy to see her friend.

**Pocket Rocket:** I'll have you out of there in no time!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Pocket Rocket's fireman brought some rope out of the cab. He connected one end to Pocket Rocket and then the other end to Tangmere. With everything ready, Pocket Rocket began to pull. She puffed and pulled and pulled and puffed, her wheels were spinning furiously as Tangmere was slowly but surely being released from being buried alive. At long last, Pocket Rocket had Tangmere freed from the landslide.

**Tangmere:** Oh thank you Pocket Rocket, thank you so much!

**Pocket Rocket:** _(smiles)_ I'm just glad to be useful.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Both engines footplate crews then worked together to clear away the landslide so the cattle truck containing the prize bull could once again be coupled up to Tangmere. After a while, after much hard work, the track was clear of the landslide. Tangmere was once again coupled up to the cattle truck and Pocket Rocket was then coupled up to Tangmere. By the time this moment was happening though, it was already dawn. The two engines though, working together, delivered the prize bull safely. They found the Fat Director standing on the station platform.

**Pocket Rocket:** _(whistles)_ Tangmere's here!

**Tangmere:** Pocket Rocket saved the day!

**Prize Bull:** Moo!

**The Fat Director:** I'm sorry about yesterday Pocket Rocket. I guess we should do a better job of listening to you in future.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Pocket Rocket was so pleased that she spun her eyes in pure delight.

**And that's episode 99/episode 26 of T&FMLA Series 4 done! Hope you enjoyed my parody of TTTE episode **_**'Percy Gets It Right'**_**. Please review, I request criticism and I apologise if it's a bit short. And on that bombshell, it's time to end, thanks very much for reading, goodnight!**


	27. Alycidon and the Grumpy Passenger

**Tonight - we encounter a grumpy passenger, Alycidon collects some extra coaches and Western Champion's feeling cross.**

_**Tornado and Friends Mainline Adventures**_

Hello readers of this not very good and not so popular fanfic series, this' Olton Hall, aka Hogwarts Castle here and this' it folks, the episode where the series hits treble figures. Wow, 100 episodes and still going, and believe me, I've got no idea how. Even our writer how no idea on how the series has made it this far. But anyway, since we have made it this far, we might as well carry on as we did before we reached our century of episodes. So, for today's episode, it turned out that our diesel friends, unbeknownst to them of course, re-enacted one of today's Thomas episodes when Alycidon the Deltic encountered a passenger who was always finding ways to complain and be very, very annoying. How'd Alycidon deal with it? Well find out now as I narrate what turned out to be our version of T&F episode _'Duncan and the Grumpy Passenger'_. Enjoy!

**This episode stars:**

**Class 55 Deltic Diesel no.D9009 **_**'Alycidon'**_

**Class 52 Western Diesel no.D1015 **_**'Western Champion'**_

**Raymond the Class 60 Diesel**

**Kayla the Class 56 Grid Diesel**

**Tennille the Class 08 Shunting Diesel**

**The Fat Director**

**A Grumpy Passenger**

Episode 100: Alycidon and the Grumpy Passenger

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Alycidon the Deltic diesel pulls passengers. He takes people to work every morning and brings them home from work again every evening. However, as Alycidon picked up the passengers, there always seemed to be one certain passenger who was always grumbling. This passenger checked his pocket watch and even though the train was on time, he was still grumbling.

**Grumpy Passenger:** Huh, at last, oh dear!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** This really irritated Alycidon. As he waited for the guard to blow his whistle, Raymond turned up.

**Raymond:** How Alycidon, how're you?

**Alycidon:** _(irritated)_ How am I? I'll tell you how I am! I've got an awful wobbly wheel!

**Raymond:** Maybe you should go to the works.

**Alycidon:** _(angrily)_ I already did but guess what?! The workmen said there was nothing wrong with it! Just fucking typical! Have you seen the track further down the line?!

**Raymond:** No, why? What's happening to it?

**Alycidon:** Well don't ask that Fatso of a Director because he says, 'nothing'! But every time I go over that part of the mainline, my boiler shakes and my connecting rods rattle! And now look at my wobbly wheel!

**Raymond:** But…

**Alycidon:** And to top it all, I've got this one passenger who's always grumbling and complaining! He has even had the cheek to say I'm not doing my job properly!

**Raymond:** Well, you are running a bit late Alycidon.

**Alycidon:** Ohhhh, don't you start!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Just then, the guard blew his whistle and Alycidon honked his horn and whirred away. Alycidon was an engine who liked to complain himself but what he said about his passenger was true. Alycidon's grumpy passenger complained almost as much as Alycidon did. He complained if Alycidon was running late and he complained if the coaches weren't suitable enough. He complained when Alycidon was going too slow.

**Grumpy Passenger:** Come on, what's the hold up?!

**Alycidon:** There're some cows on the line, isn't that rather obvious with you ya moaning knobhead!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** And the grumpy passenger even complained when Alycidon was going too fast. When Alycidon dropped the grumpy passenger off at the next station, the passenger immediately complained to the guard about Alycidon going too fast which made him spill his cup of tea all over his woolly coat. Alycidon was now feeling very fed up as he watch the grumpy passenger walk angrily away. Just then, Kayla arrived.

**Kayla:** Hello Alycidon, everything alright?

**Alycidon:** No, I've got a very grumpy passenger Kayla! He's never happy, even though he has got nothing to complain about!

**Kayla:** _(chuckles)_ Oh really, is that true?

**Alycidon:** _(angrily)_ Humph! If it's not true now, I'll soon make sure it is!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** And Alycidon fumed away. He went off to the yard to pick up some more coaches. Tennille was also there.

**Tennille:** Hello Alycidon, what're you doing?

**Alycidon:** I'm picking up some extra coaches for tonight so there'll be plenty of room for everyone. _(honks his horn and sets off)_ None of my passengers will have any reason to complain!

**Tennille:** But Alycidon, Western Champion needs those coaches for his passengers!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** But Alycidon was too far away to hear Tennille. That evening, Alycidon made good time to pick up his regular passengers.

**Alycidon:** Hop onboard everyone, there's plenty of space for all of you!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Among the passengers to get on was the grumpy one and he wasn't happy as he read a local newspaper. When all the passengers were onboard, Alycidon hummed away. Just then, Western Champion arrived on the other platform without any coaches. He couldn't take any of his passengers anywhere.

**Western Champion:** _(crossly)_ I say, Alycidon, what're you doing with my coaches?! Come back here!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** All of Western Champion's passengers were now complaining to the guard about where the coaches were, and the guard had absolutely no idea, even though Alycidon just left with them so how did he not spot them the blithering idiot?! Anyway, as Alycidon sped along, he came across some workmen working busily on the line.

**Alycidon:** Oh no, warning flags! If I slow down, there's going to be complaints from that passenger.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** So Alycidon didn't slow down and the workmen were left looking very cross indeed. Alycidon though was feeling very pleased with himself as he arrived at the final station. He was happy and so were all his passengers…well, all except one and I think you know who I'm referring to. Alycidon was now feeling cross as he headed home. However, the following morning when Alycidon arrived to pick up his passengers, the grumpy passenger was no where to be seen on the platform. Raymond then arrived as he often did.

**Raymond:** Hello Alycidon, isn't it time you set off?

**Alycidon:** Yes, but one of my passengers is going to be very grumpy indeed if he misses his train.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Just then, gasping could be heard in the background behind Alycidon. It was the grumpy passenger running towards the train. He had slept through his alarm clock and was running late. So Alycidon waited on the platform even after the guard had blown his whistle so that the grumpy passenger could get onboard.

**Grumpy Passenger:** _(gasps thankfully)_ Oh, oh thank goodness.

**Alycidon:** Well, I can't say he has anything to complain about this morning.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Suddenly, he heard the other passengers complaining because all of them were now running late. The stationmaster was also cross with Alycidon, and they weren't the only ones because Alycidon then heard a horn from behind him.

**Western Champion:** _(crossly)_ Oh hurry up Alycidon, get out of the way! You've made me late to and my passengers aren't happy about it!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Alycidon decided to set off. Now everyone was complaining and the grumpy passenger was complaining most of all.

**Grumpy Passenger:** Ugh, ugh oh no, ugh no, no, no, call this mainline reliable? Huh, certainly not! Coaches are uncomfortable, trains are always late, oh dear oh dear oh dear!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Alycidon sighed on annoyance, why can't this passenger just shut the fuck up?! Alycidon was hastily speeding along the track trying to make up for lost time, when he came across the workmen once again.

**Alycidon:** I can't be late and I can't hear anymore complaints!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** So Alycidon ignored the workmen again but this time he was feeling rather bad about it.

**Alycidon:** _(sighs)_ I just can't seem to do anything right today.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** As Alycidon arrived at the last station of the journey, he spotted the Fat Director waiting for him on the platform.

**Alycidon:** _(sadly)_ Sir, I know what you're going to say and I'm, I'm, truly, sorry.

**The Fat Director:** Thank you for saying so Alycidon but why did you take Western Champion's coaches, speed through the rail works and ignore the guards whistle?

**Alycidon:** Because of that grumpy passenger sir, I was trying to stop him complaining.

**The Fat Director:** _(sees the grumpy passenger exit the train)_ Alycidon, I know that passenger well. He's always grumpy and he always finds something to complain about. Today however, you've made everyone grumpy!

**Alycidon:** _(miserably)_ Yes sir, I know sir.

**The Fat Director:** From now on, you must do your best to ignore that man and get on with doing your job properly!

**Alycidon:** Will do, thank you sir.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** That evening, Alycidon once again approached the workmen working on the line. This time though, he decided to slow right down. The workmen were happy and the passengers understood the decrease of speed when they saw what was going on…well, almost all of them.

**Grumpy Passenger:** Oh come on, hurry up, I'm going to be late for my tea!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Alycidon ignored him this time. He soon arrived back at the first station just as Raymond hummed in.

**Raymond:** Evening Alycidon, I must say it's rather surprising to see you smiling at the end of a busy day.

**Alycidon:** _(smiling)_ Well I've had a good day Raymond and today I've learnt a very important lesson. I'm going to change my ways and be a different diesel engine from now on, just you wait and see.

**Raymond:** Oh really? You mean, you're going to stop grumbling once and for all?

**Alycidon:** No, I mean I'm going to stop listening to that grumpy old passenger and just get on with being really useful.

**Raymond:** Good for you Alycidon, good for you.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Just then the guard blew his whistle and it was at this point where it all set off for Alycidon.

**Alycidon:** _(grumbles)_ Alright, alright, I'm going! _(whirrs away)_ Stupid grumbling indeed, it's not me who's always grumbling! Ouch, argh there goes my wobbly wheel again! Huh, I knew this was gonna happen! Why do people always think it's me who's always grumbling?! I mean, I've never grumbled in my life! Me, grumbling, don't think so!…

**And that's episode 100/episode 27 of T&FMLA Series 4 done! Hope you enjoyed my parody of T&F episode **_**'Duncan and the Grumpy Passenger'**_**. Please review and I request criticism. And on that bombshell, it's time to end, thanks very much for reading, goodnight!**


	28. The Secret of River

**Tonight - Korra and Claire are convinced that they don't need any help, a new character has a sing along and Tennille looks worried.**

_**Tornado and Friends Mainline Adventures**_

Hello readers of this not very good and not so popular fanfic series, this' Olton Hall, aka Hogwarts Castle here and I've got a diesel friend that I don't think you readers have me yet and that's our female equivalent to Salty. You're going to meet River in today's episode because River was sent to help out at the quarry where she was feeling homesick, especially since she always loved working at the docks. However, she did know that the quarry work was just as important as the workloads at the docks so she was happy to help Korra, Claire and Tennille. Find out how this episode panned out now as I narrate what turned out to be our version of TTTE episode _'Salty's Secret'_. Enjoy!

**This episode stars:**

**BR Class 07 Shunting Diesel no.07 007 (who we shall name River)**

**Korra the Class 11 Shunting Diesel**

**Claire the Class 12 Shunting Diesel**

**Tennille the Class 08 Shunting Diesel**

**The Fat Director**

**The Troublesome Trucks**

Episode 101: The Secret of River

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** All the engines on the Great British mainline love their work. Sometimes though there was too much work and that's when the Fat Director promotes heritage railway engines onto the mainline. River the Class 07 shunting diesel was one of these engines. Shunting workloads were on the increase once again so she really was needed. The Class 07's were often found working on docksides back in the day, so River loved to tell tales of the sea.

**River:** Wee-hee, until the old fritter finally caught a tide, ah, it's good to be useful!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** River was excited about helping out on the mainline. She hoped that she was going to do some jobs near the sea because she absolutely loved the sea. Before long, River arrived at her new job at the quarry. She spotted Korra and Claire in adjacent sidings.

**River:** Ahoy ladies, River pride of the seven seas here! I'm a new diesel on the mainline and I'm here to give you some help!

**Korra:** _(crossly)_ Help, help from a diesel smaller than us?!

**Claire:** _(angrily)_ Oh bitch please!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** As you can clearly tell, Korra and Claire didn't think they needed any help, especially from diesel that was smaller in size than them. Just then Tennille arrived and she was more friendly. But before speaking to River, she scolded Korra and Claire.

**Tennille:** _(angrily)_ Well her boiler may indeed be shorter but she's definitely longer than us so be quiet! _(proudly to River)_ Ah, you must be River, welcome to the quarry.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** River looked all around. Everywhere she looked, she saw nothing but rocks.

**River:** _(cries)_ A quarry?! There must be some mistake here because as a Class 07, I'm basically a dockside diesel!

**Tennille:** You're a quarry diesel now River.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Tennille then explained to River that they, along with Korra and Claire, had to complete an important job for the Fat Director. River was sad that she wouldn't be working by the sea but she knew what it meant to be a really useful engine so she set to work at once.

**River:** Ah well, at least there be trucks.

**Tennille:** You'd better mind them because they can be a bother.

**Korra:** _(smirks)_ She won't last five minutes.

**Claire:** _(grinning)_ Those trucks will trip her up soon enough.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** However, much to Korra and Claire's surprise, the trucks seemed to give Rover absolutely no trouble whatsoever. She carefully shunted them into position whether it be into sidings or under shoots. She even acted as a middle engine, meaning she pushed some trucks while some others were coupled up behind her. And all the while, she was singing a little song.

**River:** _(singing)_ And he yawns, yo-ho-ho and a bucket of prawns, the tiller spins…

**Trucks:** _(singing)_ And the captain yawns!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Thanks to River, the Fat Director's important job was almost done. Korra and Claire were surprised and they were also feeling a little jealous. That night, Korra, Claire and Tennille were resting in the quarry sheds when they spotted River approaching them.

**Claire:** _(grouches)_ Oh look, there she is, here comes Little Miss Show Off!

**Tennille:** Well you have to admit that she has got a knack with those trucks.

**Korra:** _(huffs)_ My driver says that she'll bore the bolts off of us with her stories.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** However, River she didn't say a single word. She didn't even come near the shed. Tennille could see that River was looking miserable and she was feeling rather worried. She rolled up alongside River and asked her what she was doing on her own.

**River:** _(sadly)_ Oh I thought I might catch a bit of sea breeze but then I remembered that sea breezes only occur in the daytime.

**Tennille:** _(worried)_ You really do miss the sea don't you?

**River:** _(miserably)_ Ay, I do.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** River knew though that the quarry work was important. The next day, she decided to share a secret of hers with Korra and Claire, a secret she had when using the trucks.

**River:** You know something you two, I like working to a musical rhythm. And so do the trucks in fact, why don't you give it a try me hearties?

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Korra and Claire weren't so sure about this but decided to give it a go. They buffered up to their trains and sang as they tried to move them.

**Korra and Claire:** _(singing)_ Here we go, here we go, here we go! No we don't, no we don't, no we don't, don't, don't!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** _(giggles)_ I just love that bit, that's brilliant! But seriously though, no matter how hard they tried, Korra and Claire just couldn't move the trucks the way River could. Tennille didn't really bother trying as she decided to just get on with it. After giving up on River's idea, Korra and Claire did their shunting the same way they did before and it paid off as, along with Tennille and River, the important job was eventually finished. Later that day, the Fat Director arrived at the quarry and he was surprised to see that the job had been completed.

**The Fat Director:** _(proudly)_ Well done you four!

**Tennille:** It was River sir, we couldn't have done it without her.

**The Fat Director:** In that case, I've got a bigger job for you River.

**River:** _(miserably)_ Ay-ay sir. What kind of a quarry is it?

**The Fat Director:** Quarry? Oh no, no, no, I'm not sending you to work at another quarry River. Where I'm sending you to work now's the docks.

**River:** _(exclaims)_ The docks?! The docks are armed by the sea, oh thank you sir! This reminds me of a time in bimini.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** And River was telling stories again! River loves working at the docks. She gets more work done than any three engines and feels really useful. And only the trucks know her secret. Hey wait a minute, it's not just the trucks, I also know the secret now!

**And that's episode 101/episode 28 of T&FMLA Series 4 done! Hope you enjoyed my parody of TTTE episode **_**'Salty's Secret'**_**. Please review, I request criticism and I apologise if it's a bit short. And on that bombshell, it's time to end, thanks very much for reading, goodnight!**


	29. A Sleepless Crane

**Tonight - Korra and Claire are full of mischief, Kong causes confusion and River tells a story overnight.**

_**Tornado and Friends Mainline Adventures**_

Hello readers of this not very good and not so popular fanfic series, this' Olton Hall, aka Hogwarts Castle here and Kong the Crane's basically our equivalent of that Thomas character Cranky, as you may've noticed with the episodes he has appeared in so far in the history of this series. And as for today's episode, things our no different with him as he causes confusion at the docks, blocking River, Korra and Claire from doing any work, such a cranky twat is that crane! What did he do exactly? Well find out now as I narrate what turned out to be our version of TTTE episode _'No Sleep For Cranky'_. Enjoy!

**This episode stars:**

**Kong the Crane**

**BR Class 07 Shunting Diesel no.07 007 (who we named River)**

**Korra the Class 11 Shunting Diesel**

**Claire the Class 12 Shunting Diesel**

**BR Class 55 Deltic Diesel no.55 022 **_**'Royal Scots Grey'**_

**GWR 9400 Class no.9466 (who we named Hawksworth)**

**GWR 4575 Class no.5521/London Transport no.L150 (who we named Prairie)**

**The Fat Director**

Episode 102: A Sleepless Crane

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** The docks is one of the busiest places on the Great British mainline. It's where ships, engines and cranes alike are kept busy day and night on everyday of the year. However, poor Kong the Crane never gets to take a single nap. He never gets to sleep early and he works all the time. And his only company are the gulls that settle on his arm. Therefore, Kong's always just as cranky as the Thomas character. One day, Kong was loading some flatbed trucks with metal pipes when River whirred up to him.

**River:** _(calls)_ Ahoy there Kong!

**Kong:** _(snaps)_ Where've you been?!

**River:** And a good day to you to cap'n!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Just then, Korra and Claire arrived for work and they were both full of mischief. Kong barked woof-woof at them.

**Kong:** _(furiously)_ I didn't bark like a dog at them Olton Hall you red retard!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Geez I was only joking, chill out!

**Kong:** _(barks)_ Anyway, hurry up you metal boxes on wheels, I haven't got all day!

**Korra:** _(grumbles)_ You're no fun.

**Kong:** _(snaps)_ You wouldn't be fun if you were stuck up here!

**Korra:** Ohhhh, so that's why you're always cranky.

**Claire:** You're lonely.

**Kong:** _(cranks)_ I'm not!

**River:** So it's company you'd be needing? Well it reminds me of a lonely old banks lighthouse keeper.

**Kong:** _(cries)_ Not another one of your stories!

**Korra and Claire:** _(chimes)_ Oh please River, we've never heard it!

**River:** Twas in the middle of a wee naughty storm. The likes of which you only see once in a lifetime.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** This made Kong absolutely furious that he'd now completely lost the plot! He was so cranky that he swung his arm around and dropped the pipes onto the tracks instead of the trucks. One of the metal pipes rolled across the ground and knocked loose a shed support. The shed behind River wobbled for a few moments before eventually losing its balance and falling over, landing on the ground with a loud CRASH. For Kong, that wasn't supposed to happen.

**Kong:** _(weekly)_ Whoops.

**River:** You've blown the main now matey!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** The engines were trapped.

**Korra and Claire:** _(singing teasingly to Kong)_ You're going to get into trouble!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Kong heard their teasing and quickly turned away from them. Meanwhile, the Fat Director was in his office being measured for a new waistcoat but when he heard he immediately left his office, got into his car and headed straight for the docks. The Fat Director knew that any delay at the docks can cause confusion…well doesn't everything nowadays?! Before long, the Fat Director arrived at the docks and made his way to Kong and the engines. Using a megaphone, he spoke sternly to Kong.

**The Fat Director:** _(sternly)_ You've made a terrible mess Kong! As punishment, you'll not be doing anymore work for the rest of the day!

**Kong:** _(whispers apologetically)_ Yes sir, I'm sorry sir.

**The Fat Director:** You engines will have to stay here tonight until I send an engine to bring the breakdown cranes to clear up this mess in the morning!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** The engines understood the order and the Fat Director then drove away. If Kong had a heart, it would've now well and truly sunk as River uttered those faithful words.

**River:** That reminds me of a story! It was a bitter cold winter. The brave little ship was stuck until the ice melted the next spring. He barely made it round the cape. After a hundred scary days at sea without a scratch, he sailed into port and crashed his bow, not fifteen feet from my buffers! Luckily, no one was hurt.

**Kong:** _(whales)_ Except my ears! _(whispers to himself)_ For god sake, I do wish that bastard would just shut the bloody hell up.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** The engines didn't hear his whisper thankfully. River spent all night telling tales to Korra and Claire, tales of powerful storms, daring rescues and brave little ships. And when the sun rose the next day, he was still talking and talking and talking.

**Kong:** _(groans)_ I can't take anymore!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** I know just how he feels because I can't really stand River's stories either. Just then, they all heard a horn that didn't sound like one you'd find from a ship. Kong looked over and saw Royal Scots Grey approaching with the breakdown train in two behind him.

**Royal Scots Grey:** Hello everyone, the Fat Director sent me to bring the breakdown cranes and help clear away this mess.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Kong was delighted when he saw Royal Scots Grey. In fact, he was so pleased that the engines would be going soon that he forgot to be cranky.

**Kong:** I'll never misbehave again, as long as I don't have to listen to anymore of River's stories!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** A few hours later, after much hard work, the mess was all cleared up and the docks was back to being a busy and packed place again. To make things better, Kong was working hard all throughout the day. He carefully loaded trucks, helped speed the engines on their way and he said 'please' and 'thank you'.

**Hawksworth:** _(puffs)_ I must say that this' new from you Kong.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** However, Hawksworth had spoken too soon. Kong couldn't help himself and with his latest load of metal pipes. He dropped it onto the tracks again but this time he still managed to hold them.

**Prairie:** Well it was nice while it lasted eh guys?

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** And then Hawksworth, Prairie and Royal Scots Grey all laughed. As for Kong, well he can still be cranky, and…well what more needs to be said?

**And that's episode 102/episode 29 of T&FMLA Series 4 done! Hope you enjoyed my parody of TTTE episode **_**'No Sleep For Cranky'**_**. Please review, I request criticism and I apologise if it's a bit short. And on that bombshell, it's time to end, thanks very much for reading, goodnight!**


	30. The Broken Whistle

**Tonight - a black 5 loses his whistle, a standard 5 also loses his whistle and an organ plays some music.**

_**Tornado and Friends Mainline Adventures**_

Hello readers of this not very good and not so popular fanfic series, this' Olton Hall, aka Hogwarts Castle here and we engines all know that we can't run along the mainline without our whistles because that'll be dangerous. But when the recently brought onto the mainline engine Merlin lost his whistle, it turned out that he could still work because he had a rather clever alternative, although he didn't really like the sound of it. What was that alternative? Well find out now as I narrate what turned out to be our version of TTTE episode _'Faulty Whistles'_. Enjoy!

**This episode stars:**

**BR Standard Class 5 no.73096 (who we shall name Merlin, after one of his scrapped siblings) and his driver**

**LMS Black 5 no.45407 **_**'Lancashire Fusilier'**_

**LNER K4 no.61994 **_**'The Great Marquess'**_

**Class 55 Deltic Diesel no.55 002 **_**'Kings Own Yorkshire Light Infantry'**_** (KOYLI)**

**BR Standard Class 7 Britannia no.70000 **_**'Britannia'**_

**Eliza the Vintage Lorry**

**Michelle the Tractor**

**A Prize Bull**

**A Headmaster**

Episode 103: The Broken Whistle

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** It was early morning in Great Britain. Merlin was waiting for Lancashire Fusilier who was bringing him some trucks which needed to be delivered to all the stations along his route. Merlin was also to take the headmaster and the new organ. While they were waiting, the headmaster was playing a lively tune on his organ. Meanwhile, Lancashire Fusilier had steamed all through the night to bring Merlin his trucks filled with the delivery items. However, as he approached the junction, he came across some trees with some low hanging branches on them. He puffed carefully past them but just when he thought he was in the clear, a low hanging branch knocked his whistle off. Lancashire Fusilier was gutted because this meant he couldn't work until he got a new one. He carried on despite being without a whistle and soon delivered Merlin's trucks. With the trucks coupled up to Merlin and flatbed trucks containing the organ which was being held down onto its truck with strong ropes, Lancashire Fusilier was parked into a nearby siding so some workmen could check on him after losing his whistle.

**Lancashire Fusilier:** _(chuffs sadly)_ I can't run on the tracks without my whistle because that'd be too dangerous.

**Merlin:** _(boastfully)_ And engine's not an engine without a whistle!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** And just to prove his point, Merlin let off a big blast of his whistle! However, Lancashire Fusilier just ignored him. Merlin chuffed away in a big huff, he was cross.

**Merlin:** _(huffs)_ They're all jealous of my fine whistle!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Merlin was soon chuffing through the countryside. He whistled at some sheep, however they were too busy eating the grass to take any notice.

**Merlin:** _(crossly)_ Pah, I need to whistle louder and longer next time!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Before long, Merlin was approaching a level crossing where Eliza the Vintage Lorry was waiting with a farmers prize bull. This time, Merlin whistled as loud and as long as he could!

**Prize Bull:** MOO!

**Eliza:** _(calls)_ Stop that nonsense Merlin!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Merlin didn't listen to Eliza though as he puffed through the crossing and then carried on cheerfully down the track. He failed to notice though that his whistle had come loose and was now rattling about. Further down the line, Merlin spotted Michelle the Tractor plowing a field.

**Merlin:** _(chortles)_ She'll get the loudest and the longest whistle yet!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** When the timing was right, Merlin sounded his whistle. He blew it so hard that the whistle shot off like a mighty rocket and landed out of sight! The noise really startled Michelle.

**Michelle:** _(shocked)_ Holy shit, what the hell was that?!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** That, Michelle, was Merlin's whistle thinking it was a rocket. Speaking of which, everyone went searching around the area Michelle was working at in the hopes of finding Merlin's whistle. Unfortunately though, it was nowhere to be seen. Merlin wasn't going anywhere now and he was feeling miserable because he knew this was all his fault. He never should've boasted by using his whistle. Ha, serves him right!

**Merlin:** _(furiously)_ Oh shut up will ya!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** _(sighs)_ Why's it that every time I do a joke, the engine I'm joking with insults me? Oh I don't know, but lets just get on with it. Merlin's driver knew what a missing whistle meant.

**Merlin's Driver:** We're stuck! We can't move without a whistle because it'd be too dangerous.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Just then, the headmaster had an idea.

**Headmaster:** Leave it to me!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Merlin and his footplate crew weren't sure what the headmaster was planning but presumed that he knew what he was doing, therefore they carried on their journey even though Merlin had no whistle. For the rest of the day, Merlin didn't make a sound, excluding his chuffing sound of course, but the headmasters organ did. As Merlin delivered his trucks, the headmaster tooted the organ at ever crossing and at every stop. It alerted everyone just as much as a whistle would, although Merlin didn't seem to think so because he thought his new 'whistle' sounded rather retarded. But all the same, he still didn't say a single word and just got on with his deliveries. Eventually, there was only one delivery left to make. Merlin rounded a bend and saw the final station up ahead. The headmaster tooted the organ as they approached. Merlin stopped at the station and the last truck was uncoupled. The headmaster tooted the organ again as Merlin set off. The sun was now starting to set, meaning it was too late to deliver the organ now so Merlin headed back to the yards. While on the way there, the headmaster played the same lively tune he played earlier in the day. Merlin wasn't really listening to the music though because he was thinking about what the other engines would say about all this. When he finally steamed quietly the yards, the headmaster carried on playing the organ and there were some other engines there.

**The Great Marquess:** _(teasingly)_ Hey look everyone, it's Merlin the musical engine!

**KOYLI:** Lets whistle and honk along!

**Britannia:** TOOT-TOOT!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Despite the teasing of the other engines though, Lancashire Fusilier, who now had a shiny new whistle, felt sorry for Merlin.

**Lancashire Fusilier:** Well Merlin, you really did well to deliver your goods without a whistle.

**Merlin:** Do you really think so?

**Lancashire Fusilier:** Absolutely, even though an engine's not an engine without a whistle! _(he blows his whistle)_

**Headmaster:** _(chuckles)_ Or an organ!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** The headmaster then tooted the organ once more and all the engines whistled and honked back…well, all except Merlin who just grinned and he promised to deliver the organ first thing tomorrow morning.

**And that's episode 103/episode 30 of T&FMLA Series 4 done! Hope you enjoyed my parody of TTTE episode **_**'Faulty Whistles'**_**. Please review, I request criticism and I apologise if it's a bit short. And on that bombshell, it's time to end, thanks very much for reading, goodnight!**


	31. A Bad Day for Harry

**Tonight - Tornado wears a hat, Nunney Castle wears a hat and Duchess of Sutherland wears a hat.**

_**Tornado and Friends Mainline Adventures**_

Hello readers of this not very good and not so popular fanfic series, this' Olton Hall, aka Hogwarts Castle here and my little tank engine friends Swindon and Pannier love taking the mail. However, they don't really like it when Harry the Helicopter helps them out because they feel delivering the mail's an engines job…and so it should be! But all the same, Swindon had to help Harry on one occasion, as you shall find out now as I narrate what turned out to be our version of TTTE episode _'A Bad Day for Harold the Helicopter'_ . Enjoy…oh and by the way, look out for Tornado, Nunney Castle and Duchess of Sutherland trying out a new breed of fashion for steam engines!

**This episode stars:**

**GWR 5700 Class no.9600 (who we named Swindon) and his driver**

**GWR 5700 Class no.7752/London Transport no.L94 (who we named Pannier)**

**LNER Peppercorn A1 no.60163 **_**'Tornado'**_

**GWR Castle no.5029 **_**'Nunney Castle'**_

**LMS Princess Coronation no.46233 **_**'Duchess of Sutherland'**_

**BR Standard Class 8 no.71000 **_**'Duke of Gloucester'**_

**Harry the Helicopter and his pilot**

**The Fat Director**

**A Signal Engineer**

Episode 104: A Bad Day for Harry

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Harry the Helicopter loves flying up in the bright blue sky over the Great British mainline. He looks out to see if anyone's in distress. On occasion, he even delivers the mail which makes Swindon and Pannier very cross because taking the mail was their job.

**Harry:** Alright chaps, the mail run's done. Is there anymore because I can deliver it for you both in a jiff, that's what friends are for.

**Swindon:** _(grumpily)_ Delivering the mail's an engines job!

**Pannier:** _(crossly)_ Yeah Harry, that's why we do it! Therefore you've got no right to take over our duties you nosey bastard!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Harry just shrugged off their anger and took off into the night sky en route for his base. The next morning, Swindon was on his way to collecting his mail trucks. Swindon's given loads of jobs but taking the mail's his favourite because it makes him feel really useful. He soon arrived at the yards and was just being coupled up to his mail trucks when he spotted a now apple green liveried Tornado, Nunney Castle and Duchess of Sutherland talking about something. Swindon still had a few minutes before he had to leave so he decided to listen in on what the girls were talking about.

**Tornado:** So why are we wearing these special hats again?

**Nunney Castle:** Well, apparently some fashion designers wanted to try something for steam engines and they needed some engines to try out their first piece of fashion which was these hats.

**Tornado:** So why's it us trying them out then?

**Nunney Castle:** They said they'd created one for an A1, a Castle and a Duchess. And it shows 'cause they clearly fit around our funnels and you may've noticed that the hats have no top because if it had a top, the steam form our funnels would blow them off. So basically, what we have here are topless hats that fit around a specific steam engines funnel, presumably to keep them warm in the cold times.

**Duchess of Sutherland:** _(worryingly)_ I can't imagine what my boyfriend would say if he saw me wearing this though.

**Nunney Castle:** Oh don't you worry Duchess, I'm pretty sure Duke of Gloucester would admire you.

**Tornado:** _(cheekily)_ Yeah, he'll admire you once it's taken off of you.

**Nunney Castle:** _(angrily)_ Oh be quiet Tornado you cheeky bitch!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Alright, alright, moving on from that, it was finally time for Swindon to leave and get on with his mail run. The trip was all going well so far as Swindon was making all his deliveries right on time and he was happy. At this point he was steaming along the track.

**Swindon:** _(chuffs)_ Must remain on time, must remain on time!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Then there was trouble. As Swindon approached a signal box, he found that the signal was red, meaning he had to stop. As he stopped though, he could see that an engineer was working on the signal, which must mean the signal was broken. The signal engineers told Swindon and his footplate crew that they had no idea how long it would take to fix the signal. Swindon wasn't going anywhere now because he knew it was unsafe for engines to run without signals. He was feeling very upset about this situation though.

**Swindon:** _(cries)_ I'm going to be late and it's not even my fault!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Meanwhile, the Fat Director was in his office enjoying his toast and marmalade, not for the first time, when the telephone rang. He felt cross about being interrupted, again while he was in the middle of a meal, but answered once a swallowed a big bite of his toast.

**The Fat Director:** Hello…Swindon's stuck at a broken signal is he…right, I'll send Harry to collect the mail from him!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** The hours past and Swindon was still waiting and the poor little fellow was still feeling very upset. He remembered what happened the last time he was delayed; the mail was given to Harry.

**Swindon:** _(sighs)_ That moment really did make me feel like a really useless engine.

**Swindon's Driver:** Still, the mail must arrive on time.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Just then, they heard a familiar buzzing sound coming from above. They looked up and saw Harry approaching. He landed on the grassy area beside the track.

**Harry:** Hello, the Fat Director says that you need my help, that's what friends are for!

**Swindon:** _(cries)_ Oh bollocks!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** The Fat Director had made his mind up though and Swindon knew that there was nothing he could do now. Swindon's footplate crew and Harry's pilot and co-pilot worked together to carry the mail bags out of Swindon's mail trucks and towards Harry and his cargo net. They initially loaded about a quarter of the mail into the cargo net when Harry's pilot had a thought.

**Harry's Pilot:** Maybe we should leave it there and take the mail bags a few at a time, they're very heavy after all.

**Harry:** If we do that then I'd have to make twice as many trips, meaning I'd be as slow as Swindon.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Swindon heard that and felt insulted as he watched his footplate crew along with Harry's pilot and co-pilot load all the mail bags into the cargo net at once. As the signal engineers continued to work on the broken signal, Swindon could only watch as Harry took off into the air with his cargo net filled up with heavy mail bags. He'd just managed to lift his cargo net off the ground when one of the signal engineers cried out.

**Signal Engineer:** It's fixed!

**Swindon:** _(shouts)_ Wait Harry, I'm ready to go!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** But it was too late. Harry had already taken off and couldn't hear Swindon shouting at him. Poor Swindon watched the mail disappear, he was now feeling even more upset than before. Suddenly, they all heard a strange sound coming from the sky. Everyone looked up and saw that Harry was still there. He was trying to rise his cargo net higher into the sky but its very heavyweight was weighing him down. All this effort was starting to make his engine splutter loudly. The heavy cargo net eventually got the better of him as he tried to move forward but found himself going forward and down. Even more trouble then lay ahead.

**Harry's Pilot:** _(cries)_ Watch out for those trees Harry!

**Harry:** _(whales)_ My net's too heavy!

**Swindon:** _(cries)_ Harry's in trouble, we must try to help him!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Swindon could only watch as Harry was finally relieved of his cargo net which found itself nestled into the tree. As for Harry himself, even though he was finally rid of that heavyweight underneath him, his engine eventually spluttered to a stop and it wasn't long before he found himself nose-diving into a haystack. With a loud CRASH, Harry buried himself into the haystack. His rotors were also badly damaged on the crash. I'm guessing he didn't explode in the crash was so that the actual episode wasn't scary to the viewers because there's no place for actual death whatsoever. As for his pilot and co-pilot, well they weren't killed in the crash but they did pick up some severe injuries. Swindon gasped in horror as he witnessed the accident. He hastily headed over to the scene of the disaster.

**Swindon:** _(calls)_ Are you alright Harry?!

**Harry:** _(sputters)_ Just go and get someone to help me out of this haystack!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** So Swindon did so as he raced away as fast as he could. I'm not going to reveal how Harry was rescued because I've got absolutely no bloody idea, therefore we'll just cut straight to the ending! A few days later, Harry's engine was fixed, his rotor was mended and he was flying again, with a new pilot and co-pilot though as his old pilot and co-pilot were still in hospital recovering from their injuries. Swindon was very pleased to see Harry.

**Swindon:** _(teasingly)_ Fancy taking the mail Harry? I'll stand by with the rescue team.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** All the engines in the area tooted their whistles and Harry hovered so low that only Swindon could hear.

**Harry:** _(whispers)_ Thanks for getting help to get me out of that haystack dear chap.

**Swindon:** That's alright, that's what friends are for.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** And then Harry rose up into the sky once more. Oh and by the way, do you want to know what Duke of Gloucester really thought of those new hats when he saw Duchess of Sutherland wearing one?

**Duke of Gloucester:** _(smiling)_ I don't really care about the hats babe. If you want to wear them then that's absolutely fine by me, but in all honesty, you look just as beautiful with them as you do without them. And I also look forward to when you're repainted into LMS Crimson Late livery at the start of next year. I bet you'll be just as beautiful then as you are now.

**Duchess of Sutherland:** _(blushing)_ Aw, thank you so much my handsome Duke. I'm so happy I've got you as my boyfriend. Now, lets get to work.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** And before any of you say so…NOT THAT SORT OF WORK YOU BUNCH OF FILTHY ANIMALS!

**And that's episode 104/episode 31 of T&FMLA Series 4 done! Hope you enjoyed my parody of TTTE episode **_**'A Bad Day for Harold the Helicopter'**_**. Please review and I request criticism. And on that bombshell, it's time to end, thanks very much for reading, goodnight!**


	32. The Big Competition

**Tonight - a black 5 smells of fish, Princess Elizabeth reveals something about her and we find a way to make cabbage leaves useful.**

_**Tornado and Friends Mainline Adventures**_

Hello readers of this not very good and not so popular fanfic series, this' Olton Hall, aka Hogwarts Castle here and we here on the Great British mainline like to decorate all our stations with flowers in the summertime. However, one engine who wasn't really having a good summer at the time of the starting of this episode was my black 5 friend Roy 'Korky' Green. He was reeking of the smell of fish after bringing trains to and from the docks all day. Although he was feeling better once he was cleaned up, he had an encounter with an animal on the track. And this animal was later believed to have caused trouble at one of the decorated stations. What animal was it exactly? Well find out now as I narrate what turned out to be our version of TTTE episode _'Baa!'_. Enjoy!

**This episode stars:**

**LMS Black 5 no.45212 **_**'Roy 'Korky' Green'**_** and his footplate crew**

**GWR King no.6024 **_**'King Edward I'**_

**LMS 8F no.48151 **_**'Gauge O Guild'**_

**LMS Princess Royal no.46201 **_**'Princess Elizabeth'**_

**LNER Peppercorn A1 no.60163 **_**'Tornado'**_

**The Fat Director**

**A Stationmaster**

**Some Passengers**

**Some Boys**

**Harry the Helicopter **_**(mentioned)**_

Episode 105: The Big Competition

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** In the summertime, the Great British mainline, not just the whole country, gleams in the sunshine and all the stations are decorated with flowers. And when I say all of them, I really do mean ALL of them! Roy 'Korky' Green had been bringing trains to and from the docks all day and he was really started to get tired of the smell of fish, especially since he was now reeking of that revolting stink. PHEW, even I can smell that bastard from where I am in this freaking museum!

**Roy 'Korky' Green:** Was calling me a bastard really necessary Olton Hall?

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** No, not really.

**Roy 'Korky' Green:** _(crossly)_ Then would you kindly get on with it!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Alright, alright, bloody hell!

**Roy 'Korky' Green's Driver:** Come on Korky, it's time to head to where the Fat Director arranged to meet us and some of the other engines for that announcement.

**Roy 'Korky' Green:** Please sir, can't I have a wash down first?

**Roy 'Korky' Green's Driver:** Sorry Korky but there's no time. Besides, the Fat Director will be waiting for us and we won't want to keep him waiting any longer.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** So Roy 'Korky' Green sadly headed off to the meeting, still reeking of the smell of fish as he steamed onwards. He soon arrived and just as he reversed into his siding, the Fat Director walked up to him and the other engines holding a sign that read 'Best Dressed Station'.

**The Fat Director:** There's to be a festival of flowers and this sign I'm holding in my hands will be rewarded to the winner.

**Gauge O Guild:** POOP-POOP!

**The Fat Director:** Was that whistling really necessary Gauge O Guild?

**Gauge O Guild:** _(apologetically)_ Not really sir, sorry sir.

**The Fat Director:** Anyways, I want all of you and all of your mainline friends to help with the arrangements.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** The engines were all excited.

**King Edward I:** My favourite station's Dawlish.

**Princess Elizabeth:** Our favourite station's St Pancras. Roy 'Korky' Green, which station's the most favourite of thou?

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Roy 'Korky' Green however was too tired to think properly.

**Roy 'Korky' Green:** _(murmurs)_ The docks.

**King Edward I:** _(sniffs)_ Huh, we can tell!

**Princess Elizabeth:** _(laughs)_ Oh Roy 'Korky' Green my loyal subject, the docks is full of fish not flowers.

**Roy 'Korky' Green:** Alright then, Tyseley!

**Princess Elizabeth:** That's thy home.

**Roy 'Korky' Green :** And that's why I like it, especially when you're there and not here telling me I'm silly, goodnight!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** And then Roy 'Korky' Green wheeshed away indignantly. Just then, King Edward I had a thought.

**King Edward I:** Lizzie, why are you speaking like this nowadays? I mean, I'm may very well be a King but you don't see me addressing the other engines in third person.

**Princess Elizabeth:** Thou may indeed be a King, but as a Princess Royal, your Princess feels that she needs to speak to her fellow engines in such an appropriate manner to go with her royal status.

**King Edward I:** But did you have to refer to 'Roy Korky Green' as your loyal subject?

**Princess Elizabeth:** _(quietly and admittingly)_ No, not really.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** The next morning, Roy 'Korky' Green had a wash down and was proud to be sparkling again. He puffed into the yards to collect some trucks loaded with vegetables and flowers.

**Roy 'Korky' Green's Driver:** These are for St Pancras. They'll display them on all the platforms.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** With the trucks coupled up and fully loaded, Roy 'Korky' Green set off en route for St Pancras station. Once he was out in the countryside, he came across Harry the Helicopter flying overhead.

**Roy 'Korky' Green:** What's Harry buzzing about for?! I haven't got time for anything he wants today!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Just then, his driver spotted something up ahead.

**Roy 'Korky' Green's Driver:** What's that?!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Roy 'Korky' Green looked ahead and saw what his driver could see.

**Roy 'Korky' Green:** Why fuck me it's a ram! _(stops just in front of the ram, speaks crossly)_ Now we're going to be late! I should've known that Harry was trying to tell us something!

**Ram:** Baa!

**Roy 'Korky' Green's Fireman:** _(cries)_ I got just the ticket to get him of the track, food!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** The fireman quickly found some cabbage leaves and placed them a few metres from the track. Once the ram saw the cabbage leaves, he walked off the track and chomped happily away. Roy 'Korky' Green was very pleased that this brief ordeal was over.

**Roy 'Korky' Green :** _(whistles)_ PEEP-PEEP! Please can we go now?

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Roy 'Korky' Green set off again and the ram continued to happily chomp away on the cabbage leaves. When he arrived at St Pancras station, his driver told the stationmaster about what had happened.

**Stationmaster:** Oh I've heard about this ram, he's always hungry you see.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** A little while later, St Pancras station was decked with flowers. As Roy 'Korky' Green puffed into the station to complete a light passenger train service, he was very impressed with what he could see.

**Roy 'Korky' Green:** St Pancras will win first prize for sure.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Roy 'Korky' Green then left his coaches and headed into the nearest siding to the station for a much needed rest.

**Roy 'Korky' Green:** _(yawns)_ Time for a snooze.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** But it wasn't because quite suddenly he heard a crashing sound from nearby. It sounded like fruit and vegetables were being squashed and flowerpots were being smashed.

**Roy 'Korky' Green's Driver:** We'd better see what all that noise's about.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Roy 'Korky' Green quickly wheeshed out of the siding and headed back to St Pancras station. When he arrived, he was shocked as he saw flowers and fruit and vegetables were scattered everywhere.

**Roy 'Korky' Green's Driver:** It that ram, he has made a meal of the station to.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Then there was more trouble.

**Passengers:** _(cries)_ We can't get into the waiting room!

**Stationmaster:** Why not?

**Passengers:** _(angrily)_ The ram won't let us!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** It turned out that the passengers were right when the stationmaster and Roy 'Korky' Green had a look through the waiting room windows. Everyone looked at the ram and the ram looked at them.

**Ram:** Baa!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Just then, Roy 'Korky' Green's driver noticed something.

**Roy 'Korky' Green's Driver:** _(exclaims)_ He's not alone!

**Boys:** _(begging)_ Let us out please, we're very sorry!

**Stationmaster:** Well, would you look at that. The boys are our culprits, not the ram. He was just making sure that they didn't do anymore damage.

**Boys:** _(apologetically)_ We thought it would be fun but it wasn't, we'll help put everything back!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** And that's what they did and before long, St Pancras was redecorated to how it was before the accident, it was now back to looking absolutely fantastic. A few days later, the Fat Director invited some of the engines over to St Pancras station which was the winner of the 'Best Dressed Station' award.

**Roy 'Korky' Green:** _(whispers)_ I'm sorry Princess Elizabeth, you made the right choice.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Princess Elizabeth smiled in response but remained quiet. She didn't really want to speak at that moment anyway because she could see that the Fat Director was about to make an announcement.

**The Fat Director:** There's one more prize for our good friend the ram and here it is! _(reveals a pumpkin)_ I'll eat my hat if you don't like it.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** It was a this moment that Tornado, who was also present, decided to have a little bit of cheeky fun. She wheeshed some steam and it was enough to blow the Fat Director's hat off of his head and it landed right in front of the ram who then ate the whole thing up.

**Ram:** Baa!

**Tornado:** _(giggling cheekily)_ Whoops, sorry sir.

**The Fat Director:** Well, it seems I now wouldn't be able to eat my hat even if I had to.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Everyone laughed and Tornado was relieved that the Fat Director saw the funny side of her cheeky little joke. The only sound heard from the ram though was a contented hiccup.

**Ram:** HIC!

**And that's episode 105/episode 32 of T&FMLA Series 4 done! Hope you enjoyed my parody of TTTE episode **_**'Baa!'**_**. Please review and I request criticism. And on that bombshell, it's time to end, thanks very much for reading, goodnight!**


	33. Flatbeds of Fear

**Tonight - River tells us a scary tale, Gauge O Guild says the same line numerous times and for once Earl of Mount Edgcumbe's not performing some sort of tribute act.**

_**Tornado and Friends Mainline Adventures**_

Hello readers of this not very good and not so popular fanfic series, this' Olton Hall, aka Hogwarts Castle here and through my experiences with Harry Potter, I damn well know that there's no such thing as ghosts. But how'd you feel if you first heard of the 'flatbeds of fear' eh? Well River had some of my friends convinced about the very same thing as in that recent Thomas episode once. So readers, make sure you sit back, relax and enjoy reading what turned out to be our version of T&F episode _'Flatbeds of Fear'_ with me as your narrator. Enjoy!

**This episode stars:**

**BR Class 07 Shunting Diesel no.07 007 (who we named River)**

**LMS Black 5 no.44932 (who we named Solaris)**

**LMS 8F no.48151 **_**'Gauge O Guild'**_

**BR Class 47 Duff Diesel no.47 580 **_**'County of Essex'**_

**GWR Castle no.5043 **_**'Earl of Mount Edgcumbe'**_

**Korra the Class 11 Shunting Diesel**

**Claire the Class 12 Shunting Diesel**

**Kong the Crane**

Episode 106: Flatbeds of Fear

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** It was a misty day in Great Britain. Over at the docks, Kong the Crane was unloading a big shipment of building supplies when Solaris puffed in. He saw his waiting flatbed trucks. He was just about to move into position when he suddenly heard a strange sound.

**Solaris:** What's that noise?

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** River the dockside diesel heard the noise to.

**River:** Ah, I think that'll be the 'flatbeds of fear' Solaris.

**Solaris:** The flatbeds of fear? What're they?

**River:** Well now my big friend, long, long ago, an old engine was puffing along the tracks with a train of flatbeds. When suddenly, his coupling snapped and the flatbeds rolled away. Now, the flatbeds roll the rails a whistling and a wailing and looking for an engine to couple up to them. So me hearty, beware of the flatbeds of fear, they might come rolling after you.

**Kong:** Enough of your tall tales River! Solaris has got work to do! Off you go Solaris!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** So Solaris did indeed get back to work. He changed tracks and buffered up to his trucks of pipes. When he was coupled onto them, he whistled out of the docks.

**River:** Hahaha, watch out for the flatbeds of fear Solaris, you never know when they'll come rolling by!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Solaris heard River but wished he didn't. As he clattered along the line, he was doing his best to forget about the subject of the flatbeds of fear. After all, he was a big and powerful black 5 so he can't be scared of such things a the flatbeds of fear! As Solaris continued onwards, he suddenly heard that strange noise again.

**Solaris:** What's that?

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Solaris looked around but he couldn't see anything that could've possibly made the mysterious sound. He had to admit it, he was slightly scared. He soon arrived at the yards where he found Gauge O Guild and County of Essex.

**County of Essex:** Hello Solaris.

**Solaris:** I've just heard the flatbeds of fear.

**Gauge O Guild:** The flat whom of what?

**Solaris:** The flatbeds of fear, River told me about them. They roam the rails in search of an engine and they whistle and wail.

**Gauge O Guild:** _(worryingly)_ That sounds spooky.

**Solaris:** It was.

**County of Essex:** Huh, don't be such a couple of scaredy steamies, there must be a perfectly sensible explanation.

**Gauge O Guild:** _(worryingly)_ I hope so, I really do. _(whistles away)_

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** The next morning, the mist was still about as Gauge O Guild was puffing along to collect the pipes Solaris dropped off at the yard yesterday and take them to the building site they were needed at. Gauge O Guild himself though was still worried about what Solaris had told him yesterday.

**Gauge O Guild:** _(worryingly)_ I don't want to hear the flatbeds of fear, I don't want to hear the flatbeds of fear. _(MOO! Gauge of Guild gasps in horror)_ Oh no, it's the flatbeds of fear!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** But it was just a cow on a field. Gauge O Guild was relieved but his worries were still about.

**Gauge O Guild:** _(worryingly)_ I don't want to hear the flatbeds of fear, I don't want to hear the flatbeds of fear. _(there's a whistling sound, Gauge O Guild gasps in horror)_ It's the flatbeds of fear!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** I turned out though to be just a guard blowing his whistle. Again, Gauge O Guild was relieved but his worries still weren't gone. Gauge O Guild was soon at the yards where he collected the pipes and was now on his way to the building site. Hey wait a minute…oh no, I know what's coming next.

**Gauge O Guild:** _(worryingly)_ I don't want to hear the flatbeds of fear, I don't want to hear the flatbeds of fear.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** I thought so and by god that's getting very bloody irritating! Anyway, Gauge O Guild suddenly heard the exact same whistling and wailing Solaris heard yesterday.

**Gauge O Guild:** _(scared)_ Oh no, that's not a cow in a field or a guard blowing his whistle, so it must be…the flatbeds of fear!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Poor Gauge O Guild was now too scared to keep on puffing so he slowed right down which made his driver take him onto a siding thinking there was something wrong. Gauge O Guild stopped and he wouldn't budge. When the news about him was spread, County of Essex was called to collect the pipes and take them to the building site. She soon arrived on the scene and stopped next to a frightened Gauge O Guild

**County of Essex:** _(annoyed)_ You're being very silly Gauge O Guild, there really are no such things as the flatbeds of fear!

**Gauge O Guild:** But there are, I heard them!

**County of Essex:** Nonsense! What did you actually hear?

**Gauge O Guild:** _(uncouples from trucks and puffs out of the way)_ I heard whistling and a wailing sound, just like Solaris said!

**County of Essex:** _(moves and is coupled up to the trucks)_ Oh, well I still think there must be a sensible explanation.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** With County of Essex coupled up to the trucks, she set off feeling very annoyed about this whole ordeal. A few miles down the track though, she was now hearing that strange noise also.

**County of Essex:** What's that noise? Is that you Solaris?!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** But County of Essex couldn't see Solaris anywhere. She then heard the strange noise again.

**County of Essex:** Gauge O Guild, is that you?!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** But there was no sign of Gauge O Guild. County of Essex raced away as fast as she could but the whistling and wailing was right behind her.

**County of Essex:** _(scared)_ Oh no, maybe there isn't a sensible explanation, maybe it really is, the flatbeds of fear!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** County of Essex whirred faster and faster trying to get away from the flatbeds of fear. Then there was trouble. County of Essex took a turn too fast, the pipes came loose and rattled off the flatbeds. County of Essex screeched to a stop when she heard the pipes crashing onto the ground.

**County of Essex:** Oh fuck me! _(listens and sighs with relief)_ Well, at least I can't hear the flatbeds of fear anymore, they must've gone off after another engine.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** It wasn't too long before Earl of Mount Edgcumbe arrived with the breakdown cranes which soon began lifting the pipes back onto County of Essex's trucks.

**County of Essex:** Wait a minute Earl of Mount Edgcumbe, aren't you supposed to be doing some sort of Rik Mayall tribute act like you've been doing recently?

**Earl of Mount Edgcumbe:** _(annoyed)_ I would be if any engine wanted to partner me! King Edward I no longer wanted to do it and no other engine wants to replace him, just a bunch of total bastards if you ask me!

**County of Essex:** Well with the things you've been doing, aren't they a bit reckless for steam engines?

**Earl of Mount Edgcumbe:** _(angrily)_ Whatever!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Soon, the breakdown cranes had all the pipes loaded back onto the trucks and County of Essex was on her way again. Meanwhile at the docks, Solaris had just arrived.

**Solaris:** Have you got more pipes ready for me Kong?

**Kong:** Keep your funnel on Solaris, nearly done!

**River:** Ah, there's something of a breeze coming up me hearties.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Suddenly, Solaris heard the whistling and wailing sound again.

**Solaris:** _(gasps in horror)_ Oh no, it's the flatbeds of fear!

**Kong:** There're no flatbeds of fear, that's just the wind whistling through the pipes!

**Solaris:** Really?

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** As it turned out, Kong was right. As Solaris looked through the pipes, he could hear the wind whistling through them.

**Kong:** You engines!

**Solaris:** River, you said the whistling and wailing was the flatbeds of fear!

**River:** Argh, that I did. But it might've just been the wind.

**Solaris:** You were teasing us all along!

**River:** _(chuckles)_ Well that's the way it is with us dockside diesels.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** That night at Carnforth sheds, County of Essex arrived late.

**County of Essex:** Oh Solaris, you were right, the flatbeds of fear ARE real!

**Solaris:** What do you mean? You're the one who was right, there WAS a sensible explanation.

**County of Essex:** Really? But I heard the sound, and it kept following me and…what explanation?

**Solaris:** It was one of River's tall tales. That noise was just the wind blowing through the pipes.

**County of Essex:** _(blushes with embarrassment)_ Wind…blowing through the pipes? Oh, I, I see. I knew it had to be something. I wasn't really scared.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** But the other engines knew that County of Essex really had been frightened. And after that, no one spoke about the flatbeds of fear again…except, maybe River.

**River:** And to this day, the flatbeds of fear roll the mainline rails looking for an engine to couple up to them. _(chuckles)_

**Korra and Claire:** _(scared)_ Ooh.

**County of Essex:** _(as she, Solaris and Gauge O Guild arrive)_ Oh River, honestly!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** And all the engines laughed, although Korra and Claire really wished that it was just a tall tale.

**And that's episode 106/episode 33 of T&FMLA Series 4 done! Hope you enjoyed my parody of T&F episode **_**'Flatbeds of Fear'**_**. Please review and I request criticism. And on that bombshell, it's time to end, thanks very much for reading, goodnight!**


	34. Finally Back at Work

**Tonight - a legend returns to the series, City of Truro explains about a new diesel character and the Fat Director scolds in a humorous way.**

_**Tornado and Friends Mainline Adventures**_

Hello readers of this not very good and not so popular fanfic series, this' Olton Hall, aka Hogwarts Castle here and you may've noticed by now that we haven't seen much of my old friend Flying Scotsman this series. Well, in an unseen moment, he had to go to the works to replace some worn parts. Well, you should expect that quite a number of times with an engine at an old age like him. Even City of Truro's ordered to rest from time to time when he wants to work. It's only so there's no risk of him breaking down or suffering from worn parts like Flying Scotsman did. But all the same, when they're both working, they're both really useful engines. I wish I could say the same about that diesel engine Flying Scotsman had to help out after he got himself trapped in a tunnel. Which diesel engine am I referring to? Well find out now as I narrate what turned out to be our version of TTTE episode _'Home at Last'_. Enjoy!

**This episode stars:**

**LNER A3 no.4472 **_**'Flying Scotsman'**_** and his driver**

**BR Class 47 Duff Diesel no.47 580 **_**'County of Essex'**_

**GWR 3700 Class no.3440 **_**'City of Truro'**_

**BR Class 50 Hoover Diesel no.50 007 **_**'Hercules'**_** and his driver**

**The Fat Director**

Episode 107: Finally Back at Work

**Flying Scotsman:** _(calls)_ I'M BACK!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** That's right folks, the legend that's Flying Scotsman's back in the series! He has returned from the works after being mended. County of Essex was helping him and his tender off their flatbed trucks. Flying Scotsman didn't remember seeing County of Essex before.

**Flying Scotsman:** _(thinks to himself)_ County of Essex's a kindly sort of diesel engine.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** When Flying Scotsman was unloaded from his flatbed truck and was coupled back up to his tender, County of Essex filled him in.

**County of Essex:** I've been helping to mend worn pieces of track and do odd jobs lately. And I'll tell you now, I hear everyone's looking forward to seeing you again. Now come along, lets get you to the National Railway Museum.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** County of Essex changed tracks and was coupled up to Flying Scotsman. She then took him away en route for the National Railway Museum. Already there parked outside the building was City of Truro having a rest. He wanted to go back to work but the Fat Director told him to stay here for the sake of his parts and health. And speak of the fatso, here he is.

**The Fat Director:** _(furiously)_ I heard that Olton Hall, now shut the fuck up!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** _(giggles)_ Hehehe.

**The Fat Director:** _(growls angrily before turning his attention to City of Truro)_ Anyway, another few hours rest will be best for you City of Truro. Besides, I've got a surprise for you.

**City of Truro:** For me sir, how nice sir, what's it sir?

**The Fat Director:** Wait and see.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** And then he walked away. City of Truro was left wondering what the surprise was. When the surprise arrived, it came as a surprise to him because the surprise was Flying Scotsman who was pushed alongside him by County of Essex who then whirred away once Flying Scotsman was uncoupled.

**City of Truro:** Flying Scotsman?! Oh I'm glad you've come back to work!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Flying Scotsman's fire was soon lit and he was now sizzling happily.

**Flying Scotsman:** I feel all excited, just like a young engine. Now, tell me all the news old buddy.

**City of Truro:** I see you've met County of Essex.

**Flying Scotsman:** Yes, I like that diesel.

**City of Truro:** So do I. It's just a pity Hercules doesn't.

**Flying Scotsman:** Hercules, who's he, the superhero?

**City of Truro:** No not that one, Hercules the Class 50 Hoover diesel who got his name from the battleship HMS Hercules.

**Flying Scotsman:** Oh him, does he know he shares his name with a tank engine from the Dartmouth Steam Railway?

**City of Truro:** He knows but he doesn't give a damn.

**Flying Scotsman:** I probably would've thought so. Is Hercules useful?

**City of Truro:** Well he keeps busy and I'm sure he means well but he's bouncy and rude. He sings and sways and swivels around. His driver calls him 'rock and roll'.

**Flying Scotsman:** _(bravely)_ I understand.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Just then, Flying Scotsman's driver interrupted.

**Flying Scotsman's Driver:** Hercules has done it again, he's stuck in a low tunnel. Come along boy, we've been sent to go and get him out.

**Flying Scotsman:** Very well then sir. So long City of Truro, its been a pleasure talking to you again.

**City of Truro:** Same to you Flying Scotsman, see you later.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** As Flying Scotsman puffed away, he was pleased. He wanted a nice run and was looking forward to meeting Hercules. He found a guards van and some workmen and then hurried along the line, being careful of course for the sake of not wearing out anymore of his parts. As he steamed along, he realised something.

**Flying Scotsman:** _(thoughtfully)_ How nice and smooth the rails are, they've mended all the old bumps. County of Essex must've helped with that as she told me when I first met her earlier this morning. What a difference she has made to the mainline. And I must admit, I did find it rather funny when she told me how she got scared about the 'flatbeds of fear', she was embarrassed but knew I was gonna find out about it soon enough if she never told me.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Flying Scotsman chuckled at the thought of County of Essex being frightened of the flatbeds of fear as he carried on smoothly down the track. Quite soon though, he found Hercules as he saw the guard waving his red flag to stop him. Hercules was stuck at the far end of the low tunnel and he was very cross.

**Hercules:** _(crossly)_ I'm a plain, blunt engine who speaks as he finds! Tunnels should be tunnels and not rabbit holes! This mainline is no good at all!

**Hercules' Driver:** _(snaps)_ Don't be silly you utter blockhead, this tunnel's quite big enough for engines who don't rock and roll!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** The workmen in Flying Scotsman's train made their way to the debris, which consisted of tons of rocks, and started to clear them away. It took some time to clear the rocks away and then set up some supports on the tunnel to set Hercules free again. When everything was eventually finished, Flying Scotsman buffered up to the back of Hercules' train and then pushed him and his coaches safely through. With the engines cleared from the tunnel, Flying Scotsman then brought the train into the nearby siding so the guards van could be uncoupled. The workmen remained at the tunnel to make sure everything was safe. With the guards van uncoupled, Flying Scotsman got back to pushing Hercules up the track. Hercules grumbled all the way home but Flying Scotsman was paying no attention. When evening came, the Fat Director was pleased with Flying Scotsman's work but he spoke severely to Hercules.

**The Fat Director:** _(severely)_ Now you listen to me Hercules! There's nothing wrong with that tunnel! You stuck in it because you tried to do rock and roll! Tunnels aren't dance floors and you're not a pop star!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** The Fat Director wasn't finished yet as he then gave his full attention to Hercules' roof.

**The Fat Director:** _(ominously)_ If it happens again, I shall find ways of cutting you down to size! In other words, your career's, uh…ahem, 'on the line'! Need I say more?!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Hercules was shocked at the Fat Director's words and felt that his boss had said quite enough. Hercules then remained completely silent and still for at least the rest of the week.

**And that's episode 107/episode 34 of T&FMLA Series 4 done! Hope you enjoyed my parody of TTTE episode **_**'Home at Last'**_**. Please review, I request criticism and I apologise if it's a bit short. And on that bombshell, it's time to end, thanks very much for reading, goodnight!**


	35. Assistance to Panther

**Tonight - a Whistler gets known as unreliable, the Fat Director attends to a matter and a B1 gets stuck on an Incline.**

_**Tornado and Friends Mainline Adventures**_

Hello readers of this not very good and not so popular fanfic series, this' Olton Hall, aka Hogwarts Castle here and I for one think it's good that more diesel engines are being brought into the series. I mean, for this episode, we're going to meet a Class 40 Whistler Diesel friend of mine and believe me, for what she is, East Lancashire Railway, aka Panther, has been a very useful addition to the mainline. It's just a shame that when this event happened, Bittern, George Stephenson and even Hercules all thought that Panther was completely useless. Want to know how Panther proved them wrong? Well find out now as I narrate what turned out to be our version of TTTE episode _'Edward the Very Useful Engine'_. Enjoy!

**This episode stars:**

**LNER A4 no.4464 **_**'Bittern'**_** and her driver**

**LNER Peppercorn A1 no.60163 **_**'Tornado'**_

**BR Standard Class 7 Britannia no.70000 **_**'Britannia'**_

**LMS Black 5 no.44767 **_**'George Stephenson'**_

**BR Class 50 Hoover Diesel no.50 007 **_**'Hercules'**_

**BR Class 40 Whistler Diesel no.40 145/D345 **_**'East Lancashire Railway'**_** (for this series, known by her other name **_**'Panther'**_**)**

**GWR Steam Rail Motor no.93 (known as SRM 93)**

**LNER B1 no.61264 (who we named Thompson) and his driver**

**The Fat Director and his Grandson**

**A Signalman**

Episode 108: Assistance to Panther

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** All the engines on the Fat Director's mainline are good at all sorts of things. But if there's one thing you should know about, for the sake of this episode anyway, it's that not only does Fatso use the Class 57 diesels as back engines, he also has the option of Panther the Class 40 Whistler. When engines have heavy loads, Panther would buffer up behind and help push…well, when she doesn't have other jobs to do anyway. However, Panther's old and some of the steam engines, and even a certain diesel engine, think this makes her unreliable.

**Bittern:** _(sniffs)_ Panther's a useless, old, worn out, rectangle faced bitch! She should be retired!

**Tornado:** But she doesn't have tyres.

**Britannia:** 'Retired' Tornado, it means being taken out of service.

**Bittern:** And not a moment too soon!

**George Stephenson:** Too damn right Bittern!

**Hercules:** Yeah, even as a fellow diesel to Panther, I'm with you two on this one! To me, Panther's no use to us mainline fleet anymore!

**Bittern:** _(crossly)_ Besides Tornado, why should I listen to you after you gave up the blue colour to go back to your boring green paint eh?!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** As you can clearly tell, those engines were all in agreement. Tornado however was very upset, even though Panther was a diesel, she was her friend. Oh and she was also upset over what Bittern said to her because Tornado felt that no matter what livery she was wearing, she always thought that she looked very sexy. And the fact that Bittern no longer wants to listen to her because she changed colour, seemingly stating that the A4 thinks she now looks rather ugly, she felt very miserable. Later that morning, Tornado's driver asked her why she was looking so glum. Tornado told him about Panther.

**Tornado:** _(glumly)_ The big engines don't think she's useful anymore.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Early that afternoon, Tornado was working a passenger train. She stopped at a station where the Fat Director was standing on the platform for some unknown reason. But seeing how he was there, Tornado's driver told him about what his engine had said.

**The Fat Director:** Oh really?! Right then, I shall attend to this matter immediately!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** The Fat Director came up with a plan and later that afternoon, he met up with Panther just as she had finished being refuelled.

**The Fat Director:** Panther, I've decided to bring SRM 93 onto the mainline, maybe a different sight for the passengers to see, you know what I mean? Well, I need you to assist and help him with what he needs to do.

**Panther:** Well okay sir but err, I'm supposed to be taking a goods train later. So if I'm looking after SRM 93, who'll take that goods train.

**The Fat Director:** Don't worry, I've arranged for Thompson to be taken off duty at the North Yorkshire Moors Railway and have him take care of your goods train.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Understanding, Panther whirred away to meet SRM 93. Back with the other engines and when the other engines heard that Thompson was going to be helping them, they were pleased.

**George Stephenson:** Thompson's very reliable.

**Bittern:** _(pompously)_ It makes no difference to me because I don't need a back engine.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** And then she wheeshed away with her coaches. Meanwhile, Panther was enjoying working with SRM 93, it was fun showing him around the mainline and helping get used to his new passenger workings.

**SRM 93:** Thanks so much for assisting me Panther. I wish all big diesels were as friendly as you.

**Panther:** _(blushing slightly)_ You're most welcome SRM 93.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** And of course, while Panther was busy with SRM 93, Thompson was taking her scheduled goods train. He wasn't happy though, not because of the job, but because he could hear the trucks playing their silly games.

**Trucks:** _(singing and giggling)_ Thompson should go and play with ducks 'cause he's no good at pulling trucks! Hahaha, hold back, hold back!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Thompson soon found himself starting to climb up the fearsome Lickey Incline. And to add insult to injury, as the trucks held him back, he found himself going slower and slower and slower. When he was about halfway up the Incline, his wheels suddenly stopped altogether. Poor Thompson was stuck.

**Thompson:** _(cries)_ Oh drat, drat and double drat!

**Thompson's Driver:** Oh no, Bittern will be approaching at a fast speed!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** The guard of Thompson's train telephoned the signalman to warn him.

**Signalman:** _(over telephone)_ It's too late to switch Bittern to the other track so you'll have to flag her down!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Realising this, the guard fetched his red flag from the brake van. When Bittern reached the Incline, she saw the guard waving his red flag.

**Bittern:** _(crossly)_ If I stop on this Incline, I'll never get started again!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Bittern decided to just give it a shot anyway, surely she was strong enough to push her coaches and Thompson and his goods train up the Incline. She therefore buffered up to the back of the goods train. Bittern tried to set off again but her wheels just spun and spun.

**Bittern's Driver:** It's no use so we're going to need a back engine. I'll send for Panther.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Bittern was very cross. Panther however was excited when she received the call. How can she not be excited though, I mean, being the back engine for not one but two trains?! That's very exciting in itself. Panther soon arrived on the scene. She cheerfully buffered up and then the strange train set off. They managed to make it up and over the Lickey Incline safely and soon rolled gently into the next station where the Fat Director and his grandson was waiting.

**The Fat Director's Grandson:** _(laughs)_ Look at that! The back engine must be the strongest and the best!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Bittern's cheeks went red with embarrassment as the Fat Director spoke severely to her.

**The Fat Director:** _(severely)_ Bittern, you've said rude things about Panther! She proved today that she's useful, reliable and very helpful!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Bittern felt very ashamed. The next morning when Bittern found Panther, she apologised to her.

**Bittern:** _(puffs apologetically)_ Thank you for helping me yesterday Panther, you really are a useful diesel engine.

**Panther:** _(whirrs happily)_ It's good to be back.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** The Fat Director's plan had worked perfectly. And after yesterdays ordeal, there was never anymore talk about Panther retiring.

**And that's episode 108/35 of T&FMLA Series 4 done! Hope you enjoyed my parody of TTTE episode **_**'Edward the Very Useful Engine'**_**. Please review, I request criticism and I apologise if it's a bit short. And on that bombshell, it's time to end, thanks very much for reading, goodnight!**


	36. An Accidental Favour

**Tonight - a postman doesn't turn up, a B1 makes a pointless cameo and a bike gets destroyed.**

_**Tornado and Friends Mainline Adventures**_

Hello readers of this not very good and not so popular fanfic series, this' Olton Hall, aka Hogwarts Castle here and as you know, the tank engine brothers Swindon and Pannier are in charge of the mainline mail trains. They also have the assistance of Tim Topper the Postman who delivers the mail to places where Swindon and Pannier can't reach. Working together, they always get the mail delivered on time. Thank goodness Harry the Helicopter doesn't help out as much anymore after that accident he had a few episodes ago eh? One day though, Tim Topper lost his van and he had to use a bike to make his deliveries. Pannier wanted to help him out. How did he do so? Well find out now as I narrate what turned out to be our version of TTTE episode _'Mind That Bike'_. Enjoy!

**This episode stars:**

**GWR 5700 Class no.7752/London Transport no.L94 (who we named Pannier) and his driver**

**GWR 5700 Class no.9600 (who we named Swindon)**

**LNER B1 no.61306 **_**'Mayflower'**_

**Tim Topper the Postman**

**A Man**

**Roberto the Bus **_**(mentioned)**_

Episode 109: An Accidental Favour

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** If one morning you were to ride with Roberto the bus, you'd run the winding country road with him, cross over stone board bridges and ride past all his friends on the mainline. Then, you'd hear Roberto's friendly greeting as he sees one of his friends pass by. This friends name's Tim Topper the Postman. Everyday, Tim trundles cheerfully along the Great British mainline. He stops at stations collecting letters and parcels from Swindon and Pannier's mail train. Then, he delivers the mail to farms and cottages all around the country…with the help of his fellow postmen and post women of course but he's the only one who's associated with the mainline. The engines know that wherever their rails won't reach, Tim Topper will collect their post and deliver it safely come rain or shine. He's always ready to load mailbags onto the trains to, and tonight's a prime example as Pannier was having his mailbags loaded with Swindon watching.

**Pannier:** _(whistles)_ Thank you Tim.

**Swindon:** Yes indeed, you're a really useful postman.

**Tim Topper:** Ah, but where would I be without my van? We make a grand pair.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** When all the mailbags were loaded, Pannier steamed happily away while Tim Topper hopped back into his van and drove away. The next morning, Pannier was surprised to find that Tim wasn't on the platform. A postman they didn't know had dumped the mailbags onto the platform and then disappeared.

**Pannier:** _(wonders)_ What happened to Tim?

**Pannier's Driver:** And his old van. No wonder the new postman was cross, I mean, trying to carry mailbags on a bicycle would make anyone miserable.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** The following day, Swindon was resting in a siding as he watched his brother Pannier puffed into the station. The tank engine brothers were pleased to see Tim Topper back again. However, he was looking very sad.

**Tim Topper:** _(sadly)_ The post master decided that my van was too expensive to run and the rounds will take longer on my bike. I'm sorry guys but I can't stop to help you.

**Pannier:** _(sighs)_ I wish I could cheer Tim Topper up.

**Swindon:** _(quietly)_ Yeah, me to bro.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** The brothers were just wondering how this could be done when randomly puffed past them.

**Mayflower:** Hey I'm a pointless cameo that has nothing to do with the story whatsoever bye!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** …Actually I'm not sure if you can call it a cameo if you have a speaking role Mayflower! Anyway, Swindon and Pannier's thoughts were then interrupted again, rudely this time because they heard a man shouting at Tim Topper.

**Man:** _(shouts)_ I've just got off the phone to the Fat Director and he says he needs you to go to his office and sign some important papers right away!

**Tim Topper:** Oh bollocks! This' going to make me later still!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Tim was in a hurry and being careless. He propped his bike against one of Pannier's mail trucks and rushed away.

**Pannier:** _(cries)_ Wait Tim, stop!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Tim was already out of sight thought, meaning he didn't hear Pannier. There was worse to come. Pannier's driver hadn't seen the bike and he started away!

**Pannier:** _(cries)_ Oh no, now there'll be trouble!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** And indeed there was as Pannier's driver opened the regulator making his engine move forward. He suddenly heard a strange sound form behind him.

**Swindon:** _(calls alarmingly)_ What're you doing Pannier's driver, stop my brother, there has been an accident!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Pannier's driver heard Swindon's calls and quickly stopped the train. By now, everyone was running towards them and had now gathered round the station platform to see what the commotion was. They soon found out when they saw the poor state Tim Topper's bike was in, it was in pieces. When Tim Topper returned, he saw his ruined bike and sighed heavily.

**Pannier:** _(apologetically)_ I'm sorry Mr Topper.

**Tim Topper:** Never mind Pannier, it wasn't your fault. But this of course now means I've only got my legs to get the mail delivered. Whatever will happen next?

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** The poor bastard soon found out.

**Tim Topper:** _(shouts angrily)_ I HEARD THAT!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** _(giggles)_ Oh I do love being evil. Anyway, the next day, Tim Topper was waiting for Pannier at the platform with some exciting news. When Pannier arrived, he could see that Tim was looking very happy indeed.

**Pannier:** _(whistles)_ PEEP-PEEP! Is that a smart new van I see Tim?

**Tim Topper:** Yes indeed it is. That accident yesterday did me a good turn Pannier. My chief decided that a new van would do the job. Much better than another bike and worth the expense. And of course, this means I can always be on time again. Now if you'll excuse me Pannier, I've got some mail to deliver.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** And with that, he stepped happily into his new van and drove away, honking 'goodbye' with his horn to Pannier as he went. Pannier was pleased.

**Pannier:** _(beams)_ So I did help…but, by accident as you might say.

**And that's episode 109/episode 36 of T&FMLA Series 4 done! Hope you enjoyed my parody of TTTE episode **_**'Mind That Bike'**_**. Please review, I request criticism and I apologise if it's a bit short. And on that bombshell, it's time to end, thanks very much for reading, goodnight!**


	37. Sea Queen

**Tonight - Prairie's covered in quarry dust, Sir Nigel Gresley's covered in quarry dust and Olton Hall's covered in quarry dust.**

_**Tornado and Friends Mainline Adventures**_

Hello readers of this not very good and not so popular fanfic series, this' Olton Hall, aka Hogwarts Castle here and…well today you've got another episode based on me, back when I was in steam. I pretty much didn't like doing any dirty work, but one day I was tricked into what looked like a dirty job by Sir Nigel Gresley. I showed him though by managing to stay clean on that job. Even when I finished the job still shiny and clean, I received an unexpected surprise from Prairie. What was that surprise exactly? Well find out now as I narrate what turned out to be our version of TTTE episode _'James and the Queen of Sodor'_. Enjoy!

**This episode stars:**

**GWR Hall no.5972 **_**'Olton Hall'**_** (Hogwarts Castle)**

**LNER A4 no.60007 **_**'Sir Nigel Gresley'**_

**GWR 4575 Class no.5521/London Transport no.L150 (who we named Prairie)**

**LNER Peppercorn A1 no.60163 **_**'Tornado'**_

**SR S15 no.(30)825 (who we named Maunsell)**

**GWR Castle no.7029 **_**'Clun Castle'**_

**The Fat Director**

**A Yard Manager**

**LMS Black 5 no.44767 **_**'George Stephenson'**__**(mentioned)**_

Episode 110: Sea Queen

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** All the engines on the Great British mainline want to be the three R's: Responsible, Reliable and Really Useful. They're all at their happiest when the Fat Director gives them very important work to do. I for example was one such engine, especially since I always thought my work was very important indeed…well, my passenger workings at least. I was proud of my smart red paint and I always wanted to look clean and smart. One morning, I was having a wash at the wash down with Sir Nigel Gresley waiting impatiently in line when Prairie puffed in. She had been working at the quarry and she was covered in quarry dust. That wasn't her biggest problem though.

**Prairie:** My whistle's clogged!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** She tried to blow her whistle hard in an attempt to clear it out. Instead though, she only succeeded in blowing quarry dust all over Sir Nigel Gresley.

**Sir Nigel Gresley:** _(huffs)_ Argh, Prairie you silly little prick!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Prairie was now trying not to laugh but I wasn't happy.

**Olton Hall:** Keep your dust away from me Prairie because I'm collecting the mayor today!

**Sir Nigel Gresley:** I should do that.

**Olton Hall:** _(chuckles)_ Oh really?! Well, you'd need a wash down first!

**Sir Nigel Gresley:** _(snorts)_ Pah!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** I just laughed as I puffed away after my wash down was completed. Using the same carriage George Stephenson used for Fatso's mother, it wasn't long before I collected the mayor and was puffing proudly along the track. At one point, I passed Sir Nigel Gresley.

**Olton Hall:** _(whistles boastfully)_ Just look at me SNG!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Sir Nigel Gresley didn't whistle back though.

**Sir Nigel Gresley:** _(huffs)_ Show off.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** That afternoon, the Fat Director was talking to some of the other engines.

**The Fat Director:** I need an engine to collect the Sea Queen.

**Tornado:** Who's the Sea Queen?

**Maunsell:** It's a leaky old barge Tornado.

**The Fat Director:** Maunsell's quite correct. The Sea Queen needs to go to the smelters yard but it's dirty work I'm afraid.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Just then, I shunted in. It was at this precise moment that Sir Nigel Gresley had an idea.

**Sir Nigel Gresley:** Is collecting the Sea Queen important work to do sir?

**The Fat Director:** Very important work to do, now do I have a volunteer?

**Olton Hall:** _(exclaims)_ Very important work, I'll do it!

**The Fat Director:** Then it's settled. She's waiting for you at the yards Olton Hall.

**Olton Hall:** _(excitedly)_ Thank you sir!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** And with that, I whistled excitedly away. Sir Nigel Gresley was delighted because his plan was working. Later, I had arrived at the yards.

**Olton Hall:** _(announces)_ Hello everyone, I'm here to collect the Sea Queen!

**Yard Manager:** There she is Olton Hall!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** I looked and realised that the Sea Queen really was just…

**Olton Hall:** _(furiously)_ That old tub?! SNG tricked me, he wants me to get dirty! I'll show him that a really shiny engine like me never gets dirty!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Still furious, I puffed forward and was coupled up to the Sea Queen. I then preceded to push this old tub to the smelters yard. It was a long journey to the smelters but I was determined to prove my point.

**Olton Hall:** Shiny and clean, shiny and clean!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** However, unbeknownst to me, I was heading straight into trouble. Overhead was a pipe and because the Sea Queen was so tall, I couldn't see it. The tall funnel of the Sea Queen suddenly crashed through the pipe. The funnel was knocked down but sludge was pouring out of the burst pipe. I closed my eyes feeling sure that I'd get covered in that disgusting substance. Fortunately though, I didn't. When the last of the sludge dripped out of the pipe, I was very relieved.

**Olton Hall:** _(declares)_ Shiny and clean, shiny and clean!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** The workmen were called to clear up the sludgy shit. They eventually had it all cleared away and I was then able to continue on my journey. After such a long journey, I eventually arrived at the smelters yard safe and sound and I was pleased that this dirty work was done. And I was also ecstatic that I managed to complete this dirty job without getting dirty myself, so it's not so much a dirty job is it eh?! With the Sea Queen uncoupled, I headed back to the sheds. When I arrived, I was feeling very pleased with myself. I also found that Sir Nigel Gresley was surprised to see that I was still shiny and clean.

**Sir Nigel Gresley:** _(surprised)_ How did you manage to stay so clean?

**Olton Hall:** _(boastfully)_ I HAVE to stay clean, in case there's any important work to do!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Just then, Prairie puffed in after returning form the quarry and she was suffering from the same problem she had when we last heard from her.

**Prairie:** My whistle's clogged again!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Prairie had another attempt at blowing her whistle hard to try and unblock it.

**Prairie:** Watch out Olton Hall!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** It was too late though. Before I knew it, it was now my turn to get covered in quarry dust as it was blown all over my shiny red paint and it briefly sent my eyes into a spin.

**Prairie:** I did warn you.

**Clun Castle:** _(teasingly)_ Hehehe, well it looks like you're going to need a wash down now Olton Hall.

**Olton Hall:** _(snorts)_ Good because it's make me REDDIER then ever, I'm such a splendid engine!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** All the other engines just groaned at what I just said.

**And that's episode 110/episode 37 of T&FMLA Series 4 done! Hope you enjoyed my parody of TTTE episode **_**'James and the Queen of Sodor'**_**. Please review, I request criticism and I apologise if it's a bit short. And on that bombshell, it's time to end, thanks very much for reading, goodnight!**


	38. Sovereign's Failure Teaches Success

**Tonight - two Merchant Navy sisters watch some television, a comedian jokes about a famous kids TV show and we prove that elephants can't fly.**

_**Tornado and Friends Mainline Adventures**_

Hello readers of this not very good and not so popular fanfic series, this' Olton Hall, aka Hogwarts Castle here and if there was an engine who could be considered an even bigger bitch than me, it has to be Sovereign the Black 5. All you readers have seen many cases where she only seems to care about herself and not about anyone else, in fact I don't even think she cared about me when I was in steam. Sovereign's also impatient, and in this episode, you'll find out about her impatience as I narrate what turned out to be our version of TTTE episode _'The Runaway Elephant'_. Enjoy!

**This episode stars:**

**SR Merchant Navy no.35018 **_**'British India Line'**_

**SR Merchant Navy no.35028 **_**'Clan Line'**_

**LMS Black 5 no.44871 **_**'Sovereign'**_** and her driver**

**LMS 8F no.48151 **_**'Gauge O Guild'**_

**BR Class 40 Whistler Diesel no.40 145/D345 **_**'East Lancashire Railway'**_** (for this series, known by her other name **_**'Panther'**_**)**

**Amara the Traction Engine**

**The Fat Director and his wife**

**A Stationmaster**

**SR West Country no.34046 **_**'Braunton'**__**(mentioned)**_

**And Guest Starring:**

**Micky Flanagan the Comedian**

Episode 111: Sovereign's Failure Teaches Success

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** It was a cloudy day in Great Britain but fortunately the weather forecast stated that there wasn't going to be any rain, so it was just an ordinary cloudy day today. At her home of Stewarts Lane Depot, Clan Line was relaxing happily when her sister British India Line reversed into the shed.

**British India Line:** Hi sis.

**Clan Line:** Oh hello British India, what're you doing here?

**British India Line:** Well I don't have any jobs to do at the moment so I just thought I'd pay my sister a visit and see how she's getting on…Hey wait a minute, why are you still here, I thought you were supposed to be pulling your VSOE Pullman specials?

**Clan Line:** Braunton's on VSOE duties today, I'm just undergoing some routine maintenance. Oh and look over there, in the corner of the shed.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** British India Line looked and saw…

**British India Line:** A television? What's that doing there?

**Clan Line:** The workmen wanted to listen to something while they work on me. And I must admit, I'm really enjoying this programme that's on at the moment.

**British India Line:** Oh really, what's that programme?

**Clan Line:** It's called 'Live at the Apollo' and it's where all these comedians come onto a stage and tell all these jokes and gags in front of a live audience. As you can see, the comedian on stage at the moment's a guy named Micky Flanagan, and he has had me in giggles throughout his routine with his jokes and gags, just listen.

**Micky Flanagan:** _(on the TV)_ The thing about having children is it's a little bit tedious. I mean, you get up at about half past 6, or about half 7 if you're running out of ideas. _(audience laughter)_ So the government say 'not too much telly, not too much telly', they don't know what they're talking about. _(audience laughter)_ Loves a bit of telly. _(audience chuckles)_ Never once has my little boy turned to me and gone 'there's nothing on dad'. _(audience laughter)_ So I put him by the telly. He's watching Thomas the Tank Engine and I'm reading about the budget deficit, very high it's gone up, you should be worried about it. _(audience laughter)_ He's watching Thomas, I'm reading the paper, he's watching Thomas, I'm reading the paper, suddenly…I'm watching Thomas. _(audience laughter)_ Two years later, I'm a massive fan of Thomas. _(audience laughter)_ I've got to know the trains again haven't I? Their little personalities you know, you think 'oh, Toby's turned up, this'll be a blinder this will'. _(audience laughter and applause)_ It's like err, he's not a diesel or a steamie, he's square, he plays up a bit, you know. _(audience chuckles)_ You're guaranteed a good episode with Toby. _(audience chuckles)_ Now the worst thing about having children, you're thoroughly enjoying an episode of Thomas, the little boy looks up and thinks 'he's enjoying himself a bit, I'm not having that, I think I'll go off and top me self.' _(audience laughter)_ He goes and gets in the oven. _(audience laughter)_ Keep me on me toes and he'll go 'hot, hot, hot…hot, hot, hot!'. _(audience chuckles)_ And you miss the end of Thomas. _(audience laughter)_ It ruins the rest of your day, ruins it. It nags away at you don't it? And it's not the sort of show that you can just pop down the pub that night and start asking about, you know what I mean? _(audience laughter)_ Saying to people 'don't suppose you saw Thomas this morning did you?'. _(audience laughter)_ They've brought the orchestra over right, to play at the fete, the Sodor fete…they've only sent Percy to pick them up ain't they? _(audience laughter)_ I don't know what the Fat Controller's thinking about sometimes, don't you? _(audience laughter)_ We all know it's a job for Gordon don't we? _(audience chuckles)_ Possibly Henry at a push. _(audience laughter)_

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Alright, that's enough of that, now lets get back to the actual plot shall we?! Anyway, all the engines on the Great British mainline were excited because a new park was being built. All the engines were working hard, helping out with the building work, and they were all determined to get the job done on time. One engine helping out with the building of the park, Sovereign, was feeling impatient, like here for example as she wheeshed past Panther.

**Sovereign:** _(puffs crossly)_ Get a move on slowcoach!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Panther just ignored Sovereign. Later on, Sovereign came across Gauge O Guild waiting for her to puff past.

**Sovereign:** _(boastfully)_ You're so slow, I'll finish first!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Gauge O Guild was cross upon hearing that. A little later, he met up with Panther at the station nearest to the park.

**Gauge O Guild:** _(steams)_ Sovereign thinks she's fast but she's just a bossy boiler!

**Panther:** _(in agreement)_ Better safe than fast.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Meanwhile, Sovereign drew into the station where her trucks of sleight were needed. She was feeling puffed up and pleased with herself.

**Sovereign:** _(wheeshes proudly)_ I finished first!

**The Fat Director:** In that case Sovereign, I've got another job for you. I need you to collect the elephant on the siding and take it to the park.

**Sovereign:** _(chuffs)_ Yes sir!

**The Fat Director:** This elephant's very important, therefore you must be very careful with it.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Sovereign understood her orders and chuffed away to collect the elephant. When she arrived at the siding, she saw the elephant and was surprised by the look of it.

**Sovereign:** Why, it's only a statue. This' an easy job.

**Stationmaster:** You must wait for the brake van Sovereign because this statue's very heavy.

**Sovereign:** _(puffs to her driver)_ Pah, what a load of nonsense, I've pushed heavier loads than this plenty of times!

**Sovereign's Driver:** Lets go Sovereign but we must be careful.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** So they puffed away, but without the brake van. To make matters worse, once Sovereign reached open track, she had completely forgotten about being careful, and she was being impatient again.

**Sovereign:** _(whistles)_ We'll show them just how fast I can go! We'll deliver this statue and I'll still finish first!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Before long, Sovereign started to speed up. Soon, she was going as fast as her wheels could carry her. Her driver was starting to worry so he tried to brake. However, Sovereign was now completely out of control and she was scared because she had never gone this fast before. As Sovereign raced towards a crossing, people waved and cheered and cars honked their horns as Sovereign sped through. Suddenly, she was approaching another crossing that Amara the Traction Engine was slowly crossing with a cart. Amara looked over and saw Sovereign approaching at a very high speed.

**Amara:** _(cries)_ Holy shit!

**Sovereign's Driver:** _(shouts)_ Look out!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Fortunately though, Amara made it over the crossing just in time as Sovereign zipped through helplessly. Sovereign later rounded a bend and came across Panther up ahead on the adjacent track.

**Panther:** _(calls)_ Slow down Sovereign!

**Sovereign:** _(cries)_ I CAN'T!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Sovereign shot past Panther and was still out of control. The new park was now looming ahead. Sovereign's driver applied the brakes. But it was too late. With a hard bash against the station siding buffers, the statue was launched off its flatbed truck, flown through the air and eventually landed standing up in the lake. Luckily, no one was hurt, even though Sovereign had fallen onto her side in the accident, and I'm getting so bloody sick and tired of saying these same goddamn catchphrases over and fucking over again! Anyway, by the time the Fat Director arrived on the scene, Sovereign was on the flatbed truck and her tender was on another one that had been brought onto the scene.

**The Fat Director:** _(sternly)_ I told you to be careful, you should've waited for the brake van!

**Sovereign:** _(mumbles)_ I'm sorry sir.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Poor Sovereign was feeling very embarrassed. A few days later, Sovereign was mended and was able to attend the grand opening of the new park. However, when she arrived, she was very surprised to find that the elephant statue was still standing in the lake.

**Sovereign:** What the…why's the elephant statue still in the lake, I would've thought you'd get it out by now?

**Mrs Walkers:** Everyone's loving the elephant in the lake Sovereign.

**The Fat Director:** Even if it was a mistake.

**Engines:** _(cheers)_ Hooray for Sovereign's mistake!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Sovereign blushed and went a deep shade of red.

**And that's episode 111/episode 38 of T&FMLA Series 4 done! Hope you enjoyed my parody of TTTE episode **_**'The Runaway Elephant'**_**. Please review and I request criticism. And on that bombshell, it's time to end, thanks very much for reading, goodnight!**


	39. Christmas Pudding

**Tonight - a steam engine gets referred to as unreliable, a lorry has an accident and a tractor gets left behind.**

_**Tornado and Friends Mainline Adventures**_

Hello readers of this not very good and not so popular fanfic series, this' Olton Hall, aka Hogwarts Castle here and as you probably would guess, all us engines really don't like wearing our snowplows because they're just so uncomfortable and they make our buffers ache! However, one winters day close to Christmas, snowplows weren't the only thing the main engine of this series Tornado was complaining about. She really didn't like it when Eliza the Vintage Lorry said that she wasn't as reliable as her. However, after an accident, Tornado had the best chance to show Eliza that she really was reliable after all. How did she do so? Well find out now as I narrate what turned out to be our version of TTTE episode _'Not So Hasty Puddings'_. Enjoy!

**This episode stars:**

**LNER Peppercorn A1 no.60163 **_**'Tornado'**_

**Eliza the Vintage Lorry and her driver**

**Michelle the Tractor**

**The Fat Director**

**A Dock Manager**

Episode 112: Christmas Pudding

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** It was Christmas time in Great Britain and all the Fat Director's engines were very busy. The falling snow was making their journeys difficult, meaning they had to work hard to deliver passengers and goods to their destinations on time. And by doing so, it made the engines feel very reliable indeed. One snowy day, Eliza the Vintage Lorry arrived at the fitters yard with Tornado's snowplow. Tornado wasn't pleased to see her snowplow.

**Tornado:** _(huffs)_ Oh great, I don't need that stupid old thing Eliza.

**Eliza:** _(steams)_ Stuff and nonsense Tornado! You can't be a very reliable engine if you can't get through the snow!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Those words from Eliza made Tornado very cross indeed.

**Tornado:** _(crossly)_ You know I'm reliable! I just don't like my snowplow!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Later on, Tornado was wearing her snowplow and was now hauling a passenger train along the mainline. She was still displeased though.

**Tornado:** _(chuffs angrily)_ Eliza's rude and this snowplow makes my buffers ache!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** And that's not the first time we've heard that isn't it? Tornado carried on though nonetheless. She soon steamed up to a level crossing where she could see the Fat Director talking to Eliza.

**The Fat Director:** The pudding factory that associates with the mainline has been snowed in Eliza. Their Christmas puddings must get to the docks before the ship sails away.

**Tornado:** Let me do the job sir!

**The Fat Director:** I need you on passenger duties. Besides, Eliza knows those roads well and she's very reliable.

**Tornado:** _(huffs)_ I'm reliable too!

**Eliza:** _(chuffs)_ Apparently, not reliable enough.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** And then Eliza rolled away. Tornado was now even crosser than before, the poor young bitch.

**Tornado:** _(furiously)_ I HEARD THAT!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** _(giggles)_ Hehehe, sorry. Anyway, the snow was heavy but Tornado arrived at every station on her journey right on time. With every station she stopped at, she was slowly but surely cheering up a bit. Meanwhile, Eliza was struggling to stay on the road. Her wheels really weren't liking the slippery, icy roads one bit. Back with Tornado now and she had just arrived at the docks to pick up Michelle the Tractor. Upon arrival, she was surprised to find that Eliza was yet to return.

**Dock Manager:** The ship will miss the tide!

**The Fat Director:** And all those children abroad won't be getting their Christmas puddings. Tornado, go and look for Eliza at once!

**Tornado:** Yes sir. _(puffs away with Michelle in tow)_ Perhaps Eliza isn't so reliable after all.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Speaking of Eliza, she had now arrived at the pudding factory and had just finished being loaded with crates containing all the Christmas puddings.

**Eliza:** The Fat Director's counting on me so I mustn't be late.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Eliza then trundled away en route for the docks. She chuffed along the icy roads. Again, her wheels weren't enjoying the state the road was currently in but she was doing her best to be careful, especially as she was now carrying Christmas puddings. Then there was trouble. Up ahead, Eliza could see that she was approaching a downward slope, which must've meant that she was at the top of some sort of hill. As she started to go down the hill, she suddenly found herself starting to speed up. Her driver applied the brakes but Eliza slipped and skidded out of control and couldn't prevent herself from crashing into a deep snowdrift. Poor Eliza was stuck. Meanwhile, Tornado was puffing through the swirling snow with Michelle on the flatbed truck behind her.

**Michelle:** Tornado, can you see Eliza?

**Tornado:** No, can you?

**Michelle:** I'm afraid not and it's all because of this goddamn snow!

**Tornado:** _(crossly)_ Just goes to show why I hate snow so much, it causes nothing but trouble!

**Michelle:** Yeah, even I'm not that keen on snow to be honest.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Just then, they spotted Eliza's driver standing on the track waving a red flag to stop them.

**Eliza's Driver:** Eliza's stuck in the snow, I need help to dig her out.

**Michelle:** _(confidently)_ You can rely on me sir, I'll soon have her out of there.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Michelle was unloaded from her flatbed truck and using some rope that was provided from an unknown source, Michelle, pulling hard, managed to clear Eliza from her snowy grave.

**Tornado:** We'll have to hurry. It wasn't your fault Eliza, it was the slippery roads that caused your accident.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Eliza probably would've guessed that but she still smiled and was feeling much better. Before long, she was loaded onto Tornado's flatbed truck and fortunately, the Christmas puddings in the crates weren't at all damaged in the accident. With Eliza in tow, Tornado chuffed and puffed as fast as she could, she had to get to the docks before the ship departed.

**Michelle:** _(shouts)_ Hey, what about me?!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Anyway…Tornado was charging her way through the swirling snow. She arrived at the docks just in time, much to the waiting Fat Director's relief. The Fat Director was delighted to see the crates and that Eliza was safe and well.

**The Fat Director:** We'll get you unloaded immediately.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** So that's exactly what they did and before long, all the crates of Christmas puddings were loaded onto the ship.

**Tornado:** Now all those children out there all across the world can have their Christmas puddings.

**The Fat Director:** Well done Tornado.

**Eliza:** Oh thank you Tornado. You and I are both reliable.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Tornado smiled in agreement.

**And that's episode 112/episode 39 of T&FMLA Series 4 done! Hope you enjoyed my parody of TTTE episode **_**'Not So Hasty Puddings'**_**. Please review, I request criticism and I apologise if it's a bit short. And on that bombshell, it's time to end, thanks very much for reading, goodnight!**


	40. Mayflower and the Boulder

**Tonight - three LNER engines meet up, The Green Knight brings in some new machinery and…BOULDERS HAVE FACES?!**

_**Tornado and Friends Mainline Adventures**_

Hello readers of this not very good and not so popular fanfic series, this' Olton Hall, aka Hogwarts Castle here and you know something, I distinctly remember when plans were brought up to build a new quarry in the mountainous parts of the mainline. However, it was disturbing the peace of a mysterious boulder. Eventually, the boulder had had enough. What did it do? Well find out now as I narrate what turned out to be our version of TTTE episode _'Rusty and the Boulder'_. Enjoy!

**This episode stars:**

**LNER B1 no.61306 **_**'Mayflower'**_** and her driver**

**LNER K4 no.61994 **_**'The Great Marquess'**_

**LNER K1 no.62005 **_**'Lord of the Isles'**_

**BR Standard Class 4 4-6-0 no.75029 **_**'The Green Knight'**_

**LMS Black 5 no.45407 **_**Lancashire Fusilier'**_

**GWR Castle no.5043 **_**'Earl of Mount Edgcumbe'**_** and his driver**

**The Fat Director**

Episode 113: Mayflower and the Boulder

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** On the Great British mainline, high up in the mountainous parts of the line was a mysterious boulder which had stood alone for a very long time. One day however, workmen arrived to build a quarry on the line below. Helping out with the job was Mayflower as she brought some trucks to an old shed where she met up with The Great Marquess and Lord of the Isles.

**Mayflower:** Hello there boys.

**The Great Marquess:** Hi Mayflower. I say, where's all this rock coming from?

**Mayflower:** Why it's from the new quarry of course Great Marquess. This mountain rock's good for many things, although it's dangerous up there.

**Lord of the Isles:** Oh really, why's that?

**Mayflower:** _(nervously)_ Well it's because of that big boulder. I think it's watching me.

**The Great Marquess:** Oh don't be silly Mayflower! How can some boulder be watching you, I mean it doesn't have any eyes!

**Mayflower:** That may indeed be correct Great Marquess, but there's something strange about this one.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Just then, The Green Knight arrived. He was delivering a new piece of machinery for the quarry.

**Mayflower:** What's that Green Knight?

**The Green Knight:** Well apparently Mayflower, this new quarry machine will help collect the rock faster by using its arms.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** The new quarry machine was unloaded from its flatbed truck and was sent straight to work. Soon, the new quarry machine was working hard and all the workmen were pleased. However, not one of them was bothering to check on the boulder as little snippets of rock began to fall to the ground...those lousy bastards! Anyway, later that afternoon, it started to rain so the workmen covered their machines with tarpaulin and went away. Mayflower gazed up and shivered, above stood boulder. Suddenly, a large slab of rock landed onto the rails much to Mayflower's shock. Her driver was concerned.

**Mayflower's Driver:** We had best leave 'til the weather's better Mayflower because the rain might loosen some of this rock.

**Mayflower:** _(whispers)_ I think it's Boulder wanting us to go away.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** So Mayflower puffed away for home. Unbeknownst to her though, Boulder was indeed watching her and he wasn't happy, but rather sad. The next day came and the sun was shining. The quarry was filled with more machines now. Suddenly, as Mayflower was resting, she noticed something from above her.

**Mayflower:** What the heck? Hey, Boulder's moving!

**Mayflower's Driver:** Don't be so daft Mayflower, it can't.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** But it could and it did. It rolled off its perch and thumped onto the ground right in front of Mayflower. Then there was more trouble as it started to roll forward.

**Mayflower:** _(cries)_ It's rolling along our line!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Mayflower was reversing as fast as she could to get away from Boulder. She switched onto a different track over a set of points.

**Mayflower's Driver:** Right then Mayflower, we'll stop here until Boulder passes by.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** However, Boulder was nowhere to be seen. Suddenly, they heard something from behind them.

**Mayflower's Driver:** _(cries)_ Holy shit, it's behind us!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Mayflower quickly raced away with Boulder in hot pursuit. Further up the line, they saw a small junction where one line went uphill. Mayflower went onto that track and Boulder thundered past and rolled down the other track. Meanwhile, Lancashire Fusilier was making his way up to the quarry. Then, he gasped as he saw Boulder.

**Lancashire Fusilier:** _(cries)_ YIKES!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Lancashire Fusilier reversed away quickly as Boulder gave chase. Boulder was catching up to him fast but he managed to veer into a siding. As Boulder raced past, it smashed through an old water tower which quite literally destroyed it. A relieved Lancashire Fusilier then saw Mayflower approaching.

**Lancashire Fusilier:** _(shouts)_ We must warn the yards!

**Mayflower:** _(calls)_ Yes, but how?!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** As they discussed that, Boulder was unstoppably rolling onwards. Further down the line was Earl of Mount Edgcumbe.

**Earl of Mount Edgcumbe:** Huh, that's weird, why would my drivers horoscope tell him that today we were going to be attacked by a boulder? _(Boulder comes into view)_ Hmm, probably coincide-ooh. Ooh…that's why.

**Earl of Mount Edgcumbe's Driver:** Do you wanna scream and run like there's no tomorrow?

**Earl of Mount Edgcumbe:** After you. _(reverses away from chasing Boulder)_ AHH, OH MY GOD, SOMEBODY, HELP ME, I'M GONNA BE CRUSHED TO DEATH, AHH I WANT MY MOMMY! _(coughs to clear his throat and veers into a siding)_ Hahaha, how do you like me now sucker! _(crashes into rocks at the end of the siding) _Ow, oh, oh dang, I spoke too soon!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Boulder carried on rolling along as the dust cleared.

**Earl of Mount Edgcumbe's Driver:** _(sighs)_ Well, rather a smash than a squash.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Meanwhile, outside the old shed, The Great Marquess was collecting trucks. But then, he heard Boulder and then saw it approaching.

**The Great Marquess:** _(cries)_ Oh no, it's heading straight for me!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Actually though, Boulder was heading straight for the old shed alongside The Great Marquess. The Great Marquess gasped and closed his eyes, awaiting the sound of a loud crash. And that's exactly what he got as with a loud CRASH and explosion, Boulder destroyed the old shed. The alarm was raised quickly after the accident. When the Fat Director arrived and inspected the damage, he decided to close down further developments on the new quarry. Then, he looked at Boulder.

**The Fat Director:** _(thoughtfully)_ We should've left this part of the mainline alone.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** As a result of all this, Boulder was moved to a hill close by the yards. Mayflower's sure that on a clear night it's gazing up at the mountain top and that it sighs at being carried on the wind to where it once used to stand proud and silent. I wonder if Mayflower's right, don't you?

**And that's episode 113/episode 40 of T&FMLA Series 4 done! Hope you enjoyed my parody of TTTE episode **_**'Rusty and the Boulder'**_**. Please review, I request criticism and I apologise if it's a bit short. And on that bombshell, it's time to end, thanks very much for reading, goodnight!**


	41. Eventful Episodes on the NYMR

**Tonight - an S15 is constantly moaning, some diesels come to his aid and a Q6 gets tilted.**

_**Tornado and Friends Mainline Adventures**_

Hello readers of this not very good and not so popular fanfic series, this' Olton Hall, aka Hogwarts Castle here and for today, this episode's a special episode because it's not actually set on the mainline. For today, we're paying a visit to my friends on the North Yorkshire Moors Railway, a railway that has a firm connection to the mainline at Whitby station at one end of the railway and also at Grosmont where the railway initially ends, but certain trains can carry onward to Whitby. On this occasion though, Greene King was acting like a total twerp which resulted in the railways coaches loosing trust in him. So Raven had to help out. However, she was suffering from weak springs. How did she get on? Well find out now as I narrate what turned out to be our combination of TTTE episodes _'Four Little Engines'_ and _'A Bad Day for Sir Handel'_. Enjoy!

**This episode stars:**

**LMS Princess Coronation no.46233 **_**'Duchess of Sutherland'**_

**LNER Q6 no.63395 (who we named Raven) and her driver**

**SR S15 no.(30)841 **_**'Greene King'**_** and his driver**

**SR West Country no.34101 **_**'Hartland'**_

**LMS Black 5 no.44806 **_**'Kenneth Aldcroft'**_

**LH&JC Lambton Collieries 0-6-2T no.29 (who we named Peggy)**

**BR Class 25 Rat Diesel no.D7628 **_**'Sybilla'**_

**BR Class 31 Ped Diesel no.31 128 **_**'Charybdis'**_

**BR Class 37 Syphon Diesel no.37 264 (who we named Syphon)**

**BR Standard Class 4 2-6-4T no.80135 (who we named Daniel)**

**BR Standard Class 7 Britannia no.70013 **_**'Oliver Cromwell'**_

**Some Coaches**

**The NYMR Boss**

**A Workman**

**LMS Black 5 no.45428 **_**'Eric Treacy'**__**(mentioned)**_

**The Fat Director **_**(mentioned)**_

Episode 114: Eventful Episodes on the NYMR

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** It was another typically sunny day in Great Britain and while all the engines on the mainline were hard at work, as were all the engines on the North Yorkshire Moors Railway. Early that morning, the Fat Director had sent Duchess of Sutherland to the works to be mended. The quickest way to get to the works was to ride along the Esk Valley Line. As Duchess of Sutherland approached Grosmont Station, she spotted Raven on the NYMR part of the station.

**Duchess of Sutherland:** _(in thoughts)_ It's Raven, what's she doing here? Last thing we heard about her was that she was away visiting another railway.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Raven was pleased to see the Duchess.

**Raven:** _(sighs)_ I've just brought the first early morning train of the day here and now I'm having a rest here before I start off on my return journey back to Pickering. And I must say I'm happy to be back working after returning from being mended.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Just then, some workmen arrived.

**Workman:** We're going to take you to the works now Duchess, come along.

**Princess Elizabeth:** Farewell Raven, the NYMR is a lovely railway.

**Raven:** _(smiles)_ Oh it is, it is! You've made me smile Duchess, goodbye!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** And with a cheerful toot of her whistle, Duchess of Sutherland puffed away with the workmen. As she left, Raven was alone. But she was now lost in her thoughts. Even though Duchess of Sutherland had initially made her smile, she was feeling rather worried deep down. It was during her visit on the other railway that started these worries because she wasn't exactly feeling 100% and she was suspecting that the problem was her springs. Meanwhile, at the engine sheds, the other engines were just waking up. However, Greene King was in a bad mood for waking up early. Just then, his driver walked up to him.

**Greene King's Driver:** Now then Greene King, lets get you ready for work shall we?

**Greene King:** _(crossly)_ I'm tired for waking up too early! Why don't you let Hartland do it, she'd love it!

**Greene King's Driver:** No, you're first.

**Hartland:** Besides Greene King, as much as I love to help out, I've got my own passenger train to haul later today so I suggest you get going before you cause any, dare I say it, confusion and delay.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Greene King let out a cross and heavy sigh before steaming out of the shed. After taking on coal and water, he reversed into Pickering station and was coupled up to his coaches. He then spotted Kenneth Aldcroft taking on water.

**Greene King:** _(crossly)_ Why's it YOU who gets to go on the mainline after your next overhaul Kenneth Aldcroft. Surely it has enough Black 5's as it as! Besides, your brother and our own Eric Treacy already works there along with seven of your siblings!

**Kenneth Aldcroft:** Oh stop moaning Greene King you jealous berk!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Just then, Peggy puffed in pushing and shunting Kenneth Aldcroft's coaches into the station.

**Peggy:** _(angrily)_ I do wish you'd shut the fuck up Greene King! I mean, whining, bitching and moaning isn't going to get you anywhere is it?!

**Kenneth Aldcroft:** Yeah!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Greene King said nothing but he was seething inside. Just then, the guard blew his whistle and Greene King puffed furiously away. All through the journey, Greene King didn't say a single word as he puffed furiously along the line. By the time he reached Grosmont, he was still fuming.

**Greene King's Driver:** Alright Greene King, once we haul this train back to Pickering, we've got to pick up some trucks and take them up and down the line for the benefit of photographers.

**Greene King:** _(snorts furiously)_ Trucks, trucks?! I won't so there!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** He was uncoupled from the coaches and preceded to run round them. However, he was about to cause a great deal of trouble. Just as he started reversing on the other track, he suddenly derailed.

**Greene King:** Told you.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Once news reached the NMR Boss that Greene King had derailed, he sent Sybilla to pick him and some workmen up and take them to the scene. They soon arrived and by this time, Greene King was beginning to feel rather silly. Sybilla was quick to notice this and she couldn't prevent herself from smirking.

**Sybilla:** _(smirks)_ I can tell by that look on your face that you're instantly regretting your behaviour aren't you Greene King?

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Greene King said nothing. The next heard words came from the NYMR Boss and his message to Greene King was brief and blunt.

**The NYMR Boss:** I shall talk to you later!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Then, he departed the scene with Sybilla, leaving the workmen to start getting Greene King back onto the rails. Greene King was now feeling sillier still.

**Greene King's Driver:** Alright, come on then, lets get you back on the rails.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Just as the workmen started to do so, Charybdis arrived to collect Greene King's coaches and he was feeling rather amused about the whole ordeal?

**Charybdis:** How do you feel now Greene King? Oh well, lets just hope that all this makes you a better engine eh?

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** And with that, Charybdis rumbled away. That evening, Greene King was the first to return to the sheds. When he arrived however, the NYMR Boss was also there waiting angrily for him.

**The NYMR Boss:** _(angrily)_ You're a very naughty engine! I hope I can trust you to behave when you next come out of this shed!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** And after hearing that, everyone on the NYMR was quite sure that Greene King would behave. And he was indeed trying when he was finally allowed to return to work. However, as he was puffing along the line, the coaches he was hauling had lost trust in him, no matter how much Greene King was trying to be kind to them, so they were awkward and rude to him. Out on some open track, there was trouble up ahead. A careless and lost flock of sheep had strayed onto the line. Greene King applied his brakes and stopped, he was thankful that he hadn't struck any of the sheep. The coaches though were cross.

**Coaches:** _(screams)_ He just bumped us! Lets pay him out!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** They then surged into Greene King's tender and pushed it and Greene King himself off the rails. Nobody was hurt but once Greene King was back on the rails, he limped sadly back to the shed. Raven was also there.

**Greene King's Driver:** No more work for you today. Now who's going to make the connection with the mainline at Whitby with the days last train from Pickering?

**Raven:** What about me sir, I can do it if you like?!

**Greene King's Driver:** Raven? Are you sure you can manage with your weak springs?

**Raven:** I'll try!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** With Greene King shunted into the shed, Raven had her firebox started. Soon, the fire was in her belly and she was ready. She steamed away to Pickering where the coaches were standing after Peggy had shunted them into position.

**Peggy:** There're your coaches Greene…oh, it's you Raven. Why's it you instead of Greene King hauling this train?

**Raven:** Oh didn't you hear Peggy? Greene King had a little accident earlier so I'm taking this train at the way to Whitby instead of him.

**Peggy:** Are you sure you'll be able to manage with your weak springs? You really should get them mended you know.

**Raven:** Oh don't you worry about me, just get ready to take away Syphon's coaches once he arrives. Of course, I can't go until he gets here.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Once Peggy puffed away, Raven then preceded to scold the coaches for what happened with Greene King earlier.

**Raven:** _(scolds crossly)_ I'm ashamed of you coaches! By surging into Greene King like that, you might've hurt your passengers!

**Coaches:** _(quivers)_ We're sorry Raven.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Just then, they heard a rumbling noise as Syphon approached the station. He sounded his horn when he saw Raven. He entered the station and spoke to Raven.

**Syphon:** I heard about the change so I wish you best of luck Raven!

**Raven:** Thanks Syphon!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** The guard then blew his whistle and waved his flag. Raven whistled back and steamed away, the journey was underway. Raven knew all the station on the NYMR and was sure to stop at every single one of them to let the passengers get on and off the train. The sun was shining and the rails were dry.

**Raven:** _(sighs happily)_ This' just so lovely.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Presently, Raven noticed that it seemed more and more passengers were getting on the train at every station she stopped at, making it heavier and heavier. It was now time for the final leg of the journey, departing from Grosmont and heading all the way to Whitby. As the passengers got onboard, Raven was starting to worry.

**Raven:** _(in thoughts)_ I don't think I've ever pulled a passenger train this heavy before, just how many passengers are in those coaches for god sake?!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Daniel was in the station siding and he saw Raven's worried expression.

**Daniel:** _(assuring)_ You'll be fine Raven, you're one of the finest engines on the NYMR, there's nothing you can't do.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Raven blushed at Daniel's kind words. Then, they heard the guards whistle. Raven gulped, this was it.

**Raven:** Well, here we go.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** With a wheesh of steam, Raven began to pull. She got off to a wheel slipping start but managed to get the train going. As the final leg went on, Raven was starting to tire more and she was loosing steam.

**Raven's Driver:** Take your time Raven, you're on schedule so there's no rush.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** This didn't make Raven feel any better though. Her springs were weak and the rail joints were jarring her wheels. Suddenly, there was a loud noise as a spring gave way. This left Raven tilted to her left side. She had to stop.

**Raven:** _(cries)_ I feel all crooked!

**Raven's Driver:** It looks like we're going to need a bus now for our passengers.

**Raven:** _(pleas)_ No, don't do that! I'll get to Whitby or burst!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** So they decided to carry on, even though the driver and fireman found it tough going since Raven was now puffing and chuffing at a strange angle. Up at Whitby, Oliver Cromwell was standing and waiting at the platform side that left along the mainline. Just then, he heard a strange noise. Clanging and clanking, Raven steamed in.

**Raven:** I'll do it, I'll do it! _(stops at the station)_ I've done it!

**Oliver Cromwell:** Well done Raven, although I must admit I've never seen engines run at that angle before.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** With all of Raven's passengers onboard Oliver Cromwell's train, Ollie puffed away. With him gone, everyone was very pleased with Raven, although she was still worried.

**Raven:** _(worried)_ I suppose that was my last journey, now that my spring's gone I suspect that I'm now going to be sent for scrap, I can't run as well as I used to.

**Raven's Driver:** _(proudly)_ You still can run as you used to once you're mended Rae, and that's exactly what's going to happen to you because you deserve it.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Raven smiled with delight.

**And that's episode 114/episode 41 of T&FMLA Series 4 done! Hope you enjoyed my combination parody of TTTE episodes **_**'Four Little Engines'**_** and **_**'A Bad Day for Sir Handel'**_**. Please review and I request criticism. And on that bombshell, it's time to end, thanks very much for reading, goodnight!**


	42. A Very Special Letter

**Tonight - Princess Elizabeth gets confused, a returning character's groaning and some other returning characters are welcoming.**

_**Tornado and Friends Mainline Adventures**_

Hello readers of this not very good and not so popular fanfic series, this' Olton Hall, aka Hogwarts Castle here and on one occasion, all my friends, and brother, who were based at Tyseley had the chance to take a trip to the National Railway Museum in York. It was a shame that Swindon almost let the side down after an accident but thankfully he was able to make it. But what was the reason for attending the Museum in the first place? Well find out now as I narrate what turned out to be our version of TTTE episode _'Thomas and the Special Letter'_. Enjoy!

**This episode stars:**

**GWR 5700 Class no.7752/London Transport no.L94 (who we named Pannier)**

**GWR 5700 Class no.9600 (who we named Swindon) and his driver**

**LMS Princess Royal no.46201 **_**'Princess Elizabeth'**_

**GWR Hall no.4965 **_**'Rood Ashton Hall'**_

**GWR Castle no.7029 **_**'Clun Castle'**_

**GWR Castle no.5043 **_**'Earl of Mount Edgcumbe'**_

**LMS Jubilee no.45593 **_**'Kolhapur'**_

**LNER A4 no.4468 **_**'Mallard'**_

**LMS Princess Coronation no.46229 **_**'Duchess of Hamilton'**_

**GWR King no.6000 **_**'King George V'**_

**BR Standard 9F no.92220 **_**'Evening Star'**_

**The Fat Director**

**Roberto the Bus **_**(mentioned)**_

Episode 115: A Very Special Letter

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** One calm evening, Swindon puffed into Tyseley station. His brother Pannier and Princess Elizabeth were already there.

**Pannier:** Hello bro, are you on your way back home to the Loco Works over there?

**Swindon:** Yes I am indeed now that all my jobs for the day are done.

**Pannier:** Good because I was about to head there myself.

**Swindon:** You know, my instincts tell me that something's up.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Princess Elizabeth looked up at the sky.

**Princess Elizabeth:** Where?

**Swindon:** _(laughs)_ Not up there silly, down here.

**Princess Elizabeth:** _(confused)_ Your Princess's confused. How can something be up when it's down?

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Swindon was too excited to explain. Just then, he spotted something.

**Swindon:** Bust my buffers, look over there!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Pannier and Rood Ashton Hall looked over to where Swindon was looking. What they could see was my brother Rood Ashton Hall, Clun Castle and her brother Earl of Mount Edgcumbe parading towards them.

**Rood Ashton Hall:** Good evening you three, aren't we all a fine sight?

**Princess Elizabeth:** We agree that thou looks very splendid indeed.

**Clun Castle:** Sorry we can't stop, the Fat Director wants to meet up with his Tyseley based engines at the Loco Works!

**Earl of Mount Edgcumbe:** Yeah, he said he had some sort of plan or something!

**Pannier:** A plan of some sorts eh?

**Princess Elizabeth:** Well what're we waiting for? Let us follow them and find out what's going to happen!

**Swindon:** Alright then, lets go.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** So Swindon, Pannier and Princess Elizabeth followed the other engines to Tyseley Locomotive Works. When they were all there, they were gathered round the turntable. Even a watching Kolhapur was wondering what the hey was going on?

**Kolhapur:** Why've you all been gathered round the turntable when you should all be in the shed getting some rest and some sleep?

**Clun Castle:** The Fat Director told us that he wanted to talk to his Tyseley based engines about something.

**Rood Ashton Hall:** And we don't know what?

**Earl of Mount Edgcumbe:** _(boastfully)_ I bet it's so he can tell all of you that I'm the most splendid looking Tyseley based engine of all of us here.

**Princess Elizabeth:** _(angrily)_ Would thou be silenced!

**Pannier:** Yeah Earl, especially since I can see the Fat Director walking towards us now!

**Swindon:** And he seems to be holding a piece of paper.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Swindon was right, there was indeed a piece of paper being held in the Fat Director's right hand as he walked towards the engines. Once he was standing on a podium which was placed on the turntable after the engines arrived, he cleared his throat and spoke.

**The Fat Director:** Alright listen up you lot, what I have here's an important letter I need to read to you. It comes from a little girl who's five years old and from Tyseley. It reads…

'_Dear all the Tyseley steam engines, please can I meet you? All my friends are also from Tyseley and they'd all like to meet you to. You could come to my house for tea but my mummy says there aren't any railway tracks to my house. How about we meet up at the National Railway Museum in York instead and make it a very special occasion? Thank you very much.'_

**The Fat Director:** It seems that there're many girls and boys who want to meet you lot. Therefore, it has been agreed that you lot can all travel to the National Railway Museum in two days to attend a get together party for the little girl and her friends.

**Engines minus Kolhapur:** _(whistling delightfully)_ Hooray, hooray!

**The Fat Director:** _(calls)_ QUIET! _(all the engines go silent)_ That's better. Now then, all your jobs leading up 'til that day will be normal so just focus on getting those done for the time being. Oh and Kolhapur, don't worry, we promise to get your restoration, overhaul or whatever it is started as soon as we possibly can.

**Kolhapur:** _(groans)_ Well just hurry up will ya?! I've been bored out of my fucking skull just sitting here for seemingly all eternity!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Poor Kolhapur, I actually feel quite sorry for her. Anyway, the next day, all the Tyseley engines were indeed doing their jobs and were trying their best to hold in their excitement. Swindon and Pannier were shunting in a yard and they were in discussion.

**Swindon:** I'm glad the Fat Director thinks we're really useful engines bro.

**Pannier:** Yeah, me to.

**Swindon:** You know, I remember when Princess Elizabeth told me the story about the time she had a race with Roberto the Bus. She told me that she was whooshing through tunnels and was stopping inches from buffers.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Then, Swindon made his mistake.

**Swindon:** Just like this she said!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Without thinking, Swindon surged forward and burst through some buffers, crashed through a fence, rolled down the hill and smashed through a brick wall!

**Pannier:** _(gasps)_ Bro, are you okay?!

**Swindon:** _(groans)_ Argh shit, what does it look like to you?!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** No one was seriously injured in the crash, although Swindon's front was badly bent. The Fat Director was in his office and he was about to enjoy an ice bun when the telephone rang.

**The Fat Director:** Oh bloody, buggering hell! Why must that damn telephone always ring when I'm just about to eat or in the middle of eating something, why must it always do that?!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** He soon calmed down enough to answer the telephone.

**The Fat Director:** Hello…what?!…Swindon has had an accident has he?!…Right, I'll send up the workmen. However, if they can't mend Swindon in time then we'll have to go to the National Railway Museum without him.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Workmen and cranes were soon on the scene but poor Swindon was feeling very miserable. Even the other Tyseley engines were worried for their friend. The next morning at Tyseley station as the clock struck 8, the engines were waiting at the station. Pannier had been placed onto a flatbed truck for some unknown reason and Clun Castle had pushed him into place behind her brother Earl of Mount Edgcumbe. Princess Elizabeth and Rood Ashton Hall were waiting to lead off. The Princess was beginning to loose patience though.

**Princess Elizabeth:** _(blows whistle impatiently)_ Where's Swindon?! Why's thou taking so long to get here?!

**Rood Ashton Hall:** Take it easy Princess, patience's a virtue remember?

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Princess Elizabeth sighed in annoyance as the Fat Director looked at his watch.

**The Fat Director:** Alright, we'll wait one more minute for Swindon then we have to go.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Just as he said that though, he could see Swindon emerging from the Loco Works in the distance and making his way to the station. Swindon soon puffed in.

**Swindon:** Oh thank goodness you lot are still here. I hope I'm not late as it's just after eight?

**The Fat Director:** Don't worry Swindon, you're just in time.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Swindon was very relieved. Just then, with all the Tyseley engines present, the guard blew his whistle and waved his flag. The engines cheered.

**Engines:** Look out National Railway Museum, here we come!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** And then the cavalcade puffed away. It was a long journey but eventually, they arrived at the National Railway Museum where they were met by the little girl, her family, her friends and some familiar faces.

**Mallard:** Welcome my friends!

**Duchess of Hamilton:** We were told you lot were coming for this get together party so we came up with the idea of staging it here to make the occasion even more special!

**King George V:** I hope you guys enjoy your stay here!

**Evening Star:** Yeah, especially since we all know that the little girl will certainly be having a wonderful time!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** And Evening Star was right. But it wasn't just the little girl because everyone was having a wonderful time at the National Railway Museum once all the engines were position inside the Museum around the turntable. King George V was making pleasant conversation with his female companions Duchess of Hamilton and Evening Star, the Tyseley engines were also deep in chatter while Mallard was telling the little girl, her friends and their families about the time she set the world record for being the fastest steam engine in the world. Swindon meanwhile was thinking about something.

**Swindon:** You know something bro, I'm really glad that the little girl wrote to us.

**Pannier:** Yeah, so am I.

**Swindon:** _(smiles)_ I mean, isn't it wonderful what happiness a letter can bring?

**And that's episode 115/episode 42 of T&FMLA Series 4 done! Hope you enjoyed my parody of TTTE episode **_**'Thomas and the Special Letter'**_**. Please review and I request criticism. And on that bombshell, it's time to end, thanks very much for reading, goodnight!**


	43. Horse and Harry

**Tonight - Fatso admits to something, Tornado feels clever and…HORSES CAN FLY?!**

_**Tornado and Friends Mainline Adventures**_

Hello readers of this not very good and not so popular fanfic series, this' Olton Hall, aka Hogwarts Castle here and my friend from the air Harry the Helicopter gets his second episode of this series. You see, he was beginning to feel left out of the vicars annual fete celebrations. His chance to be a part of it soon came though when the carthorse got herself into a bit of a problem. What sort of problem was it? Well find out now as I narrate what turned out to be our version of TTTE episode _'Harold and the Flying Horse'_. Enjoy!

**This episode stars:**

**Harry the Helicopter**

**LMS Black 5 no.45407 **_**'Lancashire Fusilier'**_

**LMS Royal Scot no.46115 **_**'Scots Guardsman'**_

**LNER Peppercorn A1 no.60163 **_**'Tornado'**_

**SR N15 King Arthur no.(30)777 **_**'Sir Lamiel'**_

**The Fat Director**

**Filly the Carthorse**

**BR Standard Class 8 no.71000 **_**'Duke of Gloucester'**__**(mentioned)**_

Episode 116: Horse and Harry

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** My friend Harry the Helicopter's glad that he isn't a steam engine because he was much happier flying through the sky. He'd rather do that than race along the road or the rails…bastard. One sunny summers morning, the engines were busy preparing for the vicars annual fete. And before you ask, it's the same vicar who's bees stung Duke of Gloucester in the nose and the same vicar who hosted that garden party to raise money for a seaside trip for some children.

**Harry:** _(calls)_ I'd like to help you all out but I'm on patrol!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Harry was looking out to see if he could see any of my friends that might be having problems. The engines meanwhile were puffing to and fro with their loads for the fete. Lancashire Fusilier had brought in some deckchairs, decorations, tables, tea earns and reminders. He then managed to spot Harry flying overhead.

**Lancashire Fusilier:** _(calls)_ Hey Harry, don't forget to come to the vicars fete!

**Harry:** _(calls back)_ Thanks for the invitation Lancashire Fusilier but duty calls!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Harry then buzzed away. Later, Harry was landing at his airfield to get more fuel when he saw Filly, a carthorse that lived close by. Filly was getting ready to give rides to children. She had a shiny leather harness and a freshly painted cart which shone in the sunshine, well it would wouldn't it as it was painted bright red like me!

**Filly:** _(neighs)_

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** As Harry was watching, and while he was being refuelled, he was beginning to feel rather left out of the celebrations. He was starting to wish more than ever that he could help. That afternoon, Harry could see Scots Guardsman puffing into the nearby station to pick up more passengers.

**Harry:** _(buzzes)_ Where might you be going next then Scots Guardsman?

**Scots Guardsman:** To the vicars fete of course. Isn't everyone?

**Harry:** Everyone except me because I'm on duty.

**Scots Guardsman:** _(kindly)_ Yes indeed you are Harry. And being a rescue helicopter's very important work.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Just then, the guard blew his whistle and Scots Guardsman puffed away with his coaches, whistling goodbye to Harry as he went.

**Harry:** _(sighs)_ But no one needs rescuing,

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Later that afternoon, Harry was back on duty when the surprise arrived. His pilot received an urgent call from the Fat Director. Harry flew immediately to the station where the Fat Director had arranged to speak to him. Tornado was already at the station running her own passenger train so she watched as Harry landed and the Fat Director then spoke to him.

**The Fat Director:** _(urgently)_ Filly's fallen into a ditch! If she doesn't get to the vicars fete, all the children will be very disappointed! So Harry, you must rescue her at once!

**Harry:** All set and ready for action!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Harry then buzzed away to the rescue but a watching Tornado was confused.

**Tornado:** Filly sir? That's the name of a baby pony isn't it?

**The Fat Director:** _(admittingly)_ Well Tornado, well Filly was born, we initially thought she was a filly so we decided to give her that name because we couldn't think of anything else. But then someone told us that it was actually a horse that gave birth to Filly, not a pony. And unfortunately is was too late for a name change so we were stuck with it really. I know that sounds rather stupid but it's the truth, so now you know.

**Tornado:** _(giggles)_ Yeah, that IS rather stupid. I mean, isn't that like saying horses can fly because they can't.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Tornado then puffed away feeling very clever about the 'horses can't fly' quote. Meanwhile, poor Filly was neighing for help from inside the ditch where she was stuck.

**Filly:** _(neighs)_

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** See what I mean? Sir Lamiel had witnessed this unfortunate event take place while Filly's cart was being loaded onto his flatbed truck. Just then, Harry flew in onto the scene and landed nearby.

**Sir Lamiel:** Oh Harry, thank goodness you're here.

**Harry:** What happened Sir Lamiel?

**Sir Lamiel:** Well we were just loading the cart when Filly wondered off into that ditch the stupid thing! And now look at her, she's stuck! If you can take her then I can take the cart.

**Harry:** I know, I can put Filly in my sling!

**Sir Lamiel:** _(whistles)_ We need to hurry though Harry because the fete's about to begin.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Sir Lamiel then wheeshed away with the cart on the flatbed truck behind. Harry's pilot meanwhile got out and preceded to attach Harry's sling under Filly. When the sling was attached, the pilot returned to Harry. With everything ready, Harry slowly raised into the air. Before long, he was gently lifting Filly out of the ditch and into the air with him. He then preceded to carry him across the fields. Meanwhile, Tornado was still on the same passenger train. When she looked up and saw Filly flying through the sky, she was amazed.

**Tornado:** Flatten my funnel, so horses can fly after all!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** The children from the station were all cheering for Harry, he had saved the day. Harry soon arrived at the sight were the fete was taking place. He carefully and gently lowered Filly back onto the grassy ground where the sling was unattached. Filly was then hitched up to his waiting cart. Thanks to Harry, the fete was a great success, the music provided by the brass band was wonderful to listen to and all the children really enjoyed themselves, their undisputed best moment was when they got to ride in the cart behind Filly. As for Harry, well he was happy because he had stayed on duty AND had fun at the fete to.

**And that's episode 116/episode 43 of T&FMLA Series 4 done! Hope you enjoyed my parody of TTTE episode **_**'Harold and the Flying Horse'**_**. Please review, I request criticism and I apologise if it's a bit short. And on that bombshell, it's time to end, thanks very much for reading, goodnight!**


	44. Again This Mud and Dirt

**Tonight - we find out who Korra and Claire refer to as their 'master', a Black 5's all dirty and we see a famous moment for a second time but with a change of cast.**

_**Tornado and Friends Mainline Adventures**_

Hello readers of this not very good and not so popular fanfic series, this' Olton Hall, aka Hogwarts Castle here and remember back in the very first episode of this series when Tornado re-enacted James by slipping down the Lickey Incline? Well, in today's episode, the exact same thing happens again, only this time with a different engine…and lots of other things happen as well. Which engine was it slipping down the hill this time? we'll find out now as I narrate what turned out to be our version of TTTE episode _'The Trouble with Mud'_. Enjoy!

**This episode stars:**

**Tennille the Class 08 Shunting Diesel**

**Korra the Class 11 Shunting Diesel**

**Claire the Class 12 Shunting Diesel**

**LNER B1 no.61264 (who we named Thompson)**

**GWR 5700 Class no.7752/London Transport no.L94 (who we named Pannier)**

**LMS Black 5 no.44767 **_**'George Stephenson'**_** and his driver**

**SR Merchant Navy no.35028 **_**'Clan Line'**_

**SR Battle of Britain no.34067 **_**'Tangmere'**_

**LMS 8F no.48151 **_**'Gauge O Guild'**_

**LMS Princess Royal no.46201 **_**'Princess Elizabeth'**_

**GWR 5700 Class no.9600 (who we named Swindon)**

**LNER Peppercorn A1 no.60163 **_**'Tornado'**_

**LMS Black 5 no.45212 '**_**Roy**__**'Korky' Green'**_

**The Fat Director**

Episode 117: Again This Mud and Dirt

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** It was a calm autumn morning in Great Britain and Korra, Claire and Tennille were all shunting trucks in the same yard.

**Tennille:** Come along you two, we've got to get Thompson's goods train ready.

**Korra and Claire:** Thompson?!

**Tennille:** Oh did no one tell you that it was Thompson's goods train?

**Korra:** No, no one told us.

**Claire:** Well we'd better get going. I mean, it's Thompson, the engine who saved us from scrap.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Now knowing that it was Thompson's morning goods train that they were shunting, Korra and Claire were in doubly quick time. A surprised Tennille watched at her two fellow shunting diesels soon had all the trucks shunted and in line.

**Tennille:** _(amazed)_ Geez you two, that was quick!

**Korra:** Well it's Thompson's train were shunting and, as Claire said, he saved us from scrap.

**Claire:** Yeah, we must always do our best for him to show our gratitude.

**Tennille:** _(whispers)_ Shame you can't do the same for me.

**Korra and Claire:** What was that?!

**Tennille:** _(quickly)_ Oh nothing.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Just then, the three heard a whistle and saw Thompson reversing towards his waiting train of trucks. He soon buffered up and was coupled on.

**Thompson:** Thanks you three.

**Korra and Claire:** Anytime master!

**Thompson:** Master?

**Tennille:** They're showing their gratitude for saving them from scrap.

**Thompson:** Err…okay.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** With the trucks coupled up, Thompson whistled goodbye to his diesel friends and steamed away. Just as he left, Korra and Claire whirred off to carry on with their shunting. Just before Tennille could join them, she spotted Pannier puffing in to take on more water.

**Tennille:** Morning Pannier.

**Pannier:** Oh good morning Tennille.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Pannier watched as Tennille left the yard. As Pannier was having his water stop, George Stephenson puffed alongside him on the mainline. Mud and dirt had splattered all over his smart black paint.

**Pannier:** _(teasingly)_ Hello Georgie, you look as if you've had a mud bath! Why don't you be a sensible engine and go and have a shower or something!

**George Stephenson:** _(snorts)_ I don't have time to dawdle over my appearance like silly little tank engines such as you do!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Just then, Clan Line puffed in.

**Clan Line:** _(sternly)_ Alright, that's enough from you Pannier, no once your water tanks are filled, go and shunt my coaches for my VSOE Pullman Special.

**Pannier:** _(sighs)_ Yes Clan Line.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Once Pannier was filled up with water, he puffed away to fetch Clan Line's coaches.

**Clan Line:** I'm sorry about him George Stephenson, though he's right that you do need a shower.

**George Stephenson:** _(snorts)_ Oh what do you know Clan Line you old bitch!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** George Stephenson steamed away in a huff leaving Clan Line feeling very hurt. Later, the wind was picking up and it was getting stronger. As George Stephenson puffed along, his driver noticed a strange smell go up his nostrils.

**George Stephenson's Driver:** _(calls)_ Phew George, slow down!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Hearing this just made George Stephenson even crosser.

**George Stephenson:** _(hisses crossly)_ I'll be dirty and late, dirty and late!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** He soon arrived at the wash down where he found that there was a sign which read 'All trains must wash down daily'. Tangmere had just finished being cleaned.

**George Stephenson's Driver:** Come on George, you'll feel better after a good hose down.

**George Stephenson:** _(lets off steam furiously)_ PAH!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Tangmere gasped as the steam that George Stephenson furiously let off. Not only did it go all over her but so did some of the mud and dirt. Once Tangmere stopped her spinning eyes, she saw that her green paint was covered in mud and dirt. She was now having another attempt at taking being known as the 'Dirty Lady' to the next level.

**Tangmere:** _(furiously)_ Will you stop referring to that Olton Hall?!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Hehehe, sorry. Anyway, Tangmere wasn't the only one to get covered on the mud and dirt because some of the men who were painting her got covered to. As did a fuming George Stephenson's driver.

**George Stephenson's Driver:** _(furiously)_ You're a very naughty engine! Now Tangmere will need another shower and you'll have to wait for your turn later!

**George Stephenson:** _(huffs)_ Good riddance! I'm far too busy to waste my time with water!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** That afternoon, George Stephenson reversed into station where the Fat Director was waiting for him, as were all the passengers as they boarded the waiting coaches. However, when the Fat Director saw George Stephenson, he wasn't happy.

**The Fat Director:** _(angrily)_ Goodness gracious me! You can't pull the train, Gauge O Guild will have to do it!

**Gauge O Guild:** Nice one!

**The Fat Director:** _(angrily)_ George Stephenson, you had better go and get cleaned straight away!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** So George Stephenson huffed away back to the wash down. Once he arrived, he was soon being washed.

**George Stephenson:** _(groans)_ Mind my eyes!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Once he was washed, he pulled trucks for the rest of the day and he wasn't happy about it…which I don't get because isn't he a mixed traffic engine? Anyway, he bumped them hard alongside a watching Tangmere who was getting ready to take a big express.

**George Stephenson:** That's for you, and you, and you!

**Tangmere:** Trucks will be trucks.

**George Stephenson:** _(snorts)_ They won't with me, I'll show them!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** And he then carried on bashing the trucks about. By the way, if you're wondering why it's Tangmere getting ready to take this big express instead of Gauge O Guild, well…

**(Flashback)**

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Before taking that express, Gauge O Guild had a brief goods train to take. Unfortunately, while taking that goods train, he had a little accident and derailed. When the Fat Director found out, he wasn't happy.

**The Fat Director:** _(impatiently)_ Gauge O Guild, this isn't the flying kipper you know! Now Tangmere's gonna have to take that big express.

**Gauge O Guild:** _(miserably)_ Sorry sir.

**(End of flashback)**

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** So now you all know. Anyway, later that afternoon, Tangmere was now ready to take her express when George Stephenson returned.

**George Stephenson:** _(warningly)_ Be careful Tangmere because the Lickey Incline's slippery so you may need help.

**Tangmere:** _(grumpily)_ Listen Georgie, I may be old and known as the 'Dirty Lady' but I don't need help on hills! You just think you know everything!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** She then whistled and clanked away. George Stephenson sighed as he watched Tangmere depart. Also watching them was Tornado, Princess Elizabeth and Swindon.

**Princess Elizabeth:** We have a feeling that this isn't to go very well for the Dirty Lady.

**Swindon:** She'll probably have to rely on an engine to help her up the Incline. But like how I helped you two.

**Tornado:** _(huffily)_ Oh be quiet you little berk! Besides, that happened when I was painted blue! Now that I'm repainted back into green, the same thing won't happen again!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Meanwhile, earlier in the day, leaves had been blown onto the track through some strong winds. Even though the winds had now passed, the Incline was still difficult to climb and Tangmere knew this but she was determined to prove to George Stephenson that she can climb it despite all the leaves. As she steamed through Bromsgrove station, she knew the Incline was next so she picked up speed.

**Tangmere:** _(puffs)_ I'll do it, I'll do it!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** However, by the time Tangmere reached the half way point, she was no longer so sure as she found herself starting to slow down.

**Tangmere:** I must do it, I must do it!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** It was no good though as her wheels slipped on the leaves. She couldn't pull the train at all now. Then, she found herself going backwards!

**Tangmere:** _(cries)_ Help, help!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Tangmere's wheels were turning forward but the combination of the leaves and the heavy coaches were pulling her backwards. The whole train was now slipping down the Incline. Her driver shut off steam and put on the brakes and then he carefully stopped the train at the bottom of the Incline. Unfortunately for Tangmere, George Stephenson was already there and he had seen everything.

**George Stephenson:** Ah well, we live and learn. Never mind Tangmere, this isn't the first time this has happened this series, I mean Swindon told me that Tornado suffered the exact same problem. Now then, lets get you up that Incline shall we?

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** George Stephenson changed tracks and was buffered up to the back of the train. Working together, the two engines set off. Clouds of smoke and steam towered from the snorting duo as they headed up the Incline.

**Tangmere:** _(puffs)_ We can do it!

**George Stephenson:** _(puffs)_ We will do it!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Eventually, they reached the top. George Stephenson slowed down as Tangmere clanked onwards.

**Tangmere:** _(whistles)_ PEEP-PEEP, thank you Georgie, goodbye!

**George Stephenson:** POOP-POOP, goodbye Dirty Lady!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** George Stephenson watched as Tangmere disappeared into the distance. And you know, it still makes me giggle that he's being referred to as Georgie.

**George Stephenson:** _(angrily)_ I actually don't like being referred to by that girls name so I wish everyone would stop calling that!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** _(giggles)_ Hehehe. Anyway, that evening, George Stephenson was resting in the sidings with some of his friends when the Fat Director walked up to them.

**Roy 'Korky' Green:** Please sir, can my brother George Stephenson go back to pulling passenger trains as well as goods trains again?

**The Fat Director:** Well, if you understand that having a good wash down's essential to every engine then yes George Stephenson, you may.

**George Stephenson:** _(grunts happily)_ Oh thank you sir!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Then the Fat Director walked away. The other engines started to settle down to sleep.

**George Stephenson:** _(murmurs)_ Dirty or clean, I'm a famous machine.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** No one heard but him…well, except Roy 'Korky' Green, what with them being brothers and all.

**And that's episode 117/episode 44 of T&FMLA Series 4 done! Hope you enjoyed my parody of TTTE episode **_**'The Trouble With Mud'**_**. Please review and I request criticism. And on that bombshell, it's time to end, thanks very much for reading, goodnight!**


	45. A Bad Joke

**Tonight - Princess Elizabeth teases Bittern, Bittern's footplate crew play a joke on Princess Elizabeth and Princess Elizabeth's footplate crew play a joke on Bittern.**

_**Tornado and Friends Mainline Adventures**_

Hello readers of this not very good and not so popular fanfic series, this' Olton Hall, aka Hogwarts Castle here and I remember the time when my friends Bittern and Princess Elizabeth got themselves some sort of a joke battle. It all started when Bittern just wouldn't shut the hell up so the Princess decided to tease her. How did she tease the A4 exactly that prompted this joke battle? Well find out now as I narrate what turned out to be our version of TTTE episode _'Donald's Duck'_. Enjoy!

**This episode stars:**

**LNER A4 no.4464 **_**'Bittern'**_** and her footplate crew**

**LMS Princess Royal no.46201 **_**'Princess Elizabeth'**_

**GWR Hall no.4936 **_**'Kinlet Hall'**_

**LNER Peppercorn A1 no.60163 **_**'Tornado'**_

**The Fat Director**

Episode 118: A Bad Joke

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** My A4 friend Bittern's the fastest engine currently working on the mainline, as you should probably know by now. She had been working very hard on the passenger trains recently and the Fat Director was very impressed, so he decided to reward her.

**The Fat Director:** Bittern, I've been very impressed with your passenger work lately, so I've decided that you shall haul this years Torbay Express along the coast.

**Bittern:** _(delightfully)_ Oh yes sir, thank you sir!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** It had been awhile since Bittern got to haul the Torbay Express, one of the big expresses on the mainline, so she was very excited. She was soon taking the train along the line later that morning. She puffed round Langstone Rock and along the Dawlish Seawall. She was having the time of her life.

**Bittern:** This' just like being on holiday!

**Bittern's Driver:** Well you know what they say, a change's as good as a rest!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Bittern had a fantastic day hauling the Torbay Express and the passengers had a great time riding behind her. Bittern felt her responsibility deeply and that evening, she talked endlessly about it to Princess Elizabeth.

**Bittern:** You don't understand Princess, how much the Fat Director relies on me!

**Princess Elizabeth:** _(mutters sleepily)_ Yes, yes, whatever.

**Bittern:** I'm an A4 and I…

**Princess Elizabeth:** Quack, quack, quack!

**Bittern:** What?!

**Princess Elizabeth:** Thou heard, quack, quack thou goes, sounds like thou had an egg laid, thou is named after a breed of bird after all and ducks are also a type of bird, now be silenced and let a Princess go home and get some sleep!

**Bittern:** _(indignantly)_ Oh quack yourself you royal bitch and your third person language!

**Princess Elizabeth:** And thou should mind hers.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Princess Elizabeth then puffed away for home to get some sleep, leaving behind a seething Bittern. The next morning, Bittern had calmed down and was now talking to her footplate crew about what Princess Elizabeth had said last night.

**Bittern:** Princess Elizabeth says I quack, as if I've laid an egg.

**Bittern's Driver:** _(ponders)_ Quack do you?

**Bittern's Fireman:** Hey, you two, I've got an idea.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** The fireman then preceded to whisper his idea to Bittern and the driver, they were going to play a joke on Princess Elizabeth to pay her back for teasing Bittern. All the mainline engines were kept busy for the rest of the day and nothing more was said, not even a quack. At last, night time came and Bittern's driver and fireman made their way to Tyseley Locomotive Works. When they spotted a fast asleep Princess Elizabeth, they preceded to pop something into her water tank.

**Bittern's Driver:** _(sniggers)_ Oh this plan of yours is brilliant mate.

**Bittern's Fireman:** _(chuckles)_ Lizzie's driver and fireman are in for a real surprise.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** The next morning, when Princess Elizabeth stopped for water, her driver and fireman found that they had an unexpected passenger onboard. A small white duckling popped out of her water tank.

**Princess Elizabeth:** _(laughs)_ Well then, who's behind this we wonder?

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** The duckling was tamed. She shared the fireman's sandwiches and rode in the tender as the Princess hauled her passenger trains. The other engines enjoyed teasing the Princess about her, such as here for example as my sister Kinlet Hall and Tornado were the ones doing the teasing.

**Kinlet Hall:** _(teasingly)_ Hello Princess, having fun with your new quacky friend?

**Tornado:** _(cheekily)_ You're even more quackier than Bittern!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** The poor Princess had to put up with this constant teasing and it was really starting to annoy her. Presently though, the duckling grew tired of travelling so Princess Elizabeth dropped her off at Dawlish station and there she stayed. That night, Princess Elizabeth's driver and fireman got busy, especially since they were in luck as Bittern was sleeping with Princess Elizabeth and her fellow Tyseley engines at Tyseley Locomotive Works for the night. In the morning, when Bittern's footplate crew arrived they couldn't stop themselves from bursting out into laughter.

**Bittern's Driver:** _(laughs)_ Look Bittern, look what's under your tender, it's a nest box with an egg in it!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Upon hearing their laughter, Princess Elizabeth opened a sleepy eye.

**Princess Elizabeth:** Well, well, well, thou must've laid it in the night Bittern, all unbeknownst.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Then, Bittern laughed to as she also saw the funny side.

**Bittern:** _(laughs)_ Alright Lizzie you win, it'd take a clever engine to get the better of you.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** On one side of Dawlish station, you'll find the seaside. On the other side though, you'll find a stream where the duckling can be found having a little swim and she'll always wave to the engines as they pass by. The stationmaster decided to name her Lizzie, after the Princess, but to everyone else, she's always Bittern's duck.

**And that's episode 118/episode 45 of T&FMLA Series 4 done! Hope you enjoyed my parody of TTTE episode **_**'Donald's Duck'**_**. Please review, I request criticism and I apologise if it's a bit short. And on that bombshell, it's time to end, thanks very much for reading, goodnight!**


	46. May from the Depot

**Tonight - one of the narrators sisters loses patience, a diesel character somehow makes a return and a bus and a traction engine get held up.**

_**Tornado and Friends Mainline Adventures**_

Hello readers of this not very good and not so popular fanfic series, this' Olton Hall, aka Hogwarts Castle here and you know something, as we enter episode number 119, we still haven't met May the Class 03 Shunter. I remember when she first came about, she was really getting on my sister Pitchford Hall's nerves. She soon got her comeuppance though for calling my sister names, as you'll now find out as I narrate what turned out to be our version of TTTE episode _'Mavis'_. Enjoy!

**This episode stars:**

**BR Class 03 Shunting Diesel no.D2381 (who we shall name May)**

**GWR Hall no.4953 **_**'Pitchford Hall'**_** and her driver**

**Devlin the Class 09 Shunting Diesel**

**Roberto the Bus**

**Amara the Traction Engine**

**The Troublesome Trucks**

**The Fat Director **_**(mentioned)**_

Episode 119: May from the Depot

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** May is a diesel engine who works for the West Coast Railway Company by shunting trucks in their sidings at the various depots. She's small, green and has six wheels. May's full of her own ideas. She loves rearranging things to, meaning she began to put Pitchford Hall's trucks in different places everyday. However, this makes my sister cross.

**Pitchford Hall:** _(grumbles)_ Listen May, trucks should be where you want them, when you want them!

**May:** Fiddlesticks!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** May then flounced away. Eventually though, Pitchford Hall lost patience and she spoke sternly to May the next morning.

**Pitchford Hall:** _(sternly)_ I can't waste time playing 'Hunt the Trucks' with you so you can just take them yourself!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** My sister then huffed angrily away. May though was feeling very pleased because taking trucks made her feel important. Later that day as May was resting, Devlin oiled up alongside her. Hey, wait a minute…how the actual fuck did Devlin get back here, I thought Fatso had sent him packing for a second time?!…Oh never mind, I'll try to find out later, and before you ask, I've got absolutely no idea how.

**May:** _(complains)_ Pitchford Hall's an old fusspot!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** After hearing May's complaint, Devlin sensed trouble and was delighted.

**May:** Pitchford Hall says only steam engines can manage trucks!

**Devlin:** How absurd. Depend upon it May, anything steam engines can do, we diesels can do better.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Devlin knew nothing about trucks but May didn't realise this…and how dare May call my sister an old fusspot! Anyway, on one part of the mainline near to the depot where May was working, the track crosses with a road and next to it, there's an old farm lane. Frosty weather makes the muddy lane rock hard and very slippery. Whenever Pitchford Hall approaches the lane, she always stops before actually reaching it. Using his red flags, her fireman halts the traffic at the crossing as there weren't any crossing barriers and then Pitchford Hall sets off again. By using the heavy trucks to push her along, she has no problems with the frosty rails in the lane. It's the only safe thing to do in this kind of weather. When Pitchford Hall returned to the depot, she warned May about the lane and told her just what to do.

**May:** _(crossly)_ I can manage thank you because I'm not an old fusspot like you!

**Pitchford Hall:** _(sighs and speaks to herself)_ Now watch her mess it up.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** May then rumbled away with her trucks. Before long, she saw the farm lane in the distance. However, the trucks had grown tired of being pushed around by May in the depot.

**Trucks:** _(whispers)_ It's slippery so lets push her around instead. _(yells)_ On, on, on!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** May however took no notice of them. Instead, she brought the trucks carefully down the lane and stopped at the level crossing. All traffic, in the form of Roberto the Bus with his passengers and Amara the Traction Engine with a cartload of…things, halted.

**May:** _(chortles)_ One in the headlamp for fusspot Pitchford Hall!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Then there was trouble because May had stopped in the wrong place. She hadn't taken the advice my sister had given her and instead she had given the trucks the chance they wanted.

**Trucks:** _(cries)_ Hold back, hold back!

**May:** _(orders)_ Grrrr, ah!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** The trucks though just laughed as May continued to try to pull away but her wheels just kept spinning helplessly, meaning she was stuck. The news about the road blockage soon reached the workmen who arrived on the scene in their pickup truck as soon as they possibly could. They had brought sandbags and shovels. They poured the sand onto the rails and tried to dig away the frozen mud but it was no good. At by this point, everyone was getting impatient and this included Roberto and Amara.

**Roberto:** _(crossly)_ Come on May, my passengers are now late!

**Amara:** _(impatiently)_ And I must deliver this cartload so get a bloody move on!

**May:** _(wails)_ Grrrr, argh!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Meanwhile, the news about May had just reached my sister who was still at the depot and she was furious.

**Pitchford Hall:** _(furiously)_ I warned that square faced box on wheels!

**Pitchford Hall's Driver:** _(soothingly)_ Give her a chance will ya? I mean, she has only just returned to work following a long overhaul and…

**Pitchford Hall:** She can manage her trucks herself!

**Pitchford Hall's Driver:** They're your trucks really. May's supposed to stay at the quarry. What if the Fat Director finds out?

**Pitchford Hall:** _(thoughtfully)_ Hmm, yes…

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** In the end, both my sister and her driver decided that it would be best to help May after all, so they set off to the rescue. Back with May now and one of Roberto's passengers, who was a farmer, was angrily telling her just what she could do with her train…and so he should 'cause this'll serve her right for calling my sister an old fusspot! And speaking of my sister, here she is.

**Pitchford Hall:** _(chortles)_ Having trouble are you May? I am surprised.

**May:** Grrrr!

**Pitchford Hall:** _(buffers up to May)_ Alright, alright, calm down, I'll get you out of this situation okay?

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Ma said nothing as with much puffing and wheel slip, Pitchford Hall pushed May and the trucks back down the lane. The hard work was making her fire burn fiercely and her fireman spread hot cinders to melt the frozen mud. Eventually, Pitchford Hall was finished and May was out of the lane.

**Pitchford Hall:** _(calls)_ Goodbye May, you'll manage now I expect!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** My sister then puffed away. May however didn't answer her. All she did do was take her trucks to the sheds and then scuttled back to the depot as quickly as she could. More was to follow the next day but that's another story.

**And that's episode 119/episode 46 of T&FMMLA Series 4 done! Hope you enjoyed my parody of TTTE episode **_**'Mavis'**_**. Please review, I request criticism and I apologise if it's a bit short. And on that bombshell, it's time to end, thanks very much for reading, goodnight!**


	47. Hanging in the Air

**Tonight - a shunting diesel still thinks the narrator sister's a fusspot, the trucks fail to keep a promise and we see a steam engine attempt to be a tightrope walker.**

_**Tornado and Friends Mainline Adventures**_

Hello readers of this not very good and not so popular fanfic series, this' Olton Hall, aka Hogwarts Castle here and for this episode, we're carrying on from the previous episode. May still wasn't happy about the whole ordeal from yesterday. She soon however had the chance to redeem herself when my sister Pitchford Hall was in great danger. Find out how it all spanned out now as I narrate what turned out to be our version of TTTE episode _'Toby's Tightrope'_. Enjoy!

**This episode stars:**

**GWR 9400 Class no.9466 (who we named Hawksworth)**

**BR Class 03 Shunting Diesel no.D2381 (who we named May)**

**GWR Hall no.4953 **_**'Pitchford Hall'**_

**The Troublesome Trucks**

**The Fat Director**

**A Depot Manager**

Episode 120: Hanging in the Air

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** The day after the previous episode, Hawksworth arrived at the depot to collect some goods for his trucks. Snow and frost was laying everywhere and there wasn't a sound to be heard. Hawksworth ventured further and he soon found May the Class 03 Shunter resting in the shelter of a siding alongside the main building.

**Hawksworth:** _(whistles)_ Cheer up May.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** May didn't cheer up though because she was still remembering the trouble she had with the trucks yesterday.

**May:** Manager says I don't listen to advice and he said that I've no business going down that part of the mainline. And it's all Pitchford Hall's fault, she's a fusspot!

**Hawksworth:** Pitchford Hall has forgotten more about trucks than you'll ever know! You must put the trucks where she wants them and then you'll be a really useful engine! Now if you'll excuse me, I've got to take these goods to the harbour.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Hawksworth then reversed away from May and changed tracks so he was one the track where his trucks were waiting. He then puffed forward and was coupled up to them. As he was only a tank engine, it was okay for him to travel backwards so he was going to take this goods train bunker first to save time. May liked Hawksworth as she watched him puff away with his trucks, however she still wouldn't listen to his advice.

**May:** Why shouldn't I go on the mainline?!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** The siding arrangements were awkward. To put the trucks where Pitchford Hall wants them, May had to make several journeys. She was soon finished and as she was resting, she started making a plan which she explained to her driver.

**May:** If we use the teeniest bit of the mainline, we'd save all this bother.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Her driver, suspecting nothing, allowed them to go as far as the first level crossing. A few days later, the weather changed. As the snow melted, the depot grew busy again. Some trains were so long that May had to go beyond the level crossing. Now for her plan. She'll go further down the line without it seeming her fault. May pulled up alongside some trucks.

**May:** Can you keep a secret?

**Trucks:** _(chattering)_ Yes, yes, yes!

**May:** Will you bump me at the level crossing and tell no one I asked you?

**Trucks:** We promise!

**May:** Thank you.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** May then purred away. However, while she was absent, my sister Pitchford Hall arrived. She had decided to take the trucks herself. The trucks had decided to bump her anyway. Pitchford Hall reached the level crossing where her brakes then came on, this was the signal for the trucks as they began to surge forward.

**Trucks:** _(yells)_ On, on, on!

**Pitchford Hall:** What the…?!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** My poor sister was away with the trucks screaming and yelling behind! Up ahead, no one realised that the melted snow had turned a stream into a torrent and the bridge above it was about to collapse! A big log…no, not that sort of big log!…came surging through the torrent and it then crashed into a bridge support, knocking it down. The rails were now like a tightrope across the thundering water. As a runaway Pitchford Hall came around a bend, she saw the damaged bridge up ahead.

**Pitchford Hall:** _(cries)_ Stop, stop!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Her driver fought for control as they came nearer and nearer to the bridge! It was all or nothing now! The driver applied the brakes! Pitchford Hall stopped still on the rails but with her wheels treading the tightrope over the abyss.

**Pitchford Hall:** _(cries)_ Holy shit, help, help!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Don't you worry sister, help will soon arrive! Meanwhile, back at the depot, May was back on her shunting duties. She had just pushed some trucks into a siding when the depot manager hurried up to her.

**Depot Manager:** _(gasping)_ Oh May, thank goodness I've found you!

**May:** What's the problem sir?

**Depot Manager:** Pitchford Hall's stuck on a damaged bridge, you've got to go and save her!

**May:** Oh no! Right, I'm on my way sir!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** May raced away to the rescue. As she got closer, her worries were getting into her.

**May:** _(worryingly)_ I hope I'm not too late!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Fortunately she wasn't as she hurried onto the scene.

**May:** _(calls)_ Don't worry Pitchford Hall, I'll get you out of this mess!

**Pitchford Hall:** _(relieved)_ Oh May, thank goodness you're here!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** The workmen anchored Pitchford Hall with rope while May pulled the trucks away. One they were out of the way, one end of a rope was attached her and the other end to Pitchford Hall. May then preceded to pull my sister to safety. After much pulling and wheel slipping, May had got Pitchford Hall back on firm rails.

**May:** Oh Pitchford Hall, I'm sorry about the trucks. I can't think how you managed to stop them in time.

**Pitchford Hall:** Oh well. My driver told me about circus people who walk tightropes but I just didn't fancy doing it myself.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Hehehe, that's a good one sister. Anyway, later on, the Fat Director arrived.

**The Fat Director:** A very smart piece of work. May, you did well to I hear.

**May:** It, it was my fault about those trucks sir. But if I could…

**The Fat Director:** Could what?

**May:** Come down the line sometime sir? Pitchford Hall said she'd show me what to do.

**The Fat Director:** Well, providing that your manager agrees, then certainly.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** And so it was arranged. Now May's as happy as can be and the Fat Director believes that she's really useful indeed.

**And that's episode 120/episode 47 of T&FMLA Series 4 done! Hope you enjoyed my parody of TTTE episode**_** 'Toby's Tightrope'**_**. Please review, I request criticism and I apologise if it's a bit short. And on that bombshell, it's time to end, thanks very much for reading, goodnight!**


	48. Friendship Always Wins

**Tonight - a steam rail motor worries about being late, the boss's nowhere to be found on a station platform and a bus comes to the aid of passengers.**

_**Tornado and Friends Mainline Adventures**_

Hello readers of this not very good and not so popular fanfic series, this' Olton Hall, aka Hogwarts Castle here and for today's episode, it's actually being set, not on the mainline, but on a branch line. You see, my friend SRM 93 was a regular sight on branch line trains. He'd go round the country, visit every branch line and run passenger trains on them…well, he's basically a motorised coach so what do you expect eh? However, on one day, he ran into trouble. What sort of trouble was it? Well find out now as I narrate what turned out to be our version of TTTE episode _'Thomas Gets Bumped'_. Enjoy!

**This episode stars:**

**GWR Steam Rail Motor no.93 (known as SRM 93) and his driver**

**BR Standard Class 4 2-6-0 no.76079 **_**'Pocket Rocket'**_

**LMS Jubilee no.45690 **_**'Leander'**_

**LMS Jubilee no.45699 **_**'Galatea'**_

**Roberto the Bus**

**The Fat Director**

**A Man**

**Some Passengers**

Episode 121: Friendship Always Wins

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** SRM 93 the GWR Steam rail motor can often be found hard at work on the UK's various branch lines. For the next few days from today, he was going to be working on the Hertford East Branch Line that ran from Broxbourne to…well, Hertford East. Whenever the passengers see him coming from the stations, they'd always wave to him and he'd whistle back to them. The passengers would continue waving until he was out of sight. One morning at Broxbourne, SRM 93 was waiting for the all clear signal to be given so he could get going but there was delays occurring which was making him late. Pocket Rocket was also waiting on the mainline route in the station. Just then, the all clear signal was given meaning SRM 93 could now leave.

**Pocket Rocket:** _(calls)_ Hurry up SRM 93! If you're late, the Fat Director may replace you on branch line duties with those Class 315's or 316's!

**SRM 93:** He would never do that!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Although, as SRM 93 departed from the station, he couldn't help but feel rather worried. The next day, SRM 93 was hurrying along the line. Just ahead was Ware station. As he pulled in, he waited for his passengers to get on and off him, however he did wish that they'd hurry up so he could get going and remain on time. Up in front of the station was a level crossing. The gates of it will be closing when SRM 93 was ready to go. Suddenly, just as SRM 93 thought it was time to go, he saw a man racing along the side of the track towards him and the station.

**SRM 93:** What on earth? Okay, I've heard of running a railroad but that's ridiculous.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** The man hurried over SRM 93's driver and explained the situation.

**Man:** Wait, you can't go yet, I've got a problem and I need your help! You see, I'm a school bus driver and the bus has broken down just down the road! Will you take the school children to Hertford East for me please?! All the parents will be worried if the children were to arrive too late for their tea!

**SRM 93's Driver:** Certainly mate, providing there's enough space for them.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** There wasn't an awful lot of children which was a relief, especially since there was only just enough room for them inside SRM 93. With the children onboard, the level crossing gates closed upon the sound of the crossings siren. Then, SRM 93 whistled out of the station. He hurried along the branch line as fast as he possibly could. He soon arrived at Hertford East station and dropped the happy children off to their parents. However, as nightfall came and as he returned to Broxbourne station, he was very late indeed. He was worried that the Fat Director would be cross with him. The Jubilee sisters Galatea and Leander were already there on the mainline section.

**Leander:** Pocket Rocket told me about SRM 93's occurring lateness Tia. I think it's fair to say that he has now been late one time too many.

**Galatea:** He's going to be in trouble now.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Poor SRM 93 feel even more worried now, the Jubilee sisters really weren't helping. However, the next morning as SRM 93 arrived at Broxbourne station, the Fat Director was nowhere to be seen on the platform.

**SRM 93:** _(sighs with relief)_ Thank goodness for that.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** The guard blew his whistle and SRM 93 set off. SRM 93 knows every part of this branch line having been running on it over the past few days and it was recently announced that he can stay there for even longer before moving onto the next branch line which was yet to be confirmed. As SRM 93 puffed along, he didn't know that he was heading for trouble. Up ahead was a stretch where the hot sun had bent the rails on the track.

**SRM 93's Driver:** _(warningly)_ Lets be careful on this bit of track!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** But it was too late. SRM 93 bumped over the bend and was derailed. Luckily no one was hurt. And you know something, I'M GETTING SO FUCKING TIRED OF SAYING THESE GODDAMN SAME CATCHPHRASES OVER AND OVER AGAIN!

**SRM 93's Driver:** That's done it. We shan't be going any further today.

**SRM 93:** But what about my passengers?

**SRM 93's Driver:** Don't worry, they'll be looked after.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** While workmen repaired the branch line, SRM 93 was told to go to the nearest yard and…well, just stay there really because the mainline had enough passenger trains to go by. As SRM 93 sat sadly in his siding in the yard, Roberto the Bus came to see him on the road.

**Roberto:** I understand that you need my help.

**SRM 93:** _(sadly)_ Yes Roberto. I can't run without my rails.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Roberto then set off to pick up SRM 93's passengers, while SRM 93 himself just continued to sit miserably in his lonely siding. There was signs placed on all the stations of the branch line saying 'Sorry, no trains' so all the passengers were pleased when they saw Roberto arriving.

**Passengers:** Hello Roberto! We're all glad that you're here!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Roberto drove along the road and dropped the passengers off as close as he could get to the stations if he couldn't stopped at them. Sometimes, he'd stop between stations to let some passengers off closer to their homes. And while all this was happening of course, poor old SRM 93 was all alone in his siding and feeling very miserable.

**SRM 93:** _(miserably)_ I've lost all my passengers, they like Roberto better than me!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Eventually, a few days later, the Fat Director came to see SRM 93.

**The Fat Director:** The branch line's repaired SRM 93. I'm going to make some adjustments to your timetable so that you and Roberto can work together more.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** SRM 93 was delighted with this news. He hurried straight to Broxbourne station where he could see all his passengers waiting for him.

**Passengers:** Roberto's a very good bus but we missed our train rides with you.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Later on, SRM 93 met Roberto at Ware station.

**SRM 93:** Thank you for looking after my passengers Roberto.

**Roberto:** Oh that's alright SRM 93. I like to make new friends but I'm happy to share them with you.

**SRM 93:** Roberto, you're a very good friend indeed.

**And that's episode 121/episode 48 of T&FMLA Series 4 done! Hope you enjoyed my parody of TTTE episode **_**'Thomas Gets Bumped'**_**. Please review, I request criticism and I apologise if it's a bit short. And on that bombshell, it's time to end, thanks very much for reading, goodnight!**


	49. Wheel to Wheel You

**Tonight - Lots of engines get only one line to say, County of Essex feels hurt and Ollie rocks and rolls into trouble.**

_**Tornado and Friends Mainline Adventures**_

Hello readers of this not very good and not so popular fanfic series, this' Olton Hall, aka Hogwarts Castle here and I regret to inform you that today's episode will be the penultimate one in this final T&FMLA series. And what's going on here? Well, Oliver Cromwell's in full Duncan mode for this episode, so much so that he didn't like my diesel friend County of Essex. Find out what else happened now as I narrate what turned out to be our version of TTTE episode _'Rock 'n' Roll'_. Enjoy!

**This episode stars:**

**SR Schools Class no.30926 **_**'Repton'**_

**LMS Black 5 no.45231 **_**'Sherwood Forester'**_

**LNER A4 no.60009 **_**'Union of South Africa'**_

**LMS Black 5 no.45428 **_**'Eric Treacy'**_

**LMS Black 5 no.45305 **_**'Alderman A. E. Draper'**_

**Metropolitan Railway E Class no.1 **_**'Met 1'**_** and his faithful Metropolitan Railway carriage Jubilee**

**Metropolitan Railway Electric Locomotive no.12 **_**'Sarah Siddons'**_

**LMS Royal Scot no.46100 **_**'Royal Scot'**_

**GWR King no.6023 **_**'King Edward II'**_

**BR Class 40 Whistler Diesel no.40 145/D345 **_**'East Lancashire Railway'**_** (for this series, known by her other name **_**'Panther'**_**)**

**LNER A1 no.4472 **_**'Flying Scotsman'**_

**BR Class 47 Duff Diesel no.47 580 **_**'County of Essex'**_

**BR Standard Class 7 Britannia no.70013 **_**'Oliver Cromwell'**_** and his driver**

**LMS Black 5 no.44871 **_**'Sovereign'**_

**Devlin the Class 09 Shunting Diesel **_**(mentioned)**_

Episode 122: Wheel to Wheel You

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** It was just another typical morning on the Great British mainline. I mean, just have a look at what's going on at the moment. See, there's Repton taking some children on a school trip.

**Repton:** Like I've often been found doing in this series.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** And there's Sherwood Forester hauling a coal train. That must be dirty work.

**Sherwood Forester:** I don't really care if this' dirty work, as long as I'm being really useful, I'm happy.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** And if we look over here, we find Union of South Africa hauling an express at what looks like a high speed.

**Union of South Africa:** _(cheerily)_ I'm just doing what I do best! _(whistles)_ Coming through!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** There're two more Black 5's here doing a doubleheader on a local passenger train. I'm guessing it's a doubleheader for the benefit of photographers.

**Eric Treacy:** _(crossly)_ Why does it have to be you leading Alderman, why can't it be me?!

**Alderman A. E. Draper:** _(annoyed)_ Oh will you shut the hell up and stop complaining?! The journey's already underway so will you just deal with it?!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** And if we look down here, we can find Met 1 and his faithful coach Jubilee assisting Sarah Siddons on the London Underground.

**Met 1:** Thanks for allowing me and Jubilee to help you on the London Underground Sarah Siddons.

**Jubilee:** We're really enjoying ourselves.

**Sarah Siddons:** No problem guys, I really needed your help since passenger numbers were on the increase.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Oh and look here, Royal Scot seems to be stuck on the Lickey Incline again.

**Royal Scot:** _(annoyed)_ Argh fuck, not again! Why me?!

**King Edward II:** _(puffs past teasingly)_ Not so reliable are you Royal Scot, constantly getting stuck on the Lickey Incline!

**Royal Scot:** _(angrily)_ Oh don't remind me you brainless King!

**Panther:** _(comes up behind Royal Scot's passenger train)_ Don't worry Royal Scot, help has arrived!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** And as Panther helps Royal Scot up the Lickey Incline, we shall now move onto the main plot. Flying Scotsman knows everyone and everything associated with the mainline and all of its sights and sounds. He's also the smartest and wisest engine of them all. As he took his passengers along, he had to briefly stop at a signal where he found County of Essex resting in a nearby siding.

**Flying Scotsman:** You know County of Essex, if I couldn't see all these faces and places, I'd think I was working on a different mainline in another country. You've worked wonders with these rails. I really don't know what we steamies would do without diesels like you.

**County of Essex:** _(laughs)_ I'm glad you're pleased. Manager said lets mend the track so well he won't know where he is. And we did, and you didn't, if you take my meaning.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Flying Scotsman did indeed take County of Essex's meaning and he liked this hard working mainline diesel. The signal changed to green and both set off. Running side, they pulled into the next station.

**County of Essex:** There're still some bad parts of the track yet to mend and most of them are straights where the track can bend in the sun. Engines might derail on those parts, particularly Oliver Cromwell because he will rock and roll along the line when he's in a bad mood or full of himself. I mean, look at him right now. _(Oliver Cromwell approaches on the other track)_ I shouldn't like his passengers hurt.

**Oliver Cromwell:** What about me? I'm a plain speaking engine and I believe I'm plain speaking so speak up!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** County of Essex warned Oliver Cromwell about the bad parts of track.

**Oliver Cromwell:** _(grunts)_ Pah, I know my way about! I don't need smelly diesels to tell me what to do!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** And with that, he wheeshed away, leaving County of Essex feeling hurt and Flying Scotsman feeling sorry for his diesel friend. That afternoon, Oliver Cromwell still wasn't in a good mood. He was running late as he entered a station where he met Sovereign.

**Sovereign:** You're late Ollie!

**Oliver Cromwell:** I know and it's that smelly diesels fault, County of Essex tries to teach me how to stay on the rails and leaves me to fetch my own coaches!

**Sovereign:** _(sympathetically)_ Poor you Ollie. I know all about diesels, I mean I remember when a diesel crept into our yards once and ordered us about. I soon sent him packing.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** As Sovereign puffed away, Oliver Cromwell was filled with admiration. However, he didn't know that Sovereign was even more boastful than he commonly was and sometimes didn't tell the truth, especially when you consider she had nothing to do with the whole saga with Devlin. And you know what I'm finding confusing at this point: How come Sovereign and County of Essex have never met?! Well anyway, as Oliver Cromwell was puffing along, he only had one thing on his mind.

**Oliver Cromwell:** _(snorts)_ Send County of Essex packing, send County of Essex packing!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** He climbed a hill furiously.

**Oliver Cromwell's Driver:** _(encouragingly)_ Well done Ollie, keep it up!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Soon, they reached a stretch that had been bent in the sun. However, because Oliver Cromwell was feeling full of himself, he somehow failed to see the biggest bend of the lot in the distance.

**Oliver Cromwell:** Nothings happened, nothings happened, silly old diesel, clever me!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** He then preceded to rock and roll down the stretch.

**Oliver Cromwell's Driver:** Steady Ollie!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Unfortunately, dare I say it, it was too late. Olive Cromwell hit the biggest bend in the stretch and was derailed. Fortunately, it was only him that came off the rails, his tender and all the coaches stayed on the track.

**Oliver Cromwell:** Sleepers and ballast, I'm off!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Why doesn't the bastard listen? Meanwhile, County of Essex and Flying Scotsman were just hearing the news about Oliver Cromwell's derailment. County of Essex knew it was going to be her that has to go to the rescue.

**County of Essex:** I warned him but all he did was call me names!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** County of Essex was refusing to move.

**Flying Scotsman:** _(sternly)_ I'm ashamed of you County of Essex. Think of the passengers, what're they going to do eh?

**County of Essex:** _(gasps in realisation)_ Ooh I've forgotten about them yes, we must help the passengers.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** County of Essex now roared into life. She fetched some workmen and the breakdown cranes and then set off to the rescue. Back with Oliver Cromwell and he was standing sad and solitary, he couldn't rock and roll now.

**Oliver Cromwell:** Oh dear, everyone will know how silly I am.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Just then, County of Essex arrived and manoeuvred the breakdown cranes into position. The workmen attached them to Oliver Cromwell and then the cranes lifted Ollie back onto the rails. After that, Oliver Cromwell was much more careful all day. At long last, evening came and as County of Essex was taking on more fuel, Oliver Cromwell puffed up alongside her.

**Oliver Cromwell:** _(whispers)_ County of Essex, thank you for helping me and I'm sorry I was rude to you.

**County of Essex:** That's alright Ollie.

**Oliver Cromwell:** I wish we had more diesels like you. Lets be friends.

**County of Essex:** Suits me Ollie. We'll mend that bad bit of track and all the other bent stretches, well as many as we possibly can, first thing tomorrow.

**And that's episode 122/episode 49 of T&FMLA Series 4 done! Hope you enjoyed my parody of TTTE episode **_**'Rock 'n' Roll'**_**. Please review, I request criticism and I apologise if it's a bit short. And on that bombshell, it's time to end, thanks very much for reading, goodnight!**


	50. I'm Caught Up in the Middle

**Tonight - Prairie gets wrongly blamed, the Duke gets reminded of an embarrassing moment and Devlin says something considered racist to steam engines.**

_**Tornado and Friends Mainline Adventures**_

Hello readers of this not very good and not so popular fanfic series, this' Olton Hall, aka Hogwarts Castle here and I bring you good news because I just received word from Mr Writer and it turns out that this isn't the final episode after all! This' actually the penultimate episode and the next episode will be the series finale and it's going to be a bonus episode, especially when you consider that it was the last Thomas style episode I remember my mainline friends having. Anyway, for today's episode, my little friend Prairie got blamed for something that wasn't her fault. Find out what happened now as I narrate what turned out to be our version of TTTE episode _'Middle Engine'_. Enjoy! By the way, note that the title of today's episode's basically a song by the girl band Sugababes.

**This episode stars:**

**GWR 4575 Class no.5521/London Transport no.L150 (who we named Prairie)**

**Devlin the Class 09 Shunting Diesel**

**LMS Black 5 no.44871 **_**'Sovereign'**_

**LMS Black 5 no.44932 (who we named Solaris)**

**LMS Princess Coronation no.46233 **_**'Duchess of Sutherland'**_

**BR Standard Class 8 no.71000 **_**'Duke of Gloucester'**_

**The Fat Director**

**A Yard Manager**

**A Dock Manager**

**Metropolitan Railway Electric Locomotive no.12 **_**'Sarah Siddons'**__**(mentioned)**_

Episode 123: I'm Caught Up in the Middle

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** The Fat Director's engines love their work, whether they're pulling express trains, local passenger trains or goods trains. However, none of them likes being a middle engine because it's no fun being stuck in the middle. One morning, Prairie was cheerfully collecting coal trucks from the smelter yards where Devlin was working. And before you ask, I still have no idea how he managed to find a way back here! He was still enjoying playing tricks on steam engines like before though. Prairie didn't want to fall for his tricks again, but before she knew it, Devlin pushed some more trucks into Prairie and she was now stuck in the middle.

**Prairie:** _(chuffs crossly)_ Oh bollocks!

**Devlin:** _(teasingly)_ Little red piggy in the middle.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Devlin then rumbled away. Prairie's driver was cross. With trucks in front of her and trucks behind, Prairie had to go slowly as she departed the smelters yard, pushing and pulling her coal trucks. Further down the mainline, Sovereign was taking on water in a siding when Prairie steamed slowly by.

**Sovereign:** _(laughs)_ It's slowcoach Prairie!

**Prairie:** _(fuming)_ You wouldn't be laughing if you were stuck in the middle!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** As Prairie carried on her journey, she was thinking about all the moments she had had throughout this series.

**Prairie:** Why do I bother eh? I started out with shunting and hauling passengers on the London Underground. Now look at me, thanks to Sarah Siddons returning to work, while I still have the shunting, I'm now hauling goods trains! Just why do I bloody bother?!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** As she pondered furiously over that, she soon arrived at the coaling plant. Upon arrival, one by one, she shunted her trucks onto the tippers loading ramp where the coal was unloaded. Prairie was not allowed to cross the loading ramp until the tipper had been turned off because it was against the rules. Later on, Prairie was buffered up to some trucks but not coupled onto them. Her driver and fireman went away for a lunch break. However, no sooner had they left, there was trouble. Solaris reversed into the coaling plant to pick up coal.

**Solaris:** Alright then, lets get you trucks in order!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Solaria bumped into the trucks and the trucks bumped into Prairie. Prairie was pushed onto the loading ramp! When Solaris was coupled up to the trucks, he quickly took them away, leaving Prairie alone on the loading ramp which then started to lift her up.

**Prairie:** _(cries)_ Help, I'm not a truck!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** No one heard her cries though. Prairie was hoisted up, tipped over which resulted in her losing all of her coal, and brought back down again. One Prairie had been lowered back onto the ground, her driver, fireman and the yard manager arrived and the yard manager was very cross.

**Yard Manager:** _(angrily)_ You've caused confusion and delay, I'll have to report this to the Fat Director!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Prairie was shocked and confused, how could this possibly be her fault? She tried to explain what had happened but unfortunately for her, the yard manager wasn't listening as he walked angrily away. That evening at the , the Fat Director was very cross with Prairie

**The Fat Director:** _(sternly)_ I'm very disappointed in you Prairie, you know it's against the rules to go on the tippers loading ramp!

**Prairie:** _(sadly)_ Sorry sir, but it wasn't my fault, it's because that diesel made me a middle engine!

**Duchess of Sutherland:** And it wasn't Prairie's fault sir!

**Duke of Gloucester:** Yeah, I was there when it happened. Solaris pushed Prairie onto the loading ramp by accident!

**The Fat Director:** _(sternly)_ Nevertheless, Prairie, you'll stay here in your siding and do absolutely no work until I can get to the bottom of this!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Poor Prairie was very upset and Duchess of Sutherland and Duke of Gloucester felt sorry for her. Then Sovereign spoke, thinking no one could hear her.

**Sovereign:** Pah, I could handle that diesel with bent buffers and a busted boiler!

**The Fat Director:** In that case Sovereign. You'll do Prairie's run to the smelters.

**Sovereign:** Y-Yes sir.

**Duke of Gloucester:** Hard luck Sovereign.

**Sovereign:** _(crossly)_ Oh shut up Rudolph!

**Duke of Gloucester:** _(shouts)_ Hey, don't remind me of that!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Duchess of Sutherland giggled as she remembered the tale of her boyfriend getting stung by that bee which resulted in him getting a red nose like Rudolph. Duke of Gloucester blushed with embarrassment when he heard his girlfriends giggles. The next , Sovereign arrived at the smelters yard where she was determined not to be tricked by Devlin. And speak of the devil, he rolled up alongside her.

**Devlin:** _(oozes)_ Hello Sovereign, come to learn a thing or two from he who knows?

**Sovereign:** _(huffs importantly)_ Just get my trucks ready will ya and stay outta my way!

**Devlin:** _(chimes greasily)_ Yes miss.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Devlin whirred away to sort out Sovereign's trucks. When they were eventually ready, Sovereign cheerfully backed up to them and as she was being coupled up, she felt certain that she had fooled Devlin. Unfortunately for her, she was wrong as she saw Devlin pushing some trucks towards and then into her with a hard biff.

**Devlin:** _(chortles)_ Big black piggy in the middle!

**Sovereign:** That's racist you know!

**Devlin:** _(cheers)_ Just like Prairie!

**Sovereign:** _(huffs)_ How can I be like Prairie?! She's a tank engine while I'm a tender engine! Also, she's painted red while I'm painted black! Plus, I'm not a middle engine and therefore I'm not moving!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** And she didn't. When the Fat Director heard the news, he sent Prairie to fetch Sovereign. This made Prairie happy. When she arrived, she was coupled up to the train and then took all the trucks, along with Sovereign, to the docks. Prairie had no problems hauling this particular train, even though Sovereign wasn't trying to help her little friend. When Prairie brought the train into the docks the dock manager was very pleased.

**Dock Manager:** Well done Prairie, you're right on time. But I've got to ask, what's Sovereign doing there in the middle of the train?

**Prairie:** She's learning sir.

**Dock Manager:** Learning Prairie, learning what?

**Prairie:** Learning to be a middle engine.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Sovereign covered herself in steam in the hope that no one would recognise her. It was no good though. There're quite a few black painted tender engines working on the Fat Director's mainline but only one acts like this one and everyone knows that particular engines name's Sovereign.

**And that's episode 123/episode 50 of T&FMLA Series 4 done! Hope you enjoyed my parody of TTTE episode **_**'Middle Engine'**_**. Please review, I request criticism and I apologise if it's a bit short. And on that bombshell, it's time to end, thanks very much for reading, goodnight!**


	51. A Medal Only for Tornado

**In tonight's very last T&FMLA episode - a helicopter gets sworn at, a character from A Series of Heritage Lines returns and…two songs in one episode?**

_**Tornado and Friends Mainline Adventures**_

Hello readers of this not very good and not so popular fanfic series, this' Olton Hall, aka Hogwarts Castle here and…well, this' it, the actual series finale, or to be more specific, the very last episode of Tornado and Friends Mainline Adventures. And believe me, with this bonus episode, we're going out with a bang…well, we certainly hope so anyway. After this, Mr Writer would've completely run out of ideas and he knows that overall this series lacks originality. It's just that he can't come up with his own ideas which was a bit of a shame but that was how it went. Anyways, to close the series for the very last time, Tornado and Roberto have a race. However, Tornado had to abandon in the middle of it because an important issue had arisen. Find out what sort of issue it was now as I narrate what turned out to be our version of TTTE episode _'Three Cheers for Thomas'_. Enjoy!

**This episode stars:**

**LNER Peppercorn A1 no.60163 **_**'Tornado'**_

**SR Schools Class no.30926 **_**'Repton'**_

**LMS 8F no.48151 **_**'Gauge O Guild'**_

**LMS Princess Royal no.46201 **_**'Princess Elizabeth'**_

**LMS Princess Coronation no.46233 **_**'Duchess of Sutherland'**_

**LMS Jubilee no.45699 **_**'Galatea'**_

**LMS Jubilee no.45690 **_**'Leander'**_

**LMS Jubilee no.45596 **_**'Bahamas'**_

**LMS Patriot no.45551 **_**'The Unknown Warrior'**_

**The Fat Director**

**Roberto the Bus**

**Harry the Helicopter**

**A Boy and some Children**

**LMS Royal Scot no.46100 **_**'Royal Scot'**__**(mentioned)**_

**LMS Royal Scot no.46115 **_**'Scots Guardsman'**__**(mentioned)**_

**LMS Jubilee no.45593 **_**'Kolhapur'**__**(mentioned)**_

**Amara the Traction Engine **_**(mentioned)**_

**Other engines mentioned in a song:**

**LNER A4 no.4464 **_**'Bittern'**_

**SR Battle of Britain no.34067 **_**'Tangmere'**_

**SR Merchant Navy no.35028 **_**'Clan Line'**_

**Claire the Class 12 Shunting Diesel**

**Korra the Class 11 Shunting Diesel**

**SR West Country no.34046 **_**'Braunton'**_

**LMS Black 5 no.44871 **_**'Sovereign'**_

**BR Standard Class 4 2-6-0 no.76079 **_**'Pocket Rocket'**_

**GWR 4575 Class no.5521/London Transport no.L150 (who we named Prairie)**

Bonus Episode 2: A Medal Only for Tornado

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** It was an exciting day on the Great British mainline.

**Harry:** _(calls)_ Good morning everybody!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** _(annoyed)_ Oh fuck off Harry! Anyways, it was the UK school sports day championship and Tornado was helping Repton take the children to the field where all the events were taking place. Tornado puffed into the station nearest to the field to drop off some more children. Repton was already doing so on the other station platform.

**Boy:** I hope I'm number one and win a medal.

**Tornado:** _(chuffs)_ It must be splendid to win a medal. After all, I'm the number one engine on the mainline.

**Repton:** _(sighs)_ Whatever you say Tornado.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Tornado then puffed away to fetch some more children. As she chuffed along, she was constantly thinking about medals. She imagined herself wearing a gold medal on a red ribbon and how smart she'd look. Later on, Tornado had finished helping Repton deliver all the children to sports day and she was now on her way to the yards for a rest and to take on some more coal and water, she was beginning to feel rather thirsty and hungry. While en route for the yards, she had to stop at a red signal alongside a lake. In a siding near to her was Gauge O Guild and he was watching his driver and fireman doing something Tornado really disliked.

**Gauge O Guild:** Hello Tornado, I'm just having a rest before I go and do my next job after my morning work and my driver and fireman decided to spend this downtime by doing some fishing. Where're you going then?

**Tornado:** I'm heading to the yards to get some more coal and water. And I'll tell you now, I really don't want to see anyone fishing after my past experience of that dreaded so-called activity. And while your footplate crew enjoy it, I take it you enjoy fishing as well?

**Gauge O Guild:** Well since I'm primarily the engine responsible for delivering fish every night, certainly. Besides, it reminds me of a song and it goes like this:

_(Gauge O Guild sings TTTE song 'Gone Fishing')_

_Sometimes it's nice to take some time out_

_Do what you really want to do._

_Just to relax and let the world fly by you._

_Forget your worry, no need to hurry._

_Just leave a sign to say…_

_Gone fishing, gone fishing._

_It's a sunny old day and you're on your way_

_Gone fishing._

_Gone fishing, gone fishing._

_It's a sunny old day and you're on your way._

_Why don't we all go fishing?_

_You drop your line down to the river_

_Waiting to see what you can find._

_Whatever life has to offer you._

_You know you'll take it, stand up and face it._

_Smiling along the way._

_Gone fishing, gone fishing._

_It's a sunny old day and you're on your way_

_Gone fishing._

_Gone fishing, gone fishing._

_It's a sunny old day and you're on your way._

_Why don't we all go fishing?_

_There's nothing better on a sunny day_

_When all your work is done._

_Throw down your line, settle down._

_Surprise, surprise, look what you've found._

_Gone fishing, gone fishing._

_It's a sunny old day and you're on your way_

_Gone fishing._

_Gone fishing, gone fishing._

_It's a sunny old day and you're on your way._

_Why don't we all go fishing?_

_It's a sunny old day and you're on your way…_

_Gone fishing!_

**Tornado:** Not exactly what I wanted to hear but I'll bid you farewell.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** It was the perfect timing for Tornado to say that as her signal changed to green. She puffed quickly away, the sooner she got her coal and water the better. However, when she reached the next junction, she had to stop again. Tornado really wasn't happy about this.

**Tornado:** _(angrily)_ Oh bloody buggering hell! Is there anymore red signals I've got to stop at?! How much does it take for me to just get some coal and water?!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Just then, Princess Elizabeth and Duchess of Sutherland puffed up alongside her. They were double heading a local passenger train for the benefit of photographers but they were also having to stop at the junction.

**Princess Elizabeth:** Greetings to you Tornado on this fine day.

**Duchess of Sutherland:** What's going on with you then?

**Tornado:** _(angrily)_ All I want to do's get some more coal and water but this' the second time I've been made to stop at a red signal!

**Duchess of Sutherland:** Oh you poor young thing.

**Princess Elizabeth:** Even we're being made to stop aren't we BFF?

**Tornado:** You say you two are BFFs, but you two are actually cousins and even I know that.

**Princess Elizabeth:** We know, we know.

**Duchess of Sutherland:** We just feel that seeing each other as BFFs would be a better way for us to get along, especially since we get along so well already.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** After a few more minutes of talking, Tornado and the BFF cousins signals changed to green and they were all on their way again. Tornado eventually arrived at the yard and she was very relieved, she could now finally get her coal and water. As her tender was being filled up with more coal, Galatea arrived.

**Galatea:** Hello Tornado, taking on more coal are you?

**Tornado:** Yes indeed I am. And what're you doing here Galatea?

**Galatea:** My sister Leander's inside that shed over there being repainted and I just came to see the finished product. Also, she said that she had a surprise in wait.

**Tornado:** Oh really? Well, speaking of being repainted, wasn't Royal Scot recently repainted from red to green?

**Galatea:** Yes indeed he was.

**Tornado:** Isn't his younger brother Scots Guardsman already painted green though?

**Galatea:** Yes and Royal Scot's now painted the same shade of BR green, meaning you'll probably find it hard to tell them apart now so you'll have to make sure to look at the engines number to make sure you know which one it is.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Just then, they heard a whistle as Leander emerged from the shed.

**Leander:** So, what do you think?

**Tornado:** BR black Leander, are you sure?

**Galatea:** I know there're going to be some people who'll be asking questions about that livery on you but personally, I love it, you look fantastic sister.

**Tornado:** I agree.

**Leander:** _(smiles)_ Thanks girls. Now I'm sure you're wondering what the surprise is Tia?

**Galatea:** I certainly am, so what's the surprise?

**Leander:** _(calls back to the shed)_ Okay, you can come out now!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Smoke and steam emerged from the shed before coming out of it all and alongside the engines was…

**Tornado and Galatea:** _(shocked)_ Bahamas?!

**Bahamas:** Yep, it's me. The Fat Director reached an agreement with the West Coast Railway Company to bring me back onto the mainline, so here I am.

**Galatea:** _(delightfully)_ Oh Bahamas I'm so happy to see you back!

**Tornado:** _(smiling)_ Well would you look at that, three Jubilee's working on the mainline. If only the other remaining Jubilee Kolhapur could see this moment.

**Leander:** I'm sure she'd love it.

**Galatea:** Yeah, it's a real shame she's just parked at Tyseley Locomotive Works constantly being made to wait for her restoration.

**Bahamas:** Yeah, pity. But anyways my sisters, I certainly can't wait to get to work so shall we get going?

**Galatea and Leander:** Lead the way Bahamas.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** With excited whistles, Bahamas led her sisters away to work. Tornado smiled as she puffed forward to the water tower to have her tanks refilled with water. Just then, as the water was being poured in, The Unknown Warrior arrived.

**The Unknown Warrior:** _(whistles)_ Hello Tornie.

**Tornado:** First Lizzie and now you, I'm presuming that 'Tornie' is my new nickname?

**The Unknown Warrior:** It certainly seems that way. Anyway, I'm taking the Fat Director to sports day.

**Tornado:** _(chuffs)_ You can get to see the egg and spoon race.

**The Unknown Warrior:** _(confused)_ I didn't know eggs and spoons had races.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Just then, Roberto emerged on the road alongside the track and he had heard what the engines had been talking about.

**Roberto:** She means the children race with eggs and spoons silly.

**Tornado:** And the winner gets a medal. I wish I could get a medal.

**The Unknown Warrior:** You'll need to win a race first.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** The Unknown Warrior then whistled away. Roberto then had an idea.

**Roberto:** I'll give you a race Tornado.

**Tornado:** _(cockily)_ You Roberto? What makes you think you can beat me if you previously failed to beat Lizzie?

**Roberto:** Well aren't you a cocky young one? How about this then: first one to the station's the winner.

**Tornado:** _(whistles)_ Well since I've got no jobs to do at the moment, you're on! Ready…steady…go!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** The two friends hurried away, the race was on. At one point, Roberto got stuck behind a slow moving Amara the Traction Engine. Tornado then raced past on the track.

**Tornado:** _(peeps)_ Better hurry Roberto!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Then it was Tornado who was held up as she had to stop at…

**Tornado:** _(crossly)_ Bollocks, not another red signal!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** There was a road bridge just in front of Tornado and inevitably…

**Roberto:** _(crosses the bridge, calls teasingly)_ Better hurry Tornado!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Tornado was angry as she saw Roberto cross the bridge. When the signal changed to green, she raced away and was gone almost in a flash. However, she was instantly cheered up when she saw Roberto halted at the next level crossing. Tornado raced towards the crossing and called as she crossed through it.

**Tornado:** _(calls)_ Last one there puffs hot air!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Now it was Roberto who was cross. Further down the line, Tornado was nearly at the station and could taste victory. Up ahead was another level crossing. As she drew near to it, she spotted something. It was a signalman waving a red flag, flagging her down. Tornado was fuming, Roberto was now sure to win. But then, Tornado saw the Fat Director.

**The Fat Director:** Tornado, the sports day medals have been left in my office at Kings Cross station. You must fetch them at once, we can't let the children down now can we?

**Tornado:** Of course not sir, I'm on my way sir! But wait a minute, wasn't The Unknown Warrior supposed to be taking you to sports day?

**The Fat Director:** He was supposed to yes but he had broken down so I've got to drive there, now get going!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Tornado then chuffed away to fulfil in her new mission. Meanwhile, Roberto had raced into the station.

**Roberto:** _(shouts)_ I won, I won!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Roberto then waited eagerly for Tornado to arrive. He waited and waited. Tornado however had forgotten about the race. Her mind was solely focussed on the children.

**Tornado:** I can't let them down, I can't let them down.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Tornado hurried along the line and eventually, she arrived at Kings Cross station. The stationmaster gave her driver the box of medals and then Tornado raced off again. Puffing as fast as she could, she arrived at the station nearest to the sports day playing field just in time.

**The Fat Director:** Well done Tornado.

**Tornado:** _(pants)_ Thank you sir.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Once sports day was over, the Fat Director presented the medals to the winners.

**The Fat Director:** Congratulations!

**Boy:** Thank you sir.

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** The next day at Barrow Hill Engine Shed, Tornado was just waking up. When she opened her eyes, she could feel something against her side. She looked and saw that she had a gold medal on a red ribbon wrapped across her funnel. Then, in the car park, she saw the Fat Director, Roberto and all the children who took part in sports day looking at her.

**The Fat Director:** Good morning Tornado. If you're wondering what we're doing here and why that medal's wrapped across your funnel, well you were very helpful at sports day yesterday.

**Boy:** So we decided that you should have a medal of your own.

**Tornado:** _(happily)_ My very own medal, thank you!

**Children:** _(cheering)_ Three cheers for Tornado!

**Roberto:** _(toots)_ But I still won the race!

**The Fat Director:** _(crossly)_ Don't spoil the moment Roberto you killjoy!

**Olton Hall the Narrator:** Tornado blew her whistle delightfully, she was beaming with pride.

**The Fat Director:** And to thank you once more, since you seem to have adopted the nickname of 'Tornie', the children have got the perfect song to sing for you. Ready with your stereo Roberto?

**Roberto:** Ready sir!

**The Fat Director:** Okay children, a one…a two…a one, two, three, four!

_(The Children sing TTTE song 'Thomas' Anthem', see if you can spot the differences)_

_It's Tornie the Young Engine._

_Hip, hip, hip, hip, hooray!_

_Chugga-chugga, chugg, chugg_

_Chuff, chuff, chuff._

_She rides along the way._

_And when you hear that whistle,_

_It can only be one train._

_Our favourite big young engine,_

_Tornado's her name!_

_Tornie the Young Engine rolling along, (Tornado whistles)_

_All of her friends will be coming along._

_Tornie, we love you!_

_She's a really useful engine_

_With her heart that's big and strong._

_She chugga-chugga, chuff-chuffs working hard_

_Helping Everyone._

_Tornie, she has lots of friends_

_And you can be one to._

_Just clap, clap, clap and sing-along_

_Tornie, we love you._

_Tornie the Young Engine rolling along, (Tornado whistles)_

_All of her friends will be coming along._

_Tornie, we love you._

_There's Bittern, and Tangmere,_

_Clan Line, Claire, and Korra,_

_Lizzie, and Gauge O Guild,_

_And don't forget Braunton!_

_Repton, and Sovereign,_

_Pocket Rocket, Prairie._

_Lots more friends for you._

_She's always up to mischief,_

_That cheeky big, young train._

_She chugga-chugga-chuff-chuffs everywhere,_

_She's always playing games._

_The Fat Director scolds her,_

_But loves her just the same._

_Our favourite big, young engine,_

_Tornado's her name!_

_Tornie the Young Engine rolling along, (Tornado whistles)_

_All of her friends will be coming along_

_Tornie, we love you._

_Tornie the Young Engine rolling along, (Tornado whistles)_

_All of her friends will be coming along._

_Tornie we love you,_

_Tornie we love you,_

_Tornado,_

_We love you!_

**Tornado:** _(smiles)_ Thank you so much everyone and I love you all to.

**And that's the bonus episode and in fact the whole series of T&FMLA Series 4 done! Hope you enjoyed my parody of TTTE episode **_**'Three Cheers for Thomas'**_** and my versions of the songs **_**'Gone Fishing'**_** and **_**'Thomas' Anthem/Thomas We Love You'**_**. Please review and I request criticism. And I can't thank all you readers enough checking out my episodes but this now really is the end. So, on that bombshell, it's time to end, thanks very much for reading, goodnight!**


End file.
